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Windows Cluster Edition

Posted by Zonk on from the supercomputing-through-the-window dept.

eth8686 writes "Microsoft is aiming to have its first cluster version of Windows ready in time for a supercomputing conference this fall." From the article: "The next version of the Compute Cluster edition will extend to Microsoft's .Net programming infrastructure, letting developers write software using the C# programming language, he said."

25 of 438 comments (clear)

  1. Slogan by nocomment · · Score: 5, Funny

    a thousand blue screens a thousand times faster!

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    /* oops I accidentally made a comment, sorry */
    /* http://allyourbasearebelongto.us */
    1. Re:Slogan by Anti_zeitgeist · · Score: 3, Funny

      wow, imagine a biowu.....err...nevermind.

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      If it wasn't for C, we would be stuck using BASI, PASAL and OBOL.
    2. Re:Slogan by st1d · · Score: 4, Funny

      How about:

      MS puts the 'F' in ClusterF@#&

      Sorry Mods, couldn't help myself. :)

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      Microsoft has just released their much anticipated hands-free cordless mouse. Warning, it may hurt a little at first.
    3. Re:Slogan by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 5, Funny

      OMG, your right,
      Nasa have just released a View of the cluster in operation from space.

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      liqbase :: faster than paper
    4. Re:Slogan by A+beautiful+mind · · Score: 4, Funny

      Biowulf? Microsoft has nothing to do with bio stuff!

      They are the borg, remember?!

      --
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      Be yourself no matter what they say
    5. Re:Slogan by ackthpt · · Score: 5, Funny
      a thousand blue screens a thousand times faster!

      'I felt a great disturbance in the force. As though millions of voices cried out in terror, and then suddenly silenced.'

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    6. Re:Slogan by pilgrim23 · · Score: 5, Funny

      actually whe using Windows the word "cluster" has Always come to mind, but is usually followed by another word.

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    7. Re:Slogan by Nikker · · Score: 5, Funny

      But imagine how fast the cards bounce when you win a game on solitare!!!!

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      A loop, by its nature, continues. If that didn't make sense, start reading this sentence again.
    8. Re: Slogan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Imagine the licence fees required to run a Beowulf cluster of those!

  2. Karma to Burn so.... by FerretFrottage · · Score: 5, Funny

    Windows Cluster Fuck Edition?

    There, it's been said.

    --
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  3. Oh boy... by what_the_frell · · Score: 5, Funny

    Imagine having to reboot a whole cluster after the BSOD.

  4. Imagine.. by tarquin_fim_bim · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... Beosloth cluster of those.

  5. Image a.... by reality-bytes · · Score: 5, Funny



    Imagine a Beowulf cluster of........

    No, wait, it's just too terrible to comprehend.

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    Ripping an new rectum in the fabric of spacetime.
  6. But... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    does it run Linux?

  7. Cluster...? by joranbelar · · Score: 4, Funny
    "Microsoft is aiming to have its first cluster version of Windows ready in time for a supercomputing conference this fall."

    Every edition of Windows I've ever tried has been a pretty reliable cluster-f*ck, where's the news here ;)

  8. How Amazingly Unuseful by Foofoobar · · Score: 5, Funny

    Let's see... half the resources, twice the security risk and ten times the price???

    Where do I sign up to throw my IT budget down the drain?

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    This is my sig. There are many like it but this one is mine.
  9. Finally fixed the message passing interface... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...which is what they built DBSOD (Distributed Blue Screen of Death) on top of. You can't call it windows without BSOD. DBSOD over MPI finally gives windows customers what they've been waiting for.

  10. Re:On topic beowulf Windows cluster jokes? by Stevyn · · Score: 4, Funny

    Too bad there aren't any "I'd hate to be the guy calling up Microsoft to activate all those copies of windows" jokes.

    But if there were, "I'd hate to be the guy calling up Microsoft to activate all those copies of windows"

  11. Out of Academia by anocelot · · Score: 5, Funny

    It references the original "coming out" article which states:

    "We see the market transitioning out of academic and government (areas) and into the enterprise," Oldroyd said. "As that move happens, you'll find that people need to have a familiar interface. They're not interested in tuning it and tweaking it. They want to get their work done."

    So now I'm curious... Are they selling to managers, who use the windows i/f and want to think they can "get the job done" on the new server cluster? Or are they trying to suggest that no one in corp uses un*x systems?

    I think what Microsoft really needs to do is come up with a line of kitchen appliances. I for one would buy them. I mean, hey, maybe then I could learn how to cook! Imagine having the same interface on the fridge and the coffee maker! Oh sure, some whiny liberal will probably complain that they don't NEED the percolate button for their ice cream, but this is America! Choice is what made this country great!

    Note: /. may edit out the

    <sarcasm>
    tags.
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  12. Sorry by rafael_es_son · · Score: 3, Funny

    But did i read "Custard Edition"?

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    HAD
  13. aaaha! by atari2600 · · Score: 4, Funny

    *Sits back*

    In Soviet Russia, M...ahh fuck it.

    Imagine a Beow...bah never mind

    BAHAHAHAHAA - Cluster...baaahhahah - oh you guys are serious - Sorry :(

  14. Quoted: by Jozer99 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Quoted: "We have developed Windows for Clusters for those computers with significant processing power, but not enough to run Longhorn" a Microsoft spokesperson said.

  15. Sneak Peek... by c0l0 · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...at the development lab already running it!

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    :%s/Open Source/Free Software/g

    YTARY!
  16. Re:What is the point? by marcello_dl · · Score: 5, Funny

    Touche'.

    Imagine a beowulf cluster of product activation procedures...

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  17. Activation is the problem by zecg · · Score: 3, Funny

    Someone is going to spend a lot of time on the telephone dictating license numbers to activate an entire cluster...

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