Apple Hires DVD Jon

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Posted by Zonk on Friday April 1, 2005 @10:33AM from the good-job dept.

ack154 writes "As the article says, 'If you can't beat them, hire them.' TechTree.com is reporting that Apple has recently hired DVD Jon. I guess Apple has had enough cracks of their iTunes program and have decided to stop it at the source. And give the source a job."

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a special message. by ShaniaTwain · 2005-04-01 10:34 · Score: 5, Funny

Nothing for you to see here. Please move along.

almost sums up slashdot today huh?

--
Starsucks
1. Re:a special message. by Stevyn · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  I think it's funnier how everyone is freaking out because of the April Fools jokes. It's one damn day out of the year. Enjoy it! Tomorrow we can go back to bashing Microsoft and software patents.
2. Re:a special message. by ShaniaTwain · 2005-04-01 10:38 · Score: 1
  
  Yeah, I know thats the over-all joke today, It would be funnier if it was harder to tell the joke stories from the true.. I do think they should keep up this posting rate from now on though. they've set our expectations very high on this special day.
  
  --
  Starsucks
3. Re:a special message. by aixou · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 1
  
  The funniest part is that Slashdot is just acting as an aggregate to all the lame April fools jokes on tech sites across the web.
  So, Slashdot has become like a neutron star of lameness today.
4. Re:a special message. by kabocox · 2005-04-01 10:51 · Score: 1
  
  I think it's funnier how everyone is freaking out because of the April Fools jokes.
  
  That's because you are used to getting tech news at places other than slashdot. I've gotten to depend on /. on by in tech news. Do you have any idea how annoy April 1 is here? If I had another site that I got good tech news from, I wouldn't even bother checking here for the whole week of April 1. Tomorrow, we get the dups. I really need to find a better tech news source.
5. Re:a special message. by gnarlin · 2005-04-01 10:52 · Score: 1
  
  Please, please, please, please! STOP.
  This flood of irritating april fools is already making me gag.
  That's it! I'm ofFicially going to bed and when I wake up it
  bloody better not be april's fools day anymore!
  
  GOODNIGHT!
  {*SLAM*}
  
  --
  A bad analogy is like a leaky screwdriver.
6. Re:a special message. by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:59 · Score: 0
  
  Paging Bill Murray.
  
  Huuuzaaah!
Dear GOD by BJZQ8 · 2005-04-01 10:34 · Score: 2, Funny

We've had it with the April Fools Stuff...It stopped being funny at noon, remember?
1. Re:Dear GOD by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  It was funny before noon?
2. Re:Dear GOD by daveo0331 · 2005-04-01 10:37 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  It is still before noon on Midway Island.
  
  --
  Remember the days when Republicans were the party of fiscal responsibility?
3. Re:Dear GOD by Short+Circuit · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 1
  
  You should try being a subscriber. As I write this, there's eight articles posted in the "Mysterious Future."
  
  I think they just decided to queue up the articles, and take the day off.
  
  --
  tasks(723) drafts(105) languages(484) examples(29106)
I just finish a comment... by nsasch · 2005-04-01 10:34 · Score: 1

and here's a new post! How many people are sending in jokes, there's no way editors could come up with garbage so fast!

--
Make your computer faster: rm -rf /mnt/windows/
On joke day by Kipsaysso · 2005-04-01 10:34 · Score: 1

They dupe.

Amazing

--
This is another way of starting a sig with this and ending it with that.
1. Re:On joke day by mrchapp · 2005-04-01 11:34 · Score: 1
  
  They dupe.
  Amazing
  
  You must be new here.
  http://slashdot.org/index.pl?issue=20030401
  Welcome
4 minutes? by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 0

Stop it. You can't even get to today's morning stories anymore.
Wow, Slashdot is so funny! by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 0

Golly these April Fools Jokes are so great! I *never* get tired of reading them! I'm rolling in the aisle slashdot, keep 'em comin... you janitors are really earning your salary today!
That's it by Concerned+Onlooker · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 2, Funny

No more Slashdot for me today. See you tomorrow.

--
http://www.rootstrikers.org/
1. Re:That's it by T'hain+Esh+Kelch · 2005-04-01 10:48 · Score: 0
  
  Unfortunately it IS tomorrow for me! These has been posted April 2. in Europe... :/
2. Re:That's it by Nivoset · 2005-04-01 11:14 · Score: 1
  
  so long, and thanks for all the fish
  
  --
  Movies made by a crazy person
  
  http://www.youtube.com/marginalpro
Make it stop by sterno · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 2, Funny

The april fool's jokes burn!!! The goggles do nothing!!!

--
This sig has been temporarily disconnected or is no longer in service
1. Re:Make it stop by Knetzar · 2005-04-01 14:35 · Score: 1
  
  Wow, I thought you were making a bad pun. I read that line as, "The googles do nothing!!!"
Good God by ManicGiraffe · 2005-04-01 10:35 · Score: 1

Didn't even bother to do a good PS on the iPod.

Slash is becoming a Fark thread for the day...
Despite this being a joke by jockeys · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 4, Interesting

I think it's a damn good idea. If only more companies would utilize talented guys (or girls) like Jon, think of what could be accomplished.

--

In Soviet Russia jokes are formulaic and decidedly non-humorous.
dear god by guardian653dave · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 0, Redundant

please make it stop....

--
God's in his heaven-All's right with the world. Karma=Bad ? F*ck that
iPod image by calibanDNS · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 1

When will the iPod image used for Media (Apple) stories be updated from the 1st Gen to a 4th gen iPod?
1. Re:iPod image by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:41 · Score: 0
  
  when will that start using Final Fantasy X characters instead of the old SNES FF characters?
Let me guess... by DesertBlade · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 0

ANother April Fools prank.

--
Half of writing history is hiding the truth.
Yawn. April. Fools. by Ulrich+Hobelmann · 2005-04-01 10:36 · Score: 1

My now worm is dominating the world already, and you all just don't know it.

Ok, I shut up.
NOT by yttrium · 2005-04-01 10:37 · Score: 1

Apple couldn't afford him. No one on the planet could!
Actual news?? by cplusplus · 2005-04-01 10:37 · Score: 3, Insightful

The second bit of actual news (okay, maybe) is also about Apple.
Slashdot has made me hate April Fools. What a day to get mod points.

--
"False hope is why we'll never run out of natural resources!" - Lewis Black
1. Re:Actual news?? by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:39 · Score: 0
  
  "What a day to get mod points."
  
  Wow, you were double joked :)
2. Re:Actual news?? by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 11:01 · Score: 0
  
  To express what everybody is thinking at this point: Huuuzaaaah!
And the worst part is... by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:37 · Score: 3, Funny

" Brilliant. Apple has found another way to keep Linux users from using their products. Hire away the coders that try to make their stuff work with Linux. Strategy wise, Jobs is really beginning to match Gates! "
-from the link

You God damned Linux geeks can't even take a joke... :)
April Fool? by rpozz · 2005-04-01 10:39 · Score: 1

Almost certainly. Believable though, and would raise some interesting points if it was true.
NEWS FLASH by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:39 · Score: 0

SlAsHdOt AND THE ONION TO MERGE

aprol foolz lol
Jon is to replace.. by Anonymouse+Cownerd · 2005-04-01 10:39 · Score: 1

Steve Jobs, who wont have any free time now ...

--
http://www.rayn.net . Funny. Stuff.
Have to say it. by krgallagher · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 1

From the article:
He has reportedly paid DVD Jon an undisclosed yet bizarrely huge amount of money to join Apple. DVD Jon has accepted the offer adding to the ever-growing list of hackers who bag security jobs (pun unintended) in big companies.
1. Hack iTunes
2. ?????
3. Profit

--
Insert Generic Sig Here:
slashdot reports, you decide by swschrad · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 1

in other news, Italy's Grokster network goes silent as clinicians attending to Pope John Paul II step on the power cord for the papal server, and the major Grok server for southern Europe is interrupted.

--
if this is supposed to be a new economy, how come they still want my old fashioned money?
Ok... Enough already by rminsk · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 0, Redundant

We all know it is April Fools day. Every other forum I visit has one or maybe two April fools jokes. Slashdot has managed to run the joke into the ground.
1. Re:Ok... Enough already by Dimpled+Chad · 2005-04-01 10:48 · Score: 1
  
  It's after five here, there's a party going on next door ... and I'm still reading ./
Wtf.. by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 0

Wtf.. I hate this day.
DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die DIE die !!!!!!!!!!!
Reason: Don't use so many caps. It's like YELLING.
DIE!
Good idea... by Aslan72 · 2005-04-01 10:40 · Score: 1

For me this ranks in the 'Why the heck not?' catagory. That and releasing an I386 version of OSX...
--pete "Who enjoys the April fools jokes"
now i remeber the hate by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 10:41 · Score: 0

Last year /. made me hate april 1. This year they reminded. Worthless.
Nice! by bryan8m · 2005-04-01 10:42 · Score: 1

If you can't beat 'em, hire 'em!
HEY! I could use a job at apple! by Quick+Sick+Nick · 2005-04-01 10:42 · Score: 1

/ starts hacking apple software
But... look! by The-Bus · 2005-04-01 10:43 · Score: 1

You know...

InnovativeAthletic.com* offers some really nice prices on custom wall padding. Their covered material meets California Fire Marshall's specifications for flammability. Your padding can be delivered easily in many attractive colors: Navy Blue, Yellow, Red, White, Beige, Green, Grey, Black, Orange, and Royal Blue. Prices start as low as $69.

I suggest we all order this immediately as it is becoming perilous to repetitively beat our heads against the fucking wall for all the stupid April Fool's jokes /. is doing. I feel really bad for MirrorDot and others who are archiving and mirroring all this idiocy. It's like the Internet, reduced to one site.

Please, at least put a throw pillow on your forehead and tie it with a headband. We're all going to hurt ourselves if we keep slamming our heads against the wall like this.

* I am in no way partnered with this site! Nor do I currently have padded walls.

--
Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.
Re:Despite this being a joke by Patrick+Mannion · 2005-04-01 10:44 · Score: 1

Same. They really need to hire him. They've got to learn that as long as they keep him out there, he'll keep plugging away at his keyboard. I mean I haven't that they released a new patch maybe out of fear he'll crack that one. They need to hire him. It's a given.

--
In America, you spam computers In Soviet Russia, computers spam you!
I crush your tiny head! by argent · 2005-04-01 10:46 · Score: 1

I already posted this.
1. Re:I crush your tiny head! by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 11:03 · Score: 0
  
  Well huzaaaaah to you Sir!
Geeks have no sense of humor by Threatis · 2005-04-01 11:02 · Score: 1

Christ people, it's a JOKE. as they ALL are today. if you cant deal with it, dont read /. today. It amazes me how bent out of shape oyu guys are getting over one day out of 365 that the guys from /. feel like having a wee bit of fun.

just because you cant laugh from your parents basement, doesn't mean that the rest of us cant have fun.

--
"The beast in me is caged by frail and fragile bars" - Johnny Cash
1. Re:Geeks have no sense of humor by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 11:19 · Score: 0
  
  Huzaaah from your mother's basement!
2. Re:Geeks have no sense of humor by argent · 2005-04-01 12:30 · Score: 1
  
  It amazes me how bent out of shape oyu guys are getting over one day out of 365 that the guys from /. feel like having a wee bit of fun.
  
  You mean... all the other stuff... the dups... the stuff that isn't news... the stuff that doesn't matter... they don't even have the excuse that they enjoy it?
  
  That's sad, my friend. Sad.
right. People who do whatever they feel like... by Anonymous Coward · 2005-04-01 11:05 · Score: 0

What's the point in hiring someone if he cannot be told what to do? Like throwing money away?

The word utilitize implies utility. Utility is measured by what someone/thing can do for you.

Slashdot amazes me sometimes.
It's now April 2 by Linuxathome · 2005-04-02 09:15 · Score: 1

Now, that it's April 2, I'm going to post a serious comment. Imagine if Apple was able to hire him, AND was able to make him sign a contract to 0wnz his code. Even if he had the time outside of Apple to tinker and hack, he would NEVER be able to release one iota of code during his tenure at Apple. Sure he may have the creative freedom he's always had, but would never be able to release them and discuss it others -- can anyone put a dollar amount to this? Sounds like for Jon, it's damned if you do damned if you don't, that is, he's got to make money somehow. Even if Apple doesn't make good use of Jon, it sounds like hiring him to shut him up may be worthwhile.

--
Linux at home