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DOE Report on Cold Fusion

Posted by samzenpus on from the mr.-fusion dept.

thhamm writes "The DOE Report on Cold Fusion (mentioned here too) is out. Take a look at it on the DOE Website. Well, looks like there is nothing really new since Pons & Fleischmann in 1989, because "While significant progress has been made in the sophistication of calorimeters since the review of this subject in 1989, the conclusions reached by the reviewers today are similar to those found in the 1989 review.""

16 of 368 comments (clear)

  1. Can't be more appropriate by fembots · · Score: 5, Funny

    Finally, a news that is "Nothing for you to see here. Please move along.".

    --
    Rock that crushes, Paper & Scissors that don't matter.
  2. ColdFusion? by ponds · · Score: 5, Funny

    Only old koreans use cold fusion. Everyone else has moved to J2EE and then LAMP

    1. Re:ColdFusion? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      In Soviet Russia, the jokes get tired of you!

    2. Re:ColdFusion? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      this joke is already very, very old. ...in Japan!

    3. Re:ColdFusion? by noidentity · · Score: 2, Funny

      If this new Korean spin on the Soviet Russia joke is going to take hold, it needs to be used carefully. That means using it sparingly at first, and getting the wording just right:

      In Korea, only old people <do/use/are something>.

      So in this case, it would be

      In Korea, only old people use cold fusion.

      or perhaps

      In Korea, only old people are pedantic.

  3. Pfff by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I've been using Coldfusion for years.

    1. Re:Pfff by WindBourne · · Score: 2, Funny

      Sadly, it is still questionable if it works right.

      --
      I prefer the "u" in honour as it seems to be missing these days.
  4. Slashdot story summary gets it right by Dancin_Santa · · Score: 4, Funny

    Nothing for you to see here. Please move along.

    How about the Department of Fish and Game releasing their report on Bigfoot? That coming soon?

  5. I'm sorry by k4_pacific · · Score: 4, Funny

    DOE!
    Oh dear!
    Cold fusion here! /ducks

    --
    Unknown host pong.
  6. Surprise! by WisconsinFusion · · Score: 5, Funny

    Actually, that was the second draft. I believe the first draft read: "Despite committing some of the best minds in Physics to the task, we seem to have been one-uped by a bunch of chemists who clearly know more about energy than the er, Department formerly known as 'Energy.' We apologize for wasting tax payer money." "Ok guys, shut those experiments down. Steve got cold fusion. Turns out that the reaction only occurs in people's basements." Damn. Time for a career change. -WF

  7. Titanium foil hats by Psionicist · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... to provide evidence for low energy nuclear reactions. These experiments involved low energy deuterium beams impinging on deuterium loaded metal foils such as titanium.

    In moments like these I'm glad I bought the tin foil hat and not the more luxurious titanium one.

  8. [critical subject] by Zarf · · Score: 4, Funny

    [comment on research]

    [faulty logic]

    [hope for future advancement]

    --
    [signature]
  9. Thank god for cold fusion by Striker770S · · Score: 3, Funny

    all i could think of was the wonderfully done cinimatic on Starcraft where they open up the case to the bomb, and they have a bunch of beer cans being kept cool by cold fusion. Of course the beers would be completely frozen, but a funny cinimatic nontheless...

    --
    I thought what I'd do was, I'd pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes. - Catcher in the Rye
  10. excerpts since server overloaded by iggymanz · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Two-thirds of the reviewers commenting on Charge Element 1 did not feel the evidence was conclusive for low energy nuclear reactions, one found the evidence convincing, and two disappeared in a pair of 340 kiloton thermonuclear blasts"

  11. There's Still Hope! by Shafe · · Score: 3, Funny

    Well, I guess we're out of luck for cold fusion, so now let's all throw our support to zero point energy! Come on, Tesla believed in it! And he invented the radio and alternating current!

  12. Re:What a nothing document. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    > ... get a more accurate view of the conclusions reached by the reviewers.

    Uh, you are new around here, right?