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Automated Sentry Robots

jimbob5 writes "New Scientist reports that you can now buy your own automated Room Defender. 'Who would like this gift? Any child, or anyone who saw the director's cut of Aliens and dreamed of owning one of those automated sentries.'" The New Scientist gift guide looks pretty useful.

19 of 216 comments (clear)

  1. I can see it now. by Le+Marteau · · Score: 5, Funny

    Once triggered, it issues a verbal warning then fires a warning shot (a foam disc).

    Oh yeah. I can see it now. How long before someone bolts their .357 to the thing, rigs up a solenoid trigger-puller set up to activate when the "foam discs" are supposed to launch.

    Jehovah's witnesses might have something to worry about.

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    1. Re:I can see it now. by billysielu · · Score: 4, Funny

      what sort of pansy alien gets stopped by foam discs?!

      --
      -Mike Whitehurst www.mike-whitehurst.co.uk
  2. I'm too late! by ArmageddonLord · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I've wanted to build one of these things for years. However my goals were a little higher. Complete motion tracking camera/servo system, and it would have fired paintballs or airsoft BBs... Too bad I never thought of the downgrade to common toy as a great selling point. Guess I'm and engineer and not a businessman.

    1. Re:I'm too late! by stuktongue · · Score: 4, Interesting
  3. Exit the room or there will be... trouble! by mfh · · Score: 5, Funny

    I want this! But I won't get it. We have a little one running around and I can see what would happen some early morning around 4am...

    "Mommy, Daddy... I had a bad dream!"

    "Exit the room or there will be... trouble!" (fires warning shots, 1/4 payload)

    "AAAAARGGGGHHH!!!!! A MONSTER!!!!!" (flees, heavily pelted by nerf discs)

    "You were warned! Have a good day and stay out of... trouble."

    "ZZzzzzZZZzzZZZZZzzzZZZ" (mom & dad (in unison))

    "Waaaaaaahhhhhh" (cries to sleep)

    On second thought... that could make for some interesting Skinner experiments where we actually get to sleep for a whole night! Although the little one might not get to sleep at all, living in fear of the menacing turret monster. Hey maybe this could breed a new form of learned Tourette's Syndrome?? I mean what else is going to happen after being pelted by a nerf turret living in your parent's room for your whole childhood, until all you can do is swear randomly. (all the moderators with Tourette's are going to love this comment... can you imagine their reaction??? At least they won't be able to mod this down -- for a while)

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    1. Re:Exit the room or there will be... trouble! by pete-classic · · Score: 5, Funny
      On second thought... that could make for some interesting Skinner experiments where we actually get to sleep for a whole night! Although the little one might not get to sleep at all, living in fear of the menacing turret monster.


      What an age we live in, where people try to automate traumatizing their kids.

      Listen, save the money you'd spend on this thing and just beat the hell out of the kid every time he comes to your room.

      I recommend a belt.

      -Peter
  4. Lame by pmbuko · · Score: 5, Insightful

    All you have to do is train your dog to sit/stay obediently, then get him to take the shots for you until the ammo runs out. You're free to pillage the room unmolested after that.

    1. Re:Lame by drinkypoo · · Score: 5, Funny

      All you have to do is walk up and watch the foam discs bounce harmlessly off of your legs, then pillage the room. Get back to me when someone is selling one of these that launches shuriken or sharpened AOL CDs.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
  5. I've had one of these for a while... by Rude+Turnip · · Score: 5, Funny

    I have an earlier model. The biggest change is that instead of shooting discs, it howls and then poops on the carpet.

  6. Overreaction. by mr_spatula · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This isn't impressive.

    If it said anything about actually TRACKING the target, I'd be impressed.

    As it is, it appears to be little more than a light sensor attatched to a rapid-fire nerf gun. i.e. Dumb-fire, no aiming.

    If it says otherwise, I'd love to know... but I saw nothing to indicate that.

    1. Re:Overreaction. by Stone316 · · Score: 4, Funny
      Jeez, come on.. it only costs 40 bucks... For the system most of us geeks would like to have it would be:

      1. cost about 500 bucks.
      2. be lethal or at least be capable of inflicting injury.
      3. Illegal (unless you live in Texas).

      --
      "Thanks to the remote control I have the attention span of a gerbil."
  7. What about EMP? by DeepFried · · Score: 4, Funny

    I was going to get one of these but then realized it wouldnt take long for wife wife to figure out how to disable it with an EMP grenade.

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    Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my hard disk?
  8. Defending my own room... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    ....wouldn't be as fun as liberating my sister's room. I want a unilateral robot room liberator/democracy imposer.

  9. Re:I got to get one for the cubicle by 3770 · · Score: 4, Funny

    You seem to be at conflict with your boss. Have you ever tried watching porn together? It should bring the two of you closer together.

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  10. All Fun Now but... by Laoping · · Score: 5, Funny

    What happens when the super intelligent monkeys get their hands on these? Seriously people, we can defeat the monkeys and we can defeat the robots, but not at the same time!!!!!

  11. Slashdot PPV by DeepFried · · Score: 4, Insightful

    She will likely have to defeat my current wife in combat first...

    That's a great idea! We can oil them both up and broadcast it live. The first ever Slashdot Pay-Per-View.

    BTW the first yahoo to make the "Broad-cast" pun gets a -1 mod.

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    Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my hard disk?
  12. Chasing cats away, true story by 3770 · · Score: 4, Interesting

    So,

    My parents had a flower bed that the neighbourhood cats used as their litter box.

    Dad got fed up with that and built a little contraption.

    He rigged up a booby trap with a wire and a clothes peg. When the cats tripped the wire the clothes peg pulled off and broke a circuit with a battery and one of those old style magnesium flashes that one used to have for cameras in the 70s.

    So the cats would walk in there at night, with pupils dilated to the size of grapes and preparing to do their business.

    And trip the wire and.... *flash*!!!

    The wire got tripped a few times. Once per cat in the area I would presume. And then never again.

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  13. Re:Target tracking? by pclminion · · Score: 4, Funny
    Maybe a 5-quadrant motion detector would work pretty sweet. Although it might be pretty slow.

    I can't quite put my finger on it, but something seems odd about the term "5-quadrant."

  14. Re:Saw Blades by Anonymous+Writer · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'm getting me one and modifying it so it shoots saw blades instead of foam disks. Ain't NOBODY getting near my stack of porn!

    Be very careful if you're going to be setting up shooting blades around your stack of porn. If there's any chance you forget to deactivate it when you're "in the mood", with all the blood out of your brain, you may accidentally "disable" yourself from ever using your porn again.