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Amazon Offers 2-Day Shipping For $79/Year

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the that's-actually-tempting dept.

stevejsmith writes "Amazon.com has announced their Amazon Prime service. For $79, you get free two-day shipping on all items, upgradeable to overnight shipping for $3.99 per item. The offer applies to most media (books, DVDs, CDs, etc.) and can be shared among "up to four family members living in the same household." Apparently the only way they will enforce this family-only sharing clause is by mandating that your "family members" know your birthday."

20 of 325 comments (clear)

  1. Amazon Prime? by American+AC+in+Paris · · Score: 5, Funny

    Unless it can transform from a tractor-trailer into a bow-wielding vixen, I'm not interested.

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    Obliteracy: Words with explosions

    1. Re:Amazon Prime? by American+AC+in+Paris · · Score: 2, Funny
      I'm not sure I want my bow-weilding vixens to be transforming into tractor-trailers anyway...

      ...but think all the double entendre fun you could have!

      "Wait 'till you get inside! Cozy, yet surprisingly roomy!"
      "I'm into leather. Heated seats, too..."
      "It's very pleasant in the rear--I could spend all day there!"
      "I enjoy sex with motor vehicles!"

      (uh--scratch that last one.)

      --

      Obliteracy: Words with explosions

  2. Amazon Prime? by techsoldaten · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does Amazon Prime compete with Optimus for leadership of the Autobots?

    Perhaps he is the UPS truck to Optimus's tractor trailer?

    M

  3. Uh Oh by nightterror · · Score: 5, Funny

    Im in enough trouble trying to remember my wifes birthday as it is....

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    Photons have mass!!?? I didn't even know they were Catholic...
  4. silly by AtariAmarok · · Score: 4, Funny

    ....it is tech news because someone could use Amazon to order a TI Graphing calculator. Silly question.

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    Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
  5. Know my birthday? by FingerDemon · · Score: 4, Funny

    Well, that eliminates my family from participating.

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    "Contrarily the lookaside buffer might not be the panacea... "
  6. That would never work! by Mr+Guy · · Score: 4, Funny

    No, because you'd have to tell them all your birthday! See? It's FOOLPROOF.

    Erm... Yeah... Nevermind.

    --
    Never confuse volume with power.
  7. WTF?? "For $79, you get free" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny
    For $79, you get free

    It's amazing how marketing has managed to distort the English language. Hey, I'll work for Free/Hr.

    1. Re:WTF?? "For $79, you get free" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Note that the $79.00 "Free" can be upgraded for $3.99

    2. Re:WTF?? "For $79, you get free" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny
      Ever gone college hunting?

      Yup - landed one too. But once we got it home, we couldn't figure out how to cook it. It was easy to catch - we used cases of beer for bait.

  8. This should be in shop.slashdot.org by GillBates0 · · Score: 4, Funny

    News for Shoppers. Ways to save.

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    An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
  9. Peer review by October_30th · · Score: 3, Funny
    Hey, I submitted the above story. How come mine didn't get posted?

    As everybody here knows, Slashdot adheres to a strict peer review standard for each and every one of the submitted stories. It is just impossible that your story would be rejected unfairly.

    Ok. Maybe that was just a dream I had last night.

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    The owls are not what they seem
    1. Re:Peer review by Reignking · · Score: 5, Funny

      Re-submit in two days. I'm sure they'll repost it.

      --
      One man's Funny is another man's Offtopic.
  10. Shhhhh! by winkydink · · Score: 5, Funny

    You're not supposed to do the math!

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    "I'd rather be a lightning rod than a seismometer." -Ken Kesey

    1. Re:Shhhhh! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Anything that screws over walmart is good in my book :)

      Huh? Let's see drive to walmart get widget for $3 in an 20-30 minutes (commute + checkout time) or pay $2 and wait 2 days for it to be shipped to me? I think I'll go to walmart instead. Personally, anything that walmart crushes is good in my book :)

  11. Amazon Prime? by Have+Blue · · Score: 2, Funny

    Was anyone else expecting a first-person adventure game based on the venerable Amazon series?

  12. Re:Free shipping is the way to go on big ticket it by GigsVT · · Score: 2, Funny

    And wouldn't it have made more sense to just buy a wedding dress at the first store they went to, even if it cost $400 more? :)

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    I've had enough abrasive sigs. Kittens are cute and fuzzy.
  13. Re:Work address by TheViffer · · Score: 5, Funny
    Who cares.

    I can go buy my 1300 pound shipped JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank happly knowing that shipping will run me $79!

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    -- Knowing too much can get you killed, but knowing who knows too much can make you rich.
  14. Great... by dmarx · · Score: 3, Funny

    Now I can't tell any non-family my birthday without Amazon suing me for breaking their copy protection.

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    "Do I dare disturb the universe?"
  15. Re:Not a bad deal if you always want it NOW by captaincucumber · · Score: 2, Funny

    I'm compulsive too, and I discovered this place called "a store". All you have to do is drive there, and you get your stuff immediately, not in 2 days. Shipping is free.