Slashdot Mirror
In Korea, Email Is Only For Old People
_martini_ writes "This short article suggests that, in Korea, email is used only for formal communications, or by older, less tech-saavy generations, while IMs, blogs, and SMS has taken over as the primary means of day to day messages."
Noted Internet fatass cowboyneal has a new reason to eat a pound of ground beef, only this time it is not deep fried in corn batter and surrounded by curly fries. No, on a routine trip to Carl's jr. he tells me that he discovered the low carb six dollar burger purely by accident, originally thinking of it as a way to eat more fat and not be filled with bread. It became more of an obsession than linux douchebaggery. The psychological heirarchy of needs is proven once again.
Instead of his normal deep fried vegetable fat intake this is animal fat, something that feeds the carnal nature of all man. It is also the main stay of one of the most popular low-carb diet crazes to hit the market. The atkin's nutritional approach is driven not by a lower fat intake, or a particularly low caloric intake but rather high protein and high fat in the initial stages of the diet, it is safe to continue induction for up to six months. This induction phase is what cowboyneal had stumbled upon.
GNAA reporter GuyNiguere questioned Carl's jr. employee and undercover informant JesuitX about cowboyneal's visits to the fast food chain. Upon questioning JesuitX pulled his 2-foot nigger cock out of the mayonnaise vat and began cursing the franchise owner and anyone who looked like that "chink Korean penny pinching assface with the black heart of a Jew banker foreclosing on a struggling rural family in western Nebraska". Having never actually answered any questions GuyNiguere decided to stake the restaurant out him self. These are the findings of the stake out:
GuyNiguere, stake out report. Day 1
After a morning of no relevant activity I believe I have hit the motherlode so to speak, after feeling several small tremors and noticing the scent of burning pork and Marlboro light cigarettes he appeared. This magnificent behemoth of a man resembling a pasty white pre-surgery Al Roker genetically crossed with a tokyox hog. I knew at once it was the unspeakable, the terrible, the unimaginable, CowBoyNeal. After slipping on his own sweat and having three employees with a hand truck prop him up at the counter he proceeded to order fourteen low-carb six-dollar burgers. Enough beef to feed the children of an entire AOL call center.
I feel I must talk to this incredible beast but the crunch of burger wrappers and commotion of Carl's jr. employees is just too much for me. Today has been a momentous day, and I would love to get the story first hand from the man, but surely his failing eyesight, latent racism, and my natural nigger tendencies to wear bright colors could mean certain death. Perhaps tomorrow, I need to regain my strength.
The GNAA reporter had every right to be afraid, for the next day he attempted to talk to the infamous butterball and was likely savagely devoured much to the amazement of the GNAA. Always the forward thinker he decided to use his stolen laptop to broadcast the interview live via irc. This shocking moment in slashdot/gnaa relations is both disturbing and enlightening.
GuyNiguere: I'm here with cowboyneal, I am about to go ask him about his weight loss, I may die, but to leave this world in service of the GNAA is the most noble way to go.
GuyNiguere: Cowboyneal, I see you've lost a lot of weight, how did you manage to do it?
GuyNiguere: He says that I look tasty and that he has lost almost a quarter of his weight 475 lbs. so far by simply eating nothing more than six-dollar burgers dripping with ranch dressing.
GuyNiguere: How did you notice the weight loss, forgive me but a quarter of your weight isn't all that much in the scope of things.
GuyNiguere: He says the first indication was when his wife found his penis and he's been pumping the porker ever since she figured out how to support his cockapron with a pneumatic cylinder.
GuyNiguere: How has your new diet changed your life?
GuyNiguere: He said I look like I'm made of tasty nigger meat and that it has allow
fp
hahahaha
You certainly sound like a dude. Are you a dyke?
North Korea's primary means of domestic communication are still starvation and threats of summary execution.
As opposed to Texas where the primary means of communication are the last dinner before getting the electric chair.
NetBSD Confirms It: Old People Are Dying
Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered community of old people when recently IDC confirmed that old people account for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all people. Coming on the heels of the latest Netcraft survey which plainly states that more old people have died this year, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along: old people are collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by dead of Yassir Arafat.
You don't need to be a Kreskin [amazingkreskin.com] to predict the future of old people. The hand writing is on the wall: old people face a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for old people because old people are dying. Things are looking very bad for old people. As many of us are already aware, old people continue to die. Red ink flows like a river of blood. Old men from Dafur are the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of their all.
All major surveys show that steadily increasing amounts of old people die. Old people are very old and their long term survival prospects are very dim. Old people continue to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save them at this point in time. For all practical purposes, old people are dead.
Fact: Old people are dying