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DaimlerChrysler Looks for Dismissal of SCO Suit
Ian Atkins writes "DaimlerChrysler has told SCO where it can stick its lawsuit. In a filing in Michigan, the car company has said not only does it not have to give SCO the information it asked for, but that it hasn't used the software SCO claims rights over - for seven years. It has asked the judge to throw the whole thing out of court. Another bad for SCO and its MS-backed Linux crusade it would seem. Full details on Techworld here." Reader Eggplant62 notes that Groklaw is also covering the story, and noting that SCO has dropped their claim that the GPL is unconstitutional.
Tune in every Tuesday and watch Darl as he tries to survive in the courts. Next season don't miss the "Darl Survivor II" premier episode where he gets strip searched prior to entering prison. Soon after he meets his new roomate Bubba, who introduces himself and then says, "I like your butt Darly boy".
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
"Your honor, we have no idea who these poor schmendriks are. We might have used some of their software in the mid 90's before we got beaten with a clue stick, but that was when we were still using Reynolds & Reynolds green screens and we didn't know what the INTARWEB was. Please make them go away?"
When in doubt, parenthesize. At the very least it will let some poor schmuck bounce on the % key in vi. (Larry Wall)
You do not support the groupthink and therefore should be moderated down.
Everything that Microsoft does is evil. Everything SCO does is evil. Everything Linux community does is good. Remember that, and good luck with your comments next time.
So says a lawyer.
Next article up: SCOs lawyers file a motion that Daimlers lawyers are full of shit and they use SCO IP wrongly every day.
Seriously, you think it's that easy? What if you were on trial for stealing a DVD player (or whatver), do you think you can just say to the judge "I havent even watched a movie for 7 years so I dont even have a dvd player"?
I don't need no instructions to know how to rock!!!!
We're the Mercedes-Benz of.. Mercedes-Benz, SCO bitches!
Must-not-watch TV!
Im getting very tired of this whole SCO thing. As such, I propose that this be solved via the famous "Trial By Stone," designed by Jim Henson.
In the movie "The Dark Crystal" The Skeksis decide who gets to be emperor by who could put the largest dent in a solid stone with the swing of a sword.
General: Chamberlain! I challenge!
Chamberlain: Trial by stone.
General: Trial by stone!
General, in a rush of massive anger, swings and chops the stone in half, becoming the emperor.
Linus, Darl, It is time to pick up your swords and swing.
TRIAL BY STONE!
no
DaimlerChrysler has told SCO where it can stick its lawsuit.
Truly now is that the way they did it?
More than likely it was:
Dear Sir or Madaam,
Put forth hereth we knowth thus blah blah blah
Now to tell SCO where to stick it would be more like:
Listen up you stupid idiots,
We have no idea what the fuck you are talking about so piss off and crawl back into your hole and die.
With love,
DaimlerChrysler
will notice the next time they buy a Chrysler, that their cars seem to be missing items, say like brakes?
Oh, I suspect that Darl and company better not get parts from AutoZone either.
AutoZone salesman: Oh, Mr. McBride, you don't want that kind of brake fluid off the shelf. We have a very special bottle behind the counter right here for you.
No trees were harmed in the composition of this; however, numerous electrons were inconvenienced.
Yeah, it would be nice if stuff like this could stay off the main page. I know this sound silly, but it does hurt /. credibility.
Hey, a pig just flew by my office window!!!
Exactly what does that add to this story?
Eleven words and two acronyms
Look at the bottom. The last sentance reads "SCO declined to comment"
I never thought Daryl would shut up.
nos laetus epulor qui would domito nos
Does DaimlerChrysler have some sort of OnStar system in their cars? If so, they should remotely disable all vehicles registered to SCO execs.
Trial by Sharon Stone - last person who doesn't faint in interrogation sequence wins
Trial by Bludstone - Gain mod points by posting obscure Dark Crystal references
Trial by Flintstone - Endurance rally race in which you drive a 600 lbs car cross country with your own two feet
Trial by Oliver Stone - conducted by the CIA
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
If SCO and RIAA got together, they'd have the highest expense of lawyers while offering no service or product to the public.
I thought M$ had good lawyers, man these two companies can sue any one of any status.
Some legal guy will probably blither that it's about burden of proof. At least in criminal matters.
Police prosecutor: "...the accused was seen walking out of a Best Buy with a DVD player. He was confronted by security, whereupon he said 'I am not the man you're looking for. There is no DVD player. Move along'. Security inexplicably let him go."
Accused: "I havent even watched a movie for 7 years so I dont even have a dvd player. I am not the man you're looking for. There is no DVD player."
Go To Your Room!
Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but copyright will always protect me.
I like the way many users have visualised the current state of affairs:
Tactical Map
SCO's current position
Relationship with IBM
Previously we reported that SCO was scraping the bottom of the barrel. We must now print a retraction:
It appears as though SCO is in fact not scraping the bottom of the barrel...any longer. They have broken through the bottom and are working themselves into a barrel sized pit. The barrel was located near an outhouse, and so now you can see where they are coming up with all this...stuff.
-Adam
I am hereby calling for a boycott of this godless German corporation! How dare they attack the rights of an heroic American corporation like SCO?
in this year's premiere episode, Darl is locked out of the prison library for filing ten frivolous lawsuits a day against individual farmers, seeking damages from all those who supplied rotten maggots in his gruel. "I require fresh maggots," he claims. other inmates on Block 27 promise Darl they can grow fresh maggots in his arms and legs....
if this is supposed to be a new economy, how come they still want my old fashioned money?
I think I'll even admit that UNIX is a computer software OS.
Fellowship 9/11
The SCO Group to sell Pre-loaded Unix PCs
LINDON, Utah, Apr 29, 2004/PRNewswire-FirstCall via COMTEX/ -- The SCO Group, Inc. (Nasdaq: SCOX), the owner of the UNIX® operating system and a leading provider of UNIX-based solutions, announced today that they are to begin selling PCs pre-loaded with SCO Unix.
In light of this change to their core strategy they will also be changing their name from The SCO Group Inc ("SCO") to Santa Cruz Unix Machines ("SCUM").
"We feel that our new name better reflects our business and core values," said Darl McBride, President and CEO, Santa Cruz Unix Machines, Inc. "As SCUM we feel we are sending the right message to consumers about the sort of company they are dealing with."
All products will be re-named to fit with the new corporate image.
Forward-Looking Statements
This press release contains forward looking statements related to SCUM's belief that the world is flat and that anyone with an IQ over 12 would ever want to do business with them again.
About SCUM
The SCUM Group (NASDAQ: SCOX) helps millions of customers in more than 82 countries to grow their businesses everyday. Headquartered in Lindon, Utah, SCUM has a worldwide network of more than 11,000 resellers and 4,000 developers. SCUM Global Services provides reliable localized support and services to partners and customers. For more information on SCUM products and services, visit http://www.sco.com.
SCO, SCUM and the associated SCUM logo are trademarks or registered trademarks of Santa Cruz Unix Machines, Inc. in the U.S. and other countries. UNIX is a registered trademark of The Open Group.
SOURCE Santa Cruz Unix Machines, Inc.
I propose we take this literally.
Boies: "Objection, you ho--"
Judge: (rolls up sleeves) "All right, I've had enough out of you. C'mere, bitch." *thwack!*