Alex, The Brainy Parrot Who Knows About Zero

Roland Piquepaille writes "Alex is a 28-year-old grey parrot who lives in a lab at Brandeis University in Waltham, Mass., and can count, identify objects, shapes, colors and materials. And now, Alex has grasped the concept of zero, according to World Science. In fact, Alex can describe the absence of a numerical quantity on a tray containing colored cubes. When a color is missing, Alex consistently identified this 'zero quantity' by saying the label 'none.' You might think that this is just a parrot trick, but this research about 'bird intelligence' might also help autistic and other learning-disabled children 'who have trouble learning language and counting skills.' This overview contains other details, references and a picture of Alex counting his colored cubes."

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Scientists got their hopes up

[koreaman]

These same scientists have retracted their earlier statements in record time. They are currently developing various theories to explain how they could have possibly thought Holand Piquepaille was becoming an altruist.

One scientist blames Bob Matthews, the lead scientist, and was recorded saying, "I have no idea what the fuck my colleage Bob was thinking. I mean, Holand Piquepaille, an altruist? There's no way." This seems to be a common sentiment. This school of thought points to massive quantites of acid, crack, pot, and plain ol' alcohol in Matthews' bloodstream.

A completely different faction thinks that, as speculated in my previous post, Holand simply grasped a similar post. "It could have been anything," the faction leader said, "But the highest likelihood is something along the lines of either 'The size of my penis' or 'number of people who don't hate me'."

Keep posted for breaking news as this story develops.