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Virtual Pilot Lands Qantas Jet

An anonymous reader writes "Australian airline Qantas has successfully tested an automated landing where both the pilot and the control tower didn't talk to each other. The plane was being piloted by a "Virtual Pilot" located in the control tower."

13 of 65 comments (clear)

  1. In Related News... by fuzzybunny · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...a Quantas flight carrying 357 passengers and crew plummeted to its destruction for unknown reasons.

    Sydney air traffic control reports picking up garbled radio traffic fragments, but is still trying to decode the meaning of "D00D! U G0T PWNT!!!"

    --
    Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage
  2. Re:Landing was tough by snerdy · · Score: 2, Funny
    I always implicitly rate my pilot based on the landing, how much of a bump, whether we hop, etc. Just like I rate Chinese restaurants based on their Hot & Sour Soup.

    You rate your soup on how much of a bump it gives you, whether you hop, etc.?

  3. What happens if... by Wowbagger5 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Physics access error appears on the screen. Will the plane suddenly stop in mid-air, like in a bugs bunny cartoon? Or will they have to phone up Bill Gates and have him re-write the laws of physics?

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    Still Rampant, Wowbagger
    1. Re:What happens if... by Patrik_AKA_RedX · · Score: 2, Funny
      Or will they have to phone up Bill Gates and have him re-write the laws of physics?
      If Bill Gates wrote the laws of physics, that would explain why the sky is blue.
  4. Re:Virtual Terrorist? by WayneConrad · · Score: 4, Funny

    How long until a virtual terrorist hijacks the uplink and "lands" this automated plane in a building?

    I'll bet that nobody thought of that. We know that aviation people just don't give a darn for safety. And people just don't worry about protecting themselves from terrible things that have already happened.

    There's probably not a pilot on the plane who can take over any time he wants.

    The whole system is probably connected to the internet, too.

    Heck, the uplink is probably unencrypted tones on a CB channel that any kid could generate by whistling into his walkie talkie.

    Yes, we should be scared.

  5. This can help the pilots by AtariAmarok · · Score: 2, Funny

    Look at it this way. The pilots will be happy because they won't have those annoying "fly the plane" tasks interfering with their drinking schedule.

    --
    Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
  6. Re:Are the sure it's safe? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    If you consider genie pigs, it's pretty logical that your own website is called almostsmart...

  7. Genie pigs? 3 wishes by AtariAmarok · · Score: 2, Funny

    If you consider genie pigs

    Oh Genie! Grant me now my 3 wishes:

    1. Bacon
    2. Pork
    3. More pork

    --
    Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
  8. Re:Landing was tough by WormholeFiend · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Even now, when I'm on a commercial flight, I always implicitly rate my pilot based on the landing, how much of a bump, whether we hop, etc."

    The ethnic group I belong to is known and sometimes laughed at) for cheering and applauding the pilot of an airplane after a successful landing (WOOO WE MADE IT!), most often in chartered flights to/from caribbean resorts. I guess we were right to do it all along!

  9. Re:What about the pilot jobs? by rpjs · · Score: 2, Funny

    Old pilot joke:

    In a few years' time there'll be only two crew on the flight deck: a captain and a dog. The captain will be there to feed the dog, and the dog will be there to bite the captain if he tries to touch the controls.

  10. Re:I think this is probably driven by... by rkhalloran · · Score: 3, Funny

    Thinking of ST II: Wrath of Khan, where Kirk uses the 'prefix code' of the ship Khan's hijacked to drop its shields just before blasting it... Then you have the problem of keeping the in-cabin override switch unknown to the general public so the hijackers can't just lock out the tower as soon as they take the cockpit.

  11. Coming Soon by mrlsd · · Score: 3, Funny

    Coming soon: virtual passengers to save the airline industry.

  12. Re:Virtual Terrorist? by siriuskase · · Score: 2, Funny

    Right and the entire air traffic control system has been replaced by a network of Sony Playstations with all important maneuvers being determined by ten year old kids who think they are just playing a game.

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    If you must moderate, please moderate as irrelevent, not something bad, because I'm sure someone will find this interest