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Artificial Tornadoes
An anonymous reader writes "This inventor is working on a method of creating artificial tornadoes to generate electricity which he calls the "Atmospheric Vortex Engine". He is claiming that it is possible to create a man-made tornado and use wind turbines to capture the energy from the tornado. On the website there is some video footage of some experimental tornadoes that were generated in a prototype vortex tower in Utah. There seem to be several recent media references to his work including The
Economist and The Guardian.
Sounds like an interesting idea for a renewable energy source, but what happens if one of these tornadoes gets away?"
Maybe we should sell this to FEMA and put them in charge of creating all natural disasters in the United States. (You know, they could change their name to the Federal Emergency Making Agency...) That way we'd have hurricanes that could destroy the world, but it would take six to eight weeks before anything actually happened, giving us plenty of time to actually prepare for the disaster when it finally did arrive.
Creative misinterpretation is your friend.
I hope it's a roaring success.
Oh no... it's the future.
Yeah, I got one of these out of a Frosted Flakes box when I was a kid. It's a little plastic widget and you screw it in-between two 2-liter soda bottles, and when you flip them over, instant tornado! I don't know how you get power from it...
Comment of the year
I dunno; stick one of these turbines on top of a car and not only would you have a tornado-powered car, you could use it to suck up the traffic in front of you!
Real_men_don't_need_spacebars.
... obligatory demanding of ONE MILLION DOLLARS.
Seriously, what evil overlord would miss such an opportunity?
Justice is the sheep getting arrested while an impartial judge declares the vote void.
Simple, you film a new reality show about the runaways, the sequels write themselves...
I am very sucseptible to "let's have another drink"
I don't know, but I'm sure Jerry Bruckheimer will tell us, one of these years.
Blizzard Entertainment has launched their torpedo and commenced a submarine patent attack on the man trying to create artificial tornadoes. Blizzard claims prior art on the idea of man-made weather phenomenons, citing the "Blizzard" spell found in hit titles such as "WarCraft", "WarCraft II", and "WarCraft III". From the depth of their lair, they pulled out a letter from the US patent office granting them rights to all ideas concerning the control of weather by man. In a Double Whammy ruling, Blizzard was also granted rights over all forms of "death and decay" techniques by an evil entity. Talks between Blizzard and Microsoft is currently underway on how Microsoft can license such technology.
EvilCON - Made Famous by
Oh sure, you can say that all naively--until the tornados from various towers, fed up with their oppression, form a union and combine into one giant-ass tornado that's hell-bent on giving you the Judy Garland treatment!
Fear the artificial vortices!
Constitutional rights may be respected, repealed, or modified; but they must never be ignored.
I mean really people. The proof is right here!!!
If a weatherman from Pocatello, ID can figure it out surely you can too! Now we know the technology exists to have a tornado take out anyone, anywhere at anytime.
"Giving money and power to governments is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys." - P.J. O'Rourke
Move to a trailer park. One will be along shortly.
Just create a mobile home park within about a mile and you'll know exactly where a runaway tornado will go. Set up a net there, catch it and return it to its turbine cage. Maybe give the tornade a three strikes rule and after its third runaway, just turn it back to slow moving air, or threaten to send it to the jet stream in Canada because we know how much tornados hate the cold.
"Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change."
You've had too much to drink, Master Bruce. And Master Grayson is still waiting for you in your bedroom.
Michael Crichton is hard at work on his next book..... a Tornadoe gets out of a ultra-secret lab and a scientist, a child, and a surprisingly militarily trained caretaker have to track it down and stop it.
The way the title kerned-out on this horrible school LCD, I thought it read "Tomadoes". I was like, WTF are tomadoes?
The proper placement of tin can single and double wides should act as a catalyst for the formation of tornandos.
One of these should be installed in every place where politicians meet.
Reminds me of an old physics joke.
One pro-nuke physicist and one anti-nuke physicist are arguing.
So the pro-nuke physicist says "Go calculate the radiation exposure and tell if you'd rather sleep with a woman or a nuclear reactor."
The anti-nuke physicist does it and comes back.
He says "Well, I'd still rather sleep next to a woman, but I wouldn't want to sleep with two."
...to just install wind turbines in trailer parks?