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Missing Matter... Still Missing
squidfrog writes "Nature.com, PhysicsWeb, and the BBC all report on the latest results from the Cryogenic Dark Matter Search. 'The most powerful search yet for the Universe's missing matter has come up empty handed, contradicting an earlier study that claimed to have seen new particles.' 'A favoured theory is that the dark matter consists of Wimps (weakly interacting massive particles) about a thousand times more massive than a proton, one of the particles found in an atom's nucleus... on the rare occasions a Wimp strikes an ordinary atom, the effect should be noticeable.' 'Writing in the Physical Review Letters, the team says that while a detection has yet to occur, there is now a better idea of how much dark matter must exist.' They 'hope to improve the sensitivity of the experiment by another factor of 20 over the next few years.' What's 20 times 0? And don't tell me zero!"
I wondered what that strange picture on my milk carton was.
Anyone in high school knows that if a wimp hits anything, no one notices. If someone did notice, he wouldn't be a wimp.
"As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly." A. Carlson
If a Wimp is about a thousand times more massive than a proton - what does that make a proton? a Wuss? or a Nerd?
- Your stupidity got you into this mess, why can't it get you out? -Will Rogers
The real dark matter in the universe is the massive SCO intellectual property rights that no one else has yet seen.
"It's the height of ridiculousness to say for those 9 lines you get hundreds of millions."
What if software bugs emit gravitons? Wouldn't that explain the apparent extra mass in the universe?
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
Zero.
Opps. I meant, seven.
The Cryogenic Dark Matter Search uses equipment at the bottom of a Minnesota mine to filter out all interference.
The underground observatory is some 1,000m beneath the surface. It is only from such an isolated place that scientists believe they have a chance of catching their quarry.
Excellent location choice! Even if they don't find any dark matter, at that depth they at least have a chance at locating the remnants of ex-Gov. Jesse Ventura's political career.
Massive wimps, huh? Never knew there was dark matter at my high school ...
Missing Matter ... still missing
Did anyone check under the cushions on the couch?
I was wondering how this story was going to be tied into SCO or Microsoft.
All they have to do is reverse the polarity of the anti-proton injectors in the warp core, re-route the resulting subspace pulse through the plasma conduits, synchronise the comm-system to transmit the frequency of the subspace distortion field to the deflector dish and emit a sub-tachyon particle scan over a wide area. That'd surely reveal what they're looking for!
Drill baby drill - on Mars
Dunno. But 20 divided by zero is &)%*$%*_))[LOST CARRIER]
1:00 - Still just a potato.
2:00 - "
3:00 - "
--
"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
> How could a wimp be so large and yet unnoticed?
You just described my entire high school career.
The detector is also chilled to within a tenth of a degree of absolute zero [...]
How do they do it?
Ever been to Minnesota? In the winter? You wouldn't have to ask.
The one page write up doesn't describe how they know the detector works, but I'm sure they have _some_ means of testing that it does.
Sure they do... the system has a green light on. If the red light were on it would be on standby and no light may mean there is no power, or the light is broken. But as long s the green light is on they know it's working.
Surely everyone knows that. Now please increase my grant.
I'd just like to be the first to say that it's an honor, Mister President, to count you amongst the Slashdot readership.
>
>Surely everyone knows that. Now please increase my grant
You forgot the third possibility. Suppose the power indicator LED is orange: it's hard to tell if we're in a superposition of states or merely oscillating very rapidly.
Or I just want a high-speed digital camera for Christmas.
Alright, maybe I'm just behind the times or a bit confused, but for the life of me I can't figure out IAKAP. Perhaps it was meant to be IANAP (I am not a physicist)?
The only other thing I can come up with is "I ain't knowledgeable about physics," and I'm just hoping that a statement like that wouldn't be abbreviated.
If a job's not worth doing, it's not worth doing right.
But the real question is how far can they overclock this puppy?
Well duh! Everyone Scientologist should know their cosmology, it's very simple.
As any Scientologist should know, this "missing" matter is really part of the Eternal Battery[1] used to power the electronic trap holding Xenu, the evil galactic overlord. It's somewhere here on Teege^W uhh, or however you spell that funky alternate name for Earth. Note that it's completely unlike R'yleh because Xenu is never supposed to escape from the trap, unlike Cthulu who is merely slumbering. Besides, Cthulu is just nonsense made up by someone insane...
[1] This doesn't violate the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics. Why? Because L. Ron Hubbard said so. Wouldn't you rather believe an (Ig) Nobel Prize Winner or some actual scientists?
Posted anon because Scientology is even more litigious than SCO!
"Oh no", says the first
"What's up?", Says number two
"I've lost an electron", says #1
"Are you sure?", Asks 2
"Yep, I'm positive" Says 1
AT&ROFLMAO
The most powerful search yet for the Universe's missing matter has come up empty handed,
No kidding? I guess that's why it's referred to as MISSING matter!
"Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
All studies looking for "missing matter" should cease immediately!
It is my theory that this missing matter -- things like that sock that disappears from the dryer, people's cigarette lighters, and the shoe that matches the other shoe lying on the side of the road -- all exists in a common extra-dimensional space. Given that something like 99% of the universe is Hydrogen, the same should hold true of missing matter.
Now imagine, if you will, what would happen if someone FOUND their sock or their lighter. Static cling? Flicking your Bic? Can you imagine what would happen if someone did that around all that Hydrogen?
Can you say "Big Bang"? Sure you can! It's the end of the universe as we know it!!
Just say NO! to dangerous scientific research!
...while I'm at it, death to Tully-Fisher! Up with Wilson-Bappu!! WooHooo!!!
You know, when our probes hit the sphere surrounding the solar system and reveal the entire cosmos beyond 250 AU is just an animated image on the shell of the Universe, you're going to feel awfully silly for believing in dark matter.
Of course, since Shiva will then destroy the world, you won't be feeling silly very long, which is a blessing.
The should be concentrating on where that missing sock always goes when you do laundry at a laundromat. Find that, they'll probably find the missing matter. At least the research should be cheaper
SB
It's old. The more humans I meet, the more I like my cats. At least they are honest.
I hate to say it, but CDMS II (this experiment) was SUPPOSED to not find WIMPs in this range. There was an experiment called DAMA which had found a modulation in their noise consistent with their being WIMP dark matter, and they claimed detection. The whole purpose of this press release is to say that DAMA's claimed detection is now *ruled out*.
Maybe I'm confused but in the article they use words like incompatible and inconsistent with DAMA. The also say this is the new limit on WIMP-nucleon scalar cross section. So apparently unless I'm wrong.. which I probably am CDMS II went further then DAMA and didn't find anything. Anyway check out fig. 5, and if I am wrong an explanation of it would be nice.
The best education consists in immunizing people against systematic attempts at education. - Paul Feyerabend
The problem with the debate about missing matter is that the underlying theory, Big Bang, is fatally flawed and thus all the derived associated theories are built upon incredible foundations. Like a house built on soft mud, no matter what you try, it keeps falling down. You may have noticed that Steven Hawking recently abandoned his Theory of Everything. UK Sunday Times Colour Magazine "Hawking's Big Bang". We believe he did that because he has read a new book, The Universe is a Cloud by me, Chris Coles. Further, we have produced a e-book of a second edition http://www.lrsp.com/ebooks.html that goes even further into where the present theories are wrong. One of the consequences of this book is that you should by now have noticed that the singularity has dissappeared. Take for example the big bit in Scientific American about time this month. In essence, they have made some really silly mistakes that, because they are so silly, really stupid mistakes, they are not even prepared to debate them. The first BIG mistake was that when a stars mass, (any star's mass), grew to the point that light was prevented from escaping because of the strength of gravity, (what is described as an Event Horizon - the point beyond which light does not transmit), they always proposed that from that moment all the additional mass that was sucked into the star was also, from that point onwards, always inside that event horizon. But think about that. The event horizon is simply a mathematical point; mass sufficient to prevent light escaping. Thus that mass is always the point where light cannot escape. Adding mass is like trying to pour more coffee into a cup once the cup is full. For once the cup is full, all the additional coffee must be outside of the cup. It is mathematically impossible for the coffee to be added to the cup; same with an event horizon. The event horizon is simply a notional point where gravity is so high, light cannot escape. Beyond that point, all mass must be OUTSIDE of the event horizon and that leads us into a completely new view of the universe. Read it and find out why Steven Hawking has abandoned his theories. http://www.lrsp.com/ebooks.html