Slashdot Mirror


Cow Tipping is a Myth

Faeton writes "It's the kind of story you hear from a friend of a friend -- how, after a long night in a rural hostelry and at a loss for entertainment in the countryside, they head out into a nearby field. There, according to the second-hand accounts, they sneak up on an unsuspecting cow and turn the poor animal hoof over udder. But now, much to the relief of dairy herds, the sport of cow-tipping has been debunked as an urban, or perhaps rural, myth by scientists at a Canadian university. "

39 of 153 comments (clear)

  1. Never underestimate the power of Nandrolone... by TripMaster+Monkey · · Score: 3, Interesting

    From TFA:
    Ms Boechler, now a trainee forensics analyst for the Royal Canadian Mounted Corps, concluded in her initial report that a cow standing with its legs straight would require five people to exert the required force to bowl it over.
    Five normal people, perhaps...or perhaps just one college football jock, hopped up on steriods and Jagermeister...

    (Before the naysayers start yammering about the misconceptions of steroid use, let me relate a personal experience of mine. Back in my college days, I watched my football jock roommate (an avowed Nandralone user) put his shoulder through the dorm room wall (concrete block), during a Jager bender. I doubt a mere cow would have had much of a chance against this guy.)
    --
    ____

    ~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey

    1. Re:Never underestimate the power of Nandrolone... by itwerx · · Score: 4, Informative

      ...put his shoulder through the dorm room wall (concrete block)...

      A concrete block wall, (especially if it's not a filled and rebar-reinforced load-bearing wall :), is actually surprisingly weak. Concrete can be incredibly strong when subjected solely to compression forces, but has minimal tensile strength. Consider also that not only does your college roommate have a fair amount of weight, but he is likely delivering it near the center (floor to ceiling) and so has maximum leverage to his advantage as well. I can't say I've ever attempted that particular feat myself but I've done enough other "interesting" things to concrete with my bare hands that I'm not too surprised to hear a drunk jock managed to break a wall...

    2. Re:Never underestimate the power of Nandrolone... by Axe · · Score: 3, Funny
      I wonder how many college nerds will provoke their roommates to actually try this after reading this article.

      And of course you can tip a cow. This article is garbage pseudo-science. Blatant and ignorant misuse of perfectly good physics. Damn canadians.

      --
      <^>_<(ô ô)>_<^>
    3. Re:Never underestimate the power of Nandrolone... by Tackhead · · Score: 2, Funny
      > And of course you can tip a cow. This article is garbage pseudo-science. Blatant and ignorant misuse of perfectly good physics. Damn canadians.

      I used to work at a restaurant. A cow orker of mine was little on the tubby side, but very cute, and she certainly never had any trouble getting tipped. *rimshot*

    4. Re:Never underestimate the power of Nandrolone... by iamlucky13 · · Score: 3, Insightful

      You city people are funny. Cows don't sleep on their feet. Heck, they hardly ever even sleep when laying down, just get dopey, and trust me, you are not going to move a cow that's laying down.

      As for your "mere cow" theory, if you ever tried to move one you would find that they're a lot tougher than you think. First of all, they weigh 1000 pounds or more. I've seen Holstein bulls as big as 4000 pounds. That weight includes a lot of muscle. They're not as tough per weight as pigs, the most difficult animal I've ever had to wrestle into a loading chute, but a cow does not go anywhere it doesn't feel at least a minor incentive to go (hence cattle prods...). Your beefy jock friend may have been 250 pounds or so, but he's facing an animal 4 times his size or more with a lower center of gravity. I admit if a couple of tough guys snuck up on a dumb cow chewing it's cud, they could probably knock it over, but most cows don't even let people touch them.

      Anybody who did ever tip a cow over is a jerk. If a cow ends up on the wrong side, it's stomach ends up on it's lungs and they suffocate. They often can't get their legs underneath themselves to get up.

  2. Center of mass? by The+Madd+Rapper · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Is the center of mass really at exactly half the cow's height? Looking at the image in the article, most of the mass is distributed above the COM. The assumption of people only being able to push their own bodyweight is unexplained as well.

    --
    That's the shit that feds me up
    1. Re:Center of mass? by cgenman · · Score: 4, Interesting

      It gets worse. Notice how the diagram assumes that the fulcrum of the cow is the opposite leg? This assumes a 100% rigid body cow. How rigid is a cow if it isn't expecting to be knocked over? If the cow's legs provided full vertical support but no angular rigity, a slight breeze would blow that parallelogram over.

      In essence, they've shown the theoretical maximum force required to tip a cow.

      And, of course, she doesn't try to tip any cows herself. It seems a bit irresponsible to prove that it can't be done mathematically, without checking your work yourself.

      Not necessarily relevant to the findings of the article, but notice in the diagram where the center of mass is located?

    2. Re:Center of mass? by Scarblac · · Score: 5, Funny

      Is the center of mass really at exactly half the cow's height?

      Of course! First, we assume a spherical cow...

      --
      I believe posters are recognized by their sig. So I made one.
  3. The real truth. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Interesting

    As someone from bible belt heartland america, we have a few dairy cows. And I personally have been a party to cow tipping, and it is completely possible, and 4 of us did it.

    So tell me how that's impossible again?

    1. Re:The real truth. by nes11 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Same here. I grew up in just about the smallest town you can imagine & have personally seen it happen.

      Mine's actually quite a funny story. It was county fair time & some of the guys thought they'd be funny & tip the cows in the pen at the rodeo arena. 15-20 cows, one small pen, 2 drunk high school guys, and a crowd full of peer pressure. They did get a cow knocked over, but one guy barely made it out & the other came out with a broken foot & cracked rib. For some reason a little alcohol prevents one from realizing that cows may try to stampede when one of their brethern is attacked.

    2. Re:The real truth. by Chuckstar · · Score: 2, Informative

      The link you gave specifically says that Brethren is the plural of Brother

  4. uhm...duh!!! by omibus · · Score: 4, Informative

    First off, cows sleep laying down. I lived on a dairy for 15 years and had to wake them up.

    So, if the cow is standing, it is awake.

    Next, a good sized dairy cow weighs in at over 1000 lbs.
    Standing, feet average width apart -- you, scrawny programmer boy (or me, an almost athetic 200 lbs) aint just gonna nock the thing over. Head start or no.

    But, it was a fun joke to pull on the city kids.

    --
    Bad User. No biscuit!
    1. Re:uhm...duh!!! by DaoudaW · · Score: 3, Interesting

      First off, cows sleep laying down. I lived on a dairy for 15 years and had to wake them up.
      I was born and raised on a dairy farm and had my own small herd by the time I was in high school. Of course cows sleep laying down, but if you had to wake them up you were getting up too early! ;-)

      So, if the cow is standing, it is awake.
      Good call.

      Next, a good sized dairy cow weighs in at over 1000 lbs.
      Actually that would be quite a small cow like a Jersey or a Guernsey. A typical Holstein would be more in the 1500 pound range.

      Standing, feet average width apart -- you, scrawny programmer boy (or me, an almost athetic 200 lbs) aint just gonna nock the thing over. Head start or no.
      Of course not. The whole idea of dispelling the myth scientifically is one of the more ridiculous things I've ever heard of. It's a total joke and always has been.

      Now just to confuse all you city slickers, there is a technique called "throwing" which is commonly used on farms and which is used in the rodeo event of bulldogging. Essentially the idea is to twist the head at the same time as you throw the animal off balance with your hip. I've personally thrown calves up to about 900 pounds, but in my experience it takes two men with a rope to throw a full-sized cow.

  5. NOOO000ooooooo! by Trikenstein · · Score: 3, Funny

    My whole belief system is undone.

    1. Re:NOOO000ooooooo! by thenetbox · · Score: 4, Funny

      No! Worry not, brother. It is clearly only a theory. Someone put a warning sticker on this article.

  6. Geography is also a factor by shockbeton · · Score: 4, Funny

    Geography is also an important factor to consider. For example: If the animal in question to be tipped is located in Kansas, the calculation must also include the force exerted by an Intelligent Tipper.

  7. Hey! by dacarr · · Score: 5, Funny

    I always tip my cows 15%, you insensitive clods!

    --
    This sig no verb.
    1. Re:Hey! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      The sex was that good, huh?

  8. BS by meta-monkey · · Score: 3, Funny

    This story is total BS! A friend of my cousin's friends sister TOTALLY did this last summer after they got hammered at this party and it was AWESOME the cow was like "WTF?!" and they were all like "HAHA!" and then they ran off 'cause the farmer was coming! Seriously you can ask anybody!

    --
    We don't have a state-run media we have a media-run state.
  9. science...? by Mahou · · Score: 3, Insightful

    so we're supposed to just accept this as conclusive even though they didn't test their "findings", aren't physicists or mathematicians, make all kinds of assumptions, and no one else has reproduced their experiment (even thoough you can't since they didn't actually do an experiment which means they don't have real findings)? I'll believe it when the mythbusters come out with an episode about it.

    --
    if i'm not immortal, what's the point of living?
    ...te?
  10. not a myth by PC9001 · · Score: 3, Informative

    Obviously these scientists haven't done very thorough field research. I'm from a small rural town of 1600 people, and I've witnessed cow tippings.

  11. damn by Pierre · · Score: 4, Funny

    Growing up in the rural midwest....

    Cow tipping, as we implimented it, was not myth - it was a prank.

    We would convince a unsuspecting victim that we were going cow tipping - drive to a field far from town and send in unsuspecting victim to dodge the land mines that cows leave to protect themselves and then drive away leaving the victim walk miles back to town in the dark with their cow dung covered shoes.

    I wonder if we could get Jack Malvern to go for a ride so that we could 'disprove' is article? buhuhhahahahahaa

  12. Just goes to show that even smart people can be... by Darius+Jedburgh · · Score: 4, Insightful

    ...idiots. People who think that armed with some basic knowledge of statics think they can actually figure out what happens when you do complex things to complex objects. Cows can stand in a variety of poses allowing their center of mass to be in a variety of position with respect to their hooves and their legs will tend to buckle if pressure is applied suddenly from one side. I can see an armchair physicist maybe getting an estimate to within a factor of 2 or 3 of what force is required to tip a cow using the naive methods described, but not much better. I wonder if these are the same people who told us bees can't fly.

  13. Why machines... by Ummu · · Score: 2, Funny

    were invented. Who does crap manually?

  14. Umm, bullshit by BrookHarty · · Score: 4, Funny

    Cows standing asleep (they sleep both standing and on the ground.) can be tipped, I've seen it done on my grandmothers farm, but the cow was on a mound.

    Its tipping, not pushing. They article shows what it would take to *push* a cow over..

    But whats really funny is when dogs bite the tail of a cow and the cow spins lifting the dog up in the air, thats funny.

    Its only funny because its true.

  15. While the math may be right, it's wrong... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Cow tipping is possible. How do I know? Do I know some guy that saw some guy do it? Nope. I've done it. The article focuses on simply applying the force to the top of the cow. That doesn't work. Everybody in my county knows that. For those interested (I'm not really sure why you would be, but then again I probably don't want to know...), you have to push/pull the cow's legs while pushing on the top. A popular "trick" around here is to tie the cow's hooves together (a sort of looseish hog-tie) before tipping, pull on the rope... the cow is down and it cant kick properly, so it wont get back up without a whole lot of help, and because it's kicking, you can't get close enough to cut the rope for a while... Yes, I'll admit it (just this once); I'm from the one of the hickest towns in the country...

  16. Cow Tippers Anonymous by Geek_Cop · · Score: 4, Funny

    Um, I have cow tipped, with my friends on my high school football team. I do not recall ever tipping over a cow, because we were too busy getting chased and pinned against the fences. Perhaps watching a 5'7 250 pound lineman get lifted by the crotch by a pissed heifer can be considered Cow Tipping? It was all fun and games until the skinny guy pissed on the electric fence. It isn't about tipping the cows over, it is about the comraderie and the lifelong experiences..and the risk of possible incapacitating lifelong spinal injuries...those are the things that make cow tipping an experience that no bible thumper should be without.

  17. Biology and Aikido by hummassa · · Score: 2, Interesting

    To tip a living being is EASIER than tipping a statue. Living things are easily surprised and taken off-balance.
    My personal experience with ruminants is: I ran over a horse once and I ran over a cow, too.
    The horse: I was at 110km/h (70mph) in a 1979 GM Chevette whose brake system, unknowingly to me up till that time, was defective. I saw the horse going to the middle of the road at 150m distance, hit the brakes, and nothing! I swung the car to the left (so I could avoid hitting the horse on me), and the horse rolled (ONCE) over the right side of my car (broke the windshield and I had to repair the right A-column) and fell on his feet. Speed on impact: at least 80km/h (50mph). Horse weight: 600kg. The horse survived, with a broken rib.
    The cow: I was at 110km/h (70mph) in a 1995 Fiat Tempra. It was 11pm and I was coming back from a 600km (370mi) away one-day trip. I saw the cow at less than 100m (110yd) distance, and hit the brakes, slowing down to something in the range of 50-60 km/h (30-37 mph) in the point of impact. The cow rolled TWICE over the front of the car and THRICE again in the floor behind the car (there was no escape to me because a truck was coming in the other lane). It was a big preggie cow, weighting at least 1000kg (2200lb). The cow and its offspring were dead on site. The dynamics of the cow rolling over and over suggests to me that tipping a cow is easier than it looks.
    Besides, I weight 100kg and I can push a 200kg weight around. This myth is not busted, guys. :-) Hope Adam or Jamie or someone else MythBuster reads /. ...

    --
    It's better to be the foot on the boot than the face on the pavement. ~~ tkx Kadin2048
    1. Re:Biology and Aikido by Kiaser+Zohsay · · Score: 2, Funny

      in a 1979 GM Chevette whose brake system, unknowingly to me up till that time, was defective.

      All Chevettes had Fred Flintsone brakes. You had to push the brake pedal so hard, you might as well drag your foot on the ground to stop. Also, a roommate of mine found out the hard way that a pony keg will not fit in the hatchback without reclining the back seat. It looks like the hatch will close, until the lock latches and the window cracks.

      --
      I am not your blowing wind, I am the lightning.
    2. Re:Biology and Aikido by AndersOSU · · Score: 4, Funny

      Stop buying crappy cars!
      Currently taking bets 3:1 that parent dies by hitting moose in kia spectra.

  18. Typical innumeracy you'd expect from a zoologist. by gedhrel · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Rather overaccurate numbers for the number of people you'd need (4.43), the calculations state things with a level of accuracy that indicates the calculator is the usual seminumerate soft scientist. I bet they quote the level of sodium they get in "half an average grapefruit" to three significant figures too.

    However, the model assumes the cow is static, whilst later giving the lie to this. A single person can tip a cow (I've done it, I'm 5'7" and weigh little and had about a 50% hit rate - hey, there was little to do where I grew up). The cow _does_ react to a shove - the process is more like cow tripping than cow tipping, but they most certainly do go over.

  19. Kneel behind it! by elliotj · · Score: 4, Funny

    The guys who researched this article are idiots. Anybody can tell you that it only takes two people to tip a cow: one guys sneaks up and kneels behind it before the other guy runs up and pushes it over.

  20. Re:call the discovery channel by Kiaser+Zohsay · · Score: 2, Funny

    Or just use a fake cow...

    ... but it would be the coolest, most hi-tech fake cow ever, with a steel skeleton and a polyurathane body filled with half a ton of ballistics gell.

    --
    I am not your blowing wind, I am the lightning.
  21. Conclusions from the comments. by Vo0k · · Score: 3, Funny

    1) Cows are tippable
    2) The model is inadequate
    3) Weak oversight of the model and lack of experimental data made for wrong publication
    4) There's a lot of seasoned rednecks on Slashdot
    5) Nobody cares about the cows, you insensitive clods!

    --
    Anagram("United States of America") == "Dine out, taste a Mac, fries"
  22. Beware of any scientist ... by Zero__Kelvin · · Score: 2, Interesting



    Beware of any scientist who determines if a cow can be tipped by developing complex models, rather than going out and trying to tip a cow.

    That being said, this article is par for the course in contemporary "journalism." Very poorly written. There is no telling where the inaccuracy of the "journalist" stops and the absurdity of the claims made by the "scientist" begin. At the very least, the article itself concedes that two people may be able to tip a cow, but says the whole thing is a myth in the title. Which brings me to my second fair warning ... beware of journalists who contradict themselves several times in the same article (or these days, just beware of journalists, I suppose.) Another way to say it is this: believe none of what you hear, half of what you read, and only about 90% of what you see.

    --
    Guns don't kill people; Physics kills people! - John Lithgow as Dick Solomon on Third Rock From The Sun
  23. Think about what happens when they take a step... by MarkusQ · · Score: 2, Informative

    If they start to step by raising a leg on the far side, it will make them easier to tip.

    If they raise a leg on the near side and try to step away, it will make them easier to tip.

    Their best (and typical) response is to raise a near leg and move it towards the tipper, broadening their base and lowering their center of gravity. That, and only that, would makle them harder to tip. But that does not mean I agree with the articles conclusions.

    --MarkusQ

  24. Nonsense by hairykrishna · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Theory should always, where possible, be tested by experiment. Judging by my personal observations (I grew up in the country) there's a flaw in her calculations somehwere. My guess is that she has the centre of mass way too low.

    --
    "Physics is to math as sex is to masturbation." -R. Feynman
  25. Re:In soviet russia... by Oxygen99 · · Score: 2, Funny

    In Soviet Russia Cows tip you? Yeah. Sure. Pull the udder one...

    --
    I had a dream, bright and carefree, but now there's doubt and gravity