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2004's Science Talent Search Winners Are In

Posted by timothy on from the smart-cookies-solving-problems dept.

Slate is running an article about this year's Science Talent Search (concentrating on things like whether the participants are "weirdos"); there are better descriptions of the top entrants' projects at this results page. Congratulations to the winners!

7 of 128 comments (clear)

  1. Beware my fate! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I won my senior year in high school and now all I do is post on /.

    1. Re:Beware my fate! by Walt+Dismal · · Score: 4, Funny

      I feel for you, brother! When I was in kindergarden, I invented and patented the magneto-ionic shaving rotisserie. Not only do you get closer shaves, your chicken is moist and tender. But that's not all. In grade school I experimented with human pheromone technology, but I had to move on to other research after my English teacher got pregnant. In high school, I invented a graphic user interface and windowing system for PCs, though my research notes mysteriously disappeared. My good pal Bill Gates helped me search for them but then had to go off to college at Harvard. Out of high school, I decided to take a year off before moving on to university. In my first job, at Tasty Freeze, I invented the banana split. I am now fabulously wealthy and do not need Science Talent Searches. But I have advice for all you youngers and future winners reading Slashdot. And that advice is: Get a Life.

  2. dammit. by hot_Karls_bad_cavern · · Score: 5, Funny

    Now i feel old AND stupid. Thanks a lot you insensitive clod!

  3. Say what? by Caedar · · Score: 4, Funny

    "Like any company eager to burnish its brand, Intel had produced a brochure with the finalists' bios and a description of their projects--from Boris Alexeev of Athens, Ga. ("Minimal Deterministic Finite Automata--DFAs--for Testing Divisibility"), to Ning Zhou of Plymouth, Minn. ("Quantitative Trait Loci Modulating Corpus Callosum Size in the Mouse Brain")." Did they supply a dictionary with that brochure, as well?

  4. Talent Search, Eh? ]] by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny


    Oh, that is bloody fucking terrible. This is the worst -- you are the worst scientist I have ever seen. Listen, do the world a favor and keep this... this thing away from us all. Kill yourself. Move far, far away and just hurl yourself off a cliff. Your parents ought to be ashamed of having you. Just... just take this 'cure for cancer' and get the hell out of my studio!

    Now, where's the hot scientists?
    </British Accent>

  5. Ugly photos by FooAtWFU · · Score: 5, Funny
    The photos of those kids are ugly. Not because the kids are ugly... but whoever ran their pictures through whatever JPEG compressor they used obviously knows as much about photo manipulation as I do about brain surgery.

    That said, looks like some rather spiffy stuff there.

    --
    The World Wide Web is dying. Soon, we shall have only the Internet.
  6. I wish... by Lakedemon · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... that somebody would give me between 20.000 and 100.000 $ for each theorem I proved. These kids are lucky...