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Better Business Bureau Targets Apple's G5 Ads
deathazre writes "The Council of Better Business Bureaus has suggested Apple Computer withdraw its claims of the world's fastest, and first 64-bit, PC after a complaint by Dell. However, even having one of their ads banned in the U.K. didn't stop them here in the States."
Dear Apple,
I am a homosexual. I bought an Apple computer because of its well earned reputation for being "the" gay computer. Since I have become an Apple owner, I have been exposed to a whole new world of gay friends. It is really a pleasure to meet and compute with other homos such as myself. I plan on using my new Apple computer as a way to entice and recruit young schoolboys into the homosexual lifestyle; it would be so helpful if you could produce more software which would appeal to young boys. Thanks in advance.
with much gayness,
Father Randy "Pudge" O'Day, S.J.
Dear Father O'Day:
Thanks for your letter. Being Catholic myself, I know exactly what you're talking about! It has always been our plan here at Apple Computer Inc to revolutionize personal computing with our high-quality and highly gay products.
I'm happy to answer your letter by letting you know that YES we will be releasing an entire hLife ("homo-life") software line. You'll be able to recognize it in stores by the small stylized logo depicting a large cock entering a tight anus with an Apple logo on it. ("Suddenly it all comes together" indeed!).
Anyway, I hope you and other members of our community will join us on our mission, and purchase the exciting new hLife boxed set. Only the boxed set comes with translucent cock rings!
Sincerely,
Harry Rodman
Vice-president
Homosexual Liaison Services
Apple Computer, Inc.
that we have Dell looking out for us consumers.. Isn't that EXTRA special?? Gives me the warm and fuzzies.. I think this somehow revolves around Michael Dell's obsession with becomming Steve Jobs.. He's so jealous..
Oh piss off, you fucking whiner. If you're so damned concerned about the homeless and the hungry, get off your fat ass and do something about it, instead of sitting in front of a computer reading slashdot, loser.
Life is hard, and the world is cruel
You're arguing a completely different point than what the BBB (and others) are annoyed about. Apple claimed they were the first 64 bit desktop computer. They were not. Period, there is no ambiguity.
Whether or not G5s are faster than whatever Dell is selling these days, or whatever is the best computer for building clusters has nothing to do with this particular issue.
They (VA Tech) choose G5s as both a political statement (political within the current computing market) and because they were wrong about perfomance differences. Every other scientific or government body in the world does not use G5s for their super computing needs for a reason: it is expensive and less powerful than alternatives. Jesus Christ you're a moron.
Which one will be in the top 5?
Both of them, dumbass.
autopr0n is like, down and stuff.
Only on benchmarks run by Apple. On everyone else's benchmarks, the dual G5 didn't beat the fastest single processor P4 on most tests. Only those tests that could actually take significant advantage of dual CPUs came out ahead on the Apple G5.
And no, it doesn't matter how many computers I own, I was using it as an example to illustrate my point. Are we clear?
There's one thing I'm not clear on.
Weren't you supposed to go home and kill yourself?
Well, there are those who claim that the Opteron was available long before the G5, and there are those who claim that Virginia Tech would have chosen the Opteron if it had been available in numbers (say a thousand). Both groups however claim that Apple Fanatics are much more unreasonable than AMD supporters.
Lars T.
To the guy who modded me down from perfect to terrible Karma - Apple haters still suck