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On The Most Boring Videogames Of All Time
Thanks to 1UP.com for its feature documenting what the writers consider to be the most boring videogames ever. The intro explains the criteria: "These ten games weren't necessarily bad or good -- they were just really, really dull", before pointing to titles like Donkey Kong 64 ("a mediocre platformer bogged down by forty hours of useless doodad-hunting"), King's Field ("It's kind of like an RPG, and it's kind of like an FPS, but mostly it's like falling asleep"), and Aquanaut's Holiday ("...doesn't really have a point -- it's a blocky, dithered simulation of what it's presumably like to go deep sea diving.") What would your pick be?
ok, I don't mean to get nintendo fans mad at me, but I always found the Metroid games very boring. Sure, when you get to explore and fight bosses they're a total blast! But it suffers from something that I believe to be the biggest drag in any video games, backtracking. Even with a pretty face like Metriod Prime, backtracking is still backtracking, and doing things like trudging from one point to get an item or flip a switch, only to have to go back through the same area a dozen times or so doing fetch quests, it get's very old and repetitive.
Theory of flight?! I'll teach you the theory of fist!!
The Great Escape for the C64, a mostly monochromatic (except for the little border around the tiny game screen) simulation of escape from a German concentration camp. During the day, you had to go through the routine of a prisoner or risk being put in solitary. Solitary involved looking at your character in a locked room until the guards let you out. If you didn't touch the joystick for 5 mins, the game took over for you.
I never had the patience to collect all the items and info needed for escape; I think my character just died from boredom.
That's not a soda... it's a caffeine delivery device!
Some of the later (especially superhero-oriented) beat-em-ups on the Sega Genesis were awfully boring.
I eagerly purchased Spider-Man and Venom: Separation Anxiety, expecting it to be as enjoyable as the original Maximum Carnage, but it was drudgery.
The Tick is quite possibly the most boring game ever, with hours and hours of monotonous fighting. "Night of a Million Zillion Ninjas," indeed. Falling into pits and being forced to play the same miniboss/cutscene challenges over and over was worst of all.
Most of the Batman games for Genesis were horrid. Batman Returns had mundane combat, mixed with some absurdly difficult timed jumping. The Adventures of Batman and Robin had extremely boring combat, except that the occasional tit-for-tat enemy who gave as good as he got and required a bit of movement in the vertical plane. Batman Forever had great motion-capture graphics, but frustratingly repetitive combat.
Other bad Genesis beat-em-up games include Captain America and the Avengers, the second X-Men game, and the last 2 16-bit Shinobi games.
You couldn't pay me to play Superman or The Incredible Hulk. I actually used the latter cartridge, along with a broken copy of Sub-Terrania, to prop up my desk hutch during my freshman year of college.
Early Genesis beat-em-ups could be quite fun. I loved the Golden Axe and Streets of Rage series, Altered Beast, and the original Maximum Carnage. I find most of the "good" games to still be playable today.
Well I know that it is not always true that "worst = most boring".
But, Barbie for the C64 can definitely qualify for both! Get this:
Ken calls Barbie, asks, "Would you like to go to dinner?". She says "sure", and he replies, "Great! Pick you up in an hour." So she drives around and goes shopping for clothes for dinner, gets her hair done, etc.
Ken calls back, "Barbie, plans have changed! Would you like to go to the prom? Pick you up in an hour." She drives, shops, Barbisizes some more.
However, when she gets home, Ken is again indecisive: "Barbie plans have changed! Want to go to the movies? Pick you up in an hour"
Finally Ken makes up his f*ckin mind and they goto whatever final destination he chose after Barbie has spent several hours answering to his every whim!
Not only is this the worst game, but what does this teach our children? To be ready for whatever demands Ken makes, not having any input for the decision, and making unreallistic demands like getting ready for "a Prom" in an hour?!?