Slashdot Mirror
Server Based Slots of the Future
prostoalex writes "The slot machines of the future won't be dumb one-armed bandits anymore, CNet reports. New generation of slot machines, to be deployed in major Vegas casinos, will feature server-based gaming with games, new features and, most important, the odds being downloaded from a central server location, not determined by internal machine algorithm any more."
Some cynics here may doubt the security of the system, but I'm sure none of the gaming vendors will hide any Easter eggs in their proprietary code. After all, if one can make software work reliably for something as complicated as counting votes, surely a simple application like a few hundred different kinds of casino games should be child's play to secure.
"Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery?" - Patrick Henry
At 0730 today, myself and fellow soldier of fortune Luke Genitals infiltrated the Geek Compound. Our mission - the "Official Slashdot Guide to Moderation." We finally procured a copy of this document from a pile of S&M oriented pornography and left to meet up with our buyer. Things went bad at the drop, we got set up, and now I am being trailed by both the Yakuza and Cmdr. Taco. If I should not make it through the night, I want you to know the truth so my life was not lost in vain.
My friends, I have seen unspeakable things at the Geek Compound. I can never forget the horrors I witnessed...horrors that no amount of money can undo. If I live I might share some, but I must first escape my present situation. Here is an electronic copy of the stolen document. I have burned the original and ingested the ashes so please spread this around. I regret nothing and we cannot allow the truth to be censored.
Official Slashdot Guide to Moderation
rev. 3 5/29/00
by Cmdr. Taco
Introduction - Welcome sir to the fine world of being a Slashdot moderator! In this document we shall attempt to explain the ins-and-outs of moderation via the 4 key issues of what we taught you while at the Geek Compound.
1 - Physical Changes - When we took you under our wing, you were but a boy. Now you are a fine specimen of manly wonder! To mark this right of passage we have, as you already can tell, altered your physical body. Do not be alarmed at this, rather embrace these changed to allow you to serve Slashdot better.
The humor bypass is by far the most important part of moderation. Humor, sarcasm, and wit are not good things to possess and only hinder your job as a moderator. By use of our high radiation emitting CRTs we have atrophied the humor portion of your brain. This enables you to see through the juvenile behavior exhibited in many posts to the -1, Offtopic nature they actually are.
Remember - Humor is evil! We have freed you from the bondage of laughter forever.
Yes, you have been emasculated. While the mere thought of this would normally be disgusting, we here at Slashdot will supply you enough LSD and Xanex so you do not have to worry about this. Sex, like humor, is an evil unnatural thing. With your mind free to think not of sex, you now have more time to serve Slashdot.
And lets be honest here...you didn't really have a girlfriend regardless of what you told your friends. Embrace your asexual nature and let us frolic in the meadows as eunuchs, together!
Take a good look at your chest now. Does the "property of
By displaying this brand to a clerk, you are eligible for 10% discounts at the following stores: K-Mart, Phil's Discount Liquor and Methamphetamine, and Slutty Sally's Steakhouse. Clothes, entertainment, and food - all bases seem to be covered
2 - Crack - Smoking crack is an integral part of moderation. We will provide you with an unlimited supply of crack rocks, pipes, and lighters. We find that smoking crack enables you to mark posts in the more PC and friendlier image Slashdot needs to present. While you may be opposed to drug use, you must smoke crack to moderate.
As you might have seen on your visit to the Geek Compound, we have a large room devoted to crack manufacturing. Our well-trained Malaysian slaves convert raw cocaine into crack just for you! Do not worry about the addictive properties of cocaine as will provide you with more LSD and Xanex if crack addiction troubles you.
Please note - This is not freebase! Freebase is dangerous to produce if ethyl ether is used. This is rock cocaine, aka