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Microsoft Fights the Flab as it Turns 30

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the dang-we're-almost-the-same-age dept.

Alain Williams writes "This review of Microsoft, as it enters middle age, looks at it's problems in maintaining growth." Discusses the recent Kai-Fu Lee/Google debacle, as well as things like Apple's iPod.

6 of 214 comments (clear)

  1. Time for the... by chanda3199 · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...red midlife crisis sports car?

    1. Re:Time for the... by tomhudson · · Score: 5, Funny
      No, they're past the "mid-life crisis" stage.

      Mid-life crisis, you buy stuff to make you feel better (Microsofts' bought LOTS of stuff over the years).

      Cranky old spinster is more like it. Throwing chairs, continually trying to evoke the ghost of the good old days, complaining that nobody gives them the respect they think they still deserve, upset that everyone is going all googley-eyed for those who are younger, prettier, cooler, sexier.

      Now we see the aging dame getting some cosmetic surgery, trying to put a new face on the old battleaxe. Unfortunately, in both looks and code, beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes right to the bone.

      Sure, she can still get a date. She has money. There are those who are quite willing to play the part of Deuce Bigelow, male gigolo. But she knows that her bedmates are only in it for the bucks, they may be with her physically, but mentally they're miles away, wondering how they can "get lucky" with the new prom queen, and worried that they may never be able to because of the "Ewww - you slept with HER?" factor.

      Stay tuned for the next installment - "Microsoft Windows - Vampire Edition", where a deal with the devil is quickly done, and for some reason users are feeling drained (well, more than usual) ...

  2. Another year older... by burtdub · · Score: 5, Funny

    When Microsoft hits its midlife crisis, what's it going to do? Patent the Porsche?

  3. F**K OFF by gowen · · Score: 5, Funny

    Thirty is not middle aged.

    Love,
    Gaz (age 32)

    --
    Athletic Scholarships to universities make as much sense as academic scholarships to sports teams.
    1. Re:F**K OFF by fatman22 · · Score: 4, Funny

      You're not an Old Fart (note the caps) until your grandchildren start building computers out of the parts in your junk bin.

  4. Weight Watchers by deaddrunk · · Score: 4, Funny

    I lost 44 pounds, perhaps MS should sign up and lose several pounds of chair-throwing, monkey-dancing flab.

    --
    Does a Christian soccer team even need a goalkeeper?