Slashdot Mirror


SELEX at Fermilab Discovers New Particle

sellthesedownfalls writes "Scientists at the Department of Energy's Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory will announce on Friday, June 18 the observation of an unexpected new member of a family of subatomic particles called 'heavy-light' mesons. The new meson, a combination of a strange quark and a charm antiquark, is the heaviest ever observed in this family, and it behaves in surprising ways -- it apparently breaks the rules on decaying into other particles. See the Fermilab Press Release."

30 of 259 comments (clear)

  1. Slashdot Reader Discovers New Oxymoron by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Heavy-Light Mesons!

    1. Re:Slashdot Reader Discovers New Oxymoron by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Sounds like my dating experiences. The charming ones are always fat, while the physically attravtive ones are always strange.

    2. Re:Slashdot Reader Discovers New Oxymoron by kfg · · Score: 2, Funny

      The charm quark is "heavy", i.e. relatively massive, while the the strange quark is less so.

      So, in keeping with the lighthearted naming conventions of the 50s and 60s that brought us "charm" and "strange" in the first place (I voted for "Chocolate" and "Maple Walnut" myself), why not just call it the "Laurel and Hardy" Meson?

      KFG

  2. False Alarm by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    My bad, I sneezed into the particle accelerator. Sorry guys.

    1. Re:False Alarm by Tackhead · · Score: 5, Funny
      > The alleged story is indeed mostly true (reference here) although apparently it was two Heineken bottles, and the the theory of how they got there is that it was a prank, not an oversight during construction.

      The story is in an indeterminate state between truth and falsity, and apparently the number of bottles is in an indeterminate state between 1 and 2, and the theory of how they got there is referred to as the Heineken uncertainty principle.

    2. Re:False Alarm by gargleblast · · Score: 2, Funny

      Aha! Heineken touches the particles other beers don't reach.

  3. What, no pictures? by BrianMarshall · · Score: 5, Funny
    The meson lifetime is 10 (-24) seconds, or about the amount of time it takes light to cross a proton.

    Now, I think this is the lifetime of the usual shorter-lived mesons, but still...

    --
    "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro" -- HST
    1. Re:What, no pictures? by athakur999 · · Score: 4, Funny

      I can tell you from personal experience that crossing a proton is a BAD IDEA. Those bastards have a really short temper. I'd say 10(-24) is a pretty conservative estimate of how long it takes to piss a proton off.

      --
      "People that quote themselves in their signatures bother me" - athakur999
    2. Re:What, no pictures? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      (IAAP, btw)

      you know, I wouldn't have guessed from your reply... ;)

    3. Re:What, no pictures? by dgatwood · · Score: 2, Funny
      That's because they always think they're correct.... They're positive....

      --

      Check out my sci-fi/humor trilogy at PatriotsBooks.

  4. strange, charm, rule breaker: by burgburgburg · · Score: 4, Funny
    Now I want to sleep with it.

    I feel so dirty.

    1. Re:strange, charm, rule breaker: by sarah_kerrigan · · Score: 2, Funny

      Hello,

      That'll be the physicists, right?

      Sure. They'll spend all the days trying to evaluate the interaction of SELEX and Burgburgburg. It's no good for their relationship...

      Kisses
      --

      --
      You'd stumble in my footsteps (Depeche Mode, "Walking in my shoes")
  5. Heretics by BearJ · · Score: 5, Funny
    I for one am sick of all these subatomic particles breaking the rules. Surely there must be some sort of law to stop these "dirty hippie" (if you will). They're unconstitutional, and against the american way!

    --
    Stand clear of the doors. The doors are now closing.
    1. Re:Heretics by kfg · · Score: 1, Funny

      Obviously what physicists need to do is give SCO $699 for a research license and a crack pipe.

      KFG

    2. Re:Heretics by Chillum · · Score: 2, Funny

      This reminds me of the answer I gave to a question I once had on a chemistry exam:

      Q: Name two properties of a free radical

      1. Long hair
      2. "Save the Whale" badge

  6. In future times.... by Dark+Paladin · · Score: 1, Funny

    First, let me state that I have the greatest respect for the scientists looking for the secrets of the cosmos, and I eat this shit up like crazy whenever I get the chance. I think it's the greatest stuff ever, and hope that every politician who voted against the Superconducting Supercollider burns in hell forever.

    That said: can you imagine 500 years from now when teachers are in class, getting past Newton and saying "Oh, and then the 20th century when Einstein and Heisenburg had their theories. Remember how we talked about Gallileo dropping objects and measuring the speed? Well, those 20th century guys did that with quantum mechanics. Get this: they smashed subatomic particles together to figure out what they were made of! Here's a picture. Now, stop laughing - and Jimmy, I see your eyes glazed over, stop downloading porn through your bainjack and pay attention."

  7. Obligatory Futurama quote by brainstyle · · Score: 2, Funny

    Farnsworth: It's a single atom of jumbonium. And element so rare, the nucleus alone is worth more than $50,000.

    Bender: How much more?

    Farnsworth: $100,000.

    --
    "Why can't everyone just be straight with me?"
    "Because we live in a bendy world, dear."
  8. Somebody's having a lot of fun at work... by GillBates0 · · Score: 4, Funny
    I don't know what to think of the DsJ+(2632)->Ds(eta)+ and D0K+" meson, but I can tell you these guys have a pretty good thing going for them at their cafetaria.

    Look at what they had for lunch on 06/17:
    Aztec Tortilla Soup
    Hot Italian Sub $4.75
    Chicken Picata $3.75
    Thai Beef $3.75
    Roast Beef Cheddar on Kaiser Roll $4.75
    Beef Strombolis $2.85
    Marinated or Cajun Chicken Caesar Salads $4.75

    It's a wonder they got any work done that day...

    --
    An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
  9. Just as I suspected... by 14erCleaner · · Score: 3, Funny

    It really is turtles all the way down.

    --
    Have you read my blog lately?
  10. They're not so smart... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    "The distribution of the D0 K+ combined mass for all candidates in the data sample including Anti-particle combinations (D0bar K-). There are two clear peaks. The lower, at a mass of 2570 MeV/c2, is the known DsJ(2573) meson, discovered in 1994. This peak's width is more than the detector resolution showing the the "natural width (Gamma)" of this state due to its short lifetime. The value measured for the natural width of 14 MeV/c2 is consistent with previous measurements. The detector resolution is better by a factor of 2 in this D0 K+ decay mode than in the Ds+ eta0 mode making Selex more sensitive to the lifetimes of these state in this decay mode."

    Shit man, I could of told you that.

  11. Break out the Doohan impressions... by GPLDAN · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Cap'n - I think if we reverse the heavy light mesons, we can interuupt the Klingon's charmed anti-quark field just long enuf to escape!"

    Shatner: "Scotty, you only have 60 seconds, hurry!"


    And, BTW, congrats to the Fermi team. I have plenty of friends employed there, I always like to see new discoveries. Good job, guys.

  12. Re:In other news... by DJ+Rubbie · · Score: 5, Funny

    The fire at Los Alamos has had one significant consequence. A secret scientific document was discovered in a bunker whose security systems were mostly destroyed by the fire. This document was leaked to the public last weekend.

    Actually it reveals nothing that we didn't already suspect. But it does show that besides arsenic, lead, mercury, radon, strontium and plutonium, one more extremely deadly and pervasive element is known to exist.

    This startling new discovery has been tentatively named Governmentium (Gv) but kept top secret for 50 years. The new element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0. It does, however, have 1 neutron, 125 deputy neutrons, 75 supervisory neutrons, and 111 team leader neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

    These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, that are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since it has no electrons, Governmentium is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.

    According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Governmentium has a normal half-life of approximately three years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the deputy neutrons, supervisory neutrons, and team leader neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium mass will actually increase over time, since, with each reorganization, some of the morons inevitably become neutrons, forming new isodopes.

    This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as the "Critical Morass."

    http://www.appleseeds.org/governmentium.htm

    --
    Please direct all bug reports to /dev/null
  13. Re:heavy - light? by shigelojoe · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yeah; they're all hole, no donut.

    I tell you, man, this Atkins thing is going *way* too far.

  14. I for one.... by alexborges · · Score: 2, Funny

    ... Wellcome our new subatomic, particle supercharged, dually quarked master

    --
    NO SIG
  15. Don't run afoul of the DMCA by ScooterBill · · Score: 2, Funny

    "It's like watching a water bucket with a large hole and small hole in the bottom," Russ said. "For some reason, the water is pouring out the small hole six times faster than it's coming out of the large one. Something unusual must be going on inside the bucket."

    Doesn't this attempted decryption of the universe break a provision in the DMCA? If that's not applicable, then I'm sure Microsoft will be getting a patent on it any day now.

  16. An adventure... by DrCode · · Score: 4, Funny

    >Look
    You see a meson.
    >Examine meson.
    It's too small for you to see.
    >Examine meson with microscope.
    The meson appears to be composed of too smaller particles, a quark and an antiquark.
    >Examine quark.
    The quark is strange.
    >Examine antiquark.
    The pleasant blue glow leads you to conclude that this is a charmed antiquark.
    >Rub antiquark.
    Your fingers are too big and clumsy.
    >Rub antiquark with cue-tip.
    You suddenly feel lucky.
    Two elf-nymphs enter the room. They look at you expectedly...

  17. Affinity by lildogie · · Score: 2, Funny

    I, myself, am charmed by strangeness.

  18. Is there a Warp Drive here? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    As a taxpayer, I like to know that research will have practical benefits.

    So, if the Fermilab folks could tell us whether this will lead to any or all of the following useful devices, I would greatly appreciate it:

    1) Warp Drive
    2) A way to make all the stars in the galaxy go supernova at once
    3) Bring back all the socks that vanish in the dryer
    4) Mr. Fusion
    5) Flying Cars

  19. Re:No such thing as "breaks the rules" by Stalyn · · Score: 2, Funny

    Godel's theorem related to physics states that there will never exist one set of axioms that will describe every phenomena we encounter. Hawking gave an interesting lecture on Godel and Physics... I'm sure its on the web somewhere.

    --
    The best education consists in immunizing people against systematic attempts at education. - Paul Feyerabend
  20. Re:No such thing as "breaks the rules" by Stalyn · · Score: 2, Funny

    if mathematics can not be axiomized then neither can the laws of physics but sure try it out if you want.

    --
    The best education consists in immunizing people against systematic attempts at education. - Paul Feyerabend