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Cleansing Hardware Of Dead Pig Odors?
Chagatai writes "My company is one of America's largest beef and pork producers. Recently I took a trip to see a new computer room that had been built at one of our abbatoirs. While the new environment is nice and sanitary, the old computer room had air intakes that were adjacent to the rendering portion of the plant, and everything smells in an almost unholy way. Management is curious if there are any cleaning agents or means of deodorizing this equipment before moving it into the nice, new office. The only products I could find would clean the outside of the hardware, but the internals would still possess the lovely aroma of boiled dead pig parts. Of course, this is a race against time, as I am sure someone will inevitably squirt Pine-Sol into the system to try to make things better. Does anyone have any recommendations to remove the effluvium of post-mortem porcine matter from our machines?"
You're missing a prime chance to pull a real stunt.
One word: Ebay.
Put it all up for auction simultaneously, and watch the fun as people get their newly won purchases. I'd love to read that feedback. "Great PowerEdge, but I've never had computer equipment smell unholy before." And then, watch mass psychology at work as people read each other's feedback from the same vendor and start to put two and two together.
The only thing funnier would be to work at Paypal and hear people squirm as they try to justify asking for a refund. "You gotta believe me, this disk array smells bad. Really bad. Like dead meat bad."
What's your damage, Heather?
Bravo.
Ryan T. Sammartino
"Ancora imparo"
Guess it's time for 3M to create a solvent version of Fluorinert.
Actually, you've got a great (albeit expensive) single-machine solution right there: run the machine in a tub of Fluorinert. Presto, no smell is going to escape that liquid.
Wouldn't work for a data center, unless of course you wanted to run it inside a pool and send your techs in with scuba gear. And at that point, you might as well just run the data center in a normal room - but send the techs in with scuba gear, and they won't smell the funky servers because they'll be wearing scuba gear.
What's your damage, Heather?
If you can't come up with a solution, I suggest donating the equipment to PETA...
You can't talk about Wikipedia's flaws on Wikipedia
He also had sticky keys from God knows what
Hmmmm...
*scratches chin*
Free XBox, PS2
Gives new meaning to the phrase Render Farm, now doesn't it?
Why not indeed.
Whenever I encounter a system that smells of dead meat I just wipe it & install linux.
-- MarkusQ
P.S. for the humour impared: this is a joke.
Wow, this will be a great article for the trolls. You're sure to see a lot of ridiculous posts here.
You're also probably going to get a lot of serious suggestions about rubbing alcohol and vapor-based cleaning. These are likely to help, but not do it 100%, and they require either a lot of labor or shipping everything to an expensive cleaning company.
So let me tell you what did where I was working several years back. I was working with the FBI, on a special mission in Russia to help their law enforcement agencies upgrade security in former nuclear weapons facilities. Now, it wouldn't surprise anyone to hear that a certain facility that will remain unnamed, somewhere in the middle of Siberia, only a day or two's drive from a certain site of civil war, had an incident that wasn't properly cleaned up. We arrived at the main computer lab to find a dozen corpses that had been there for a year and a half. And despite the Siberain weather that can freeze spit before it hits the ground, the bodies in the bunker hadn't been frozen.
After getting a couple new gas masks for the guys that really should've skipped lunch before going down there, we discovered that the computers were overrun with, well, you don't want to know. Let's just say it was fuzzy and came in colors I'd never seen before. Even after the room was disinfected nobody could stand to go down there without a mask. Though one of the Russians suggested using it as a gas chamber to execute criminals, until we briefed him on the Geneva Convention. But we couldn't just throw the machines away-they included supercomputers and large clusters full of nuclear weapons research. The science team had to go through all of it with a fine-toothed comb.
So what did we do? Simple-seal everything off! We too a bunch of plastic covers and created an airtight seal around all the computers, with only monitors, keyboards, and mice outside. A ventilation system pumped cold air into the huge computer tent. It was ugly as hell, but worked quite effectively.
So, if your offices don't mind having interior decorating issues, a bunch of strong plastic, industrial glue, and lots of duct tape can solve the problem. Until somebody want to upgrade or do maintenance, of course. God help that poor bastard.
Really, it's the only way. Nothing smells quite like a rendering plant and nothing gets it out. That smell is composed of volatile hydrocarbons which come out of the meat when it's cooked, and they get into anything porous -- even the surfaces of "solid" plastics. Insulation, wood, sheetrock, and even plastic that has been around that smell for any length of time will have that distinctive smell forever.
Brackets contain world's first nanosig, highly magnified:[.]
Wow, this will be a great article for the trolls. You're sure to see a lot of ridiculous posts here. . . . I was working with the FBI, on a special mission in Russia . . .
LOL. Okay, that was ridiculous. Nice troll - the guy that modded it insightful is probably out waxing his Yugo now.
Let me try. There is no way you're going to rid the equipment of the stench unless you sacrifice a PETA member and cremate the remains in the room with the equipment. The smoky holiness will counteract the "unholy" residue mentioned. It works doubly well if the PETA member is a virgin. The only side-effect is that all subsequent users of the equipment will become politicized vegetarians (well, that and the ashes all over everything).
Wouldn't it be 99% poison?
Analogies don't equal equalities, they are merely somewhat analogous.
You make your own soap?
I think we need to swap recipes. I've got some other things you might be interested in.
E-mail me a tylerdurden@aol.com
Hope to hear from you soon.
I've seen the commercials. The drugs in that stuff keep people opening their closets for another snort until they faint and fall over.
One line blog. I hear that they're called Twitters now.
You may be stuck with the stench. OK, random bad jokes : give them to PETA/ADL/vegan society. Give them to Cowboy Neal, no one will notice them over his stench.
;)
Let's not forget, if you bring them to a tightly packed LAN party, no one can tell the difference between the addicted gamers and the PCs that reek of rotting pig parts
Join the TWIT army now!
Sorry, but...I'm going to have to ask. Are you the guy who bought all the Heaven's Gate computers at police auction?
Anything to do with receiving a shipment of 16,000 lbs. of distilled hardened fatty acid?
I did receive a fax at work for shipment of just such cargo, I think they just faxed it to the wrong number. But just to freak people out I did print it out and stick it on a coworkers desk with a note that said, "Tonight, we make soap!"
He was more than a little freaked out. But I never received the soap. Or did I...
... pork whiskers! Eventually the hardware will fritz out due to the accumulated pork whiskers and you'll have to replace it anyway. Problem solved.
I'd have a personalized plate on my car, but "toxic bachelor" won't fit into 7 letters.