Technology Predictions for 2006?
OffTheLip writes "As 2006 fast approaches it's time for some to gaze into the crystal ball of technology and predict what will be hot, what will make a difference in our lives or make someone rich and famous. The Mercury News takes a shot at predicting the coming year of technology. No great revelations but it nice to see clean technologies make the list. The list is light on pure technology and big on trends. Perhaps killer apps are not as important as they once were thought to be." What would Slashdot users put in their top 10?
this is the year we all get flying cars!
The domestication of the dog continues unabated.
microsoft makes a boatload of cash while their demise is predicted on slashdot,
linux is _almost_ ready for the desktop,
and duke nukem forever will briefly reach beta, only to be pulled
That we will have _____ wonderful technology in 20 years.
Because for some reason, everything wonderful always seems to be 20 years away.
[Fuck Beta]
o0t!
2006 will be the year Duke Nukem Forever comes out!
Although Microsoft didn't do so hot with their "trusted computing" initiative, they'll do much better with "trusted people". Check out a future issue of Playboy: "Hottest Places to Have Your RFID Chip Inserted! Please Your Woman and Keep Your Nation Safe at the Same Time!"
Ex nihilo nihil fit.
Google will come up with GoogleRate, a neat application that will automatically search for, record, archive, and then verify all these claims and predictions that everyone makes.
People will then be able to quickly find out how accurate companies, newspapers, etc. have been in the past when they now say that X will be popular this year or that the nano-wireless-widget market will grow from $2M to $100 billion over the next 5 years.
-- Fugacity: Confusing chemists since 1908
No, fuel cells! This is the year that they are only a year away! But maybe given all the stem cell research we could get monkeys flying from my butt. I predict digital ink will be big with lots of press releases and upcoming projects in future years. And this will be the year that a slashdot editor goes power crazy and tries to ransom sites with the threat of a slashdotting, and that he will fail miserably due to two other editors posting dupes of the story that editor #1 is threatening to post. The lack of faith in the negotiation will lead to long term hostility against the slashdot editors for posting duplicate stories on the same page causing multiple slashdotting. The end story will be that the submissions come from host servers with high per GB fees that had their customers intentionally slashdotted. This will cause mass user support for **Beatles. And in the Soviet New Year, technology puts out a list on you!
Why are women so complicated? Find out how little I know here.
1. The DMCA is overturned entirely when all the chief justices get threatening letters from RIAA for watching jib/jab videos. 2. The Patriot Act is declared dead in the water when it is found that undeclared wiretaps were actually against the FISA judges. 3. Video on demand systems requiring no physical media and available on multiple formats cause independent media moguls to become instant zillion-aires and they buy up studios by the dozens converting them to creative commons. 4. The really cool ultra slim portable gadgets found in Japan and Europe are actually released to North America versus gray market. 5. The hottest TV show involves high geek factor when a three guys, and a kid are marooned on a haunted island being bombed by the Pentagon, while a forgotten civilization forges forward trying to find a lost city in another galaxy with wierd looking zombie dudes who eat flesh play pool on the island with the guys and kid. 6. Video game ESPN sports takes on a new twist when they electrify the chairs with 100,000 volts. 7. Windows XP SP4 is released when nobody upgrades to the "late" Vista when no OEM produces a machine with a terabyte of disk space, and a 20Ghz processor required to do anything but load the OS. Bill Gates bursts into flames when demo-ing Vista from a microwave leaking processor. 8. Open Source Advocates actuall publish an agreed upon coding standard for all languages and it is ignored by all. 9. NASA launches a man to the moon sans rocket as it is determined that no rocket is safe therefore they get rid of the rocket and use a giant sling shot. 10. The Cubs win the world series.
--- Location Unknown
Apple will encase a piece of rock in white, translucent plastic, name it iCon and immediately sell five million of them for $249 each to fans solemnly declaring that Apple has redefined the meaning of amorhpous silicates.
Trust the Computer. The Computer is your friend.
Wimax becomes huge.
OpenOffice.org media campaign speeds adoption, achives 30% penetration.
Britney Spears remarries.
AJAX becomes even more popular making the internet kinda suck.
UPnP applications become almost universal.
Firefox penetration hits 25% before IE7 comes out and knocks it down to 15%, even though IE7 sucks.
Pope Benedict XVI dies.
Democrats take the house, gain in Senate.
US troops remain in Iraq throughout the year.
Bush's approval rating reaches 30%.
2006 Hurricane Season exausts name list again.
Somebody creates an effective non-website based bittorrent network.
Pi proven to be normal.
3 new higher prime numbers found.
Bird Flu kills about a dozen people and is stopped completely.
"The third man of the fire will empower the forces of the blue prince." - Deemed to be quite vague but fits several situations that occur.
South fails to rise again.
Majority of scientists backslide on existence of dark matter halos.
RIAA/MPAA go even more apesh!t.
It is no longer uncommon to be uncommon.
Voterless voting machines. No longer will the average american be burdened with the inconvience or respnosibility of voting. Simply register and you're done. Diebold will even see that you get to have a say in elections after you're dead. Field tested last year in Ohio the system is now ready for widespread use just in time for congrssional elections next year. Sit at home in comfort and watch the results to see who you voted for election night.
OK, maybe two things. Thrones will also be chairs.
... and then they built the supercollider.
Actually, I believe that we already have "sustained controlled fusion" reactions. What we'd like are sustained controlled fusion reactions which produce more energy than they consume.
The World Wide Web is dying. Soon, we shall have only the Internet.
It's a small world and it smells funny; I'd buy another if it wasn't for the money; Take back what I paid (SoM)
well duh revolution comes out in 2006
Snowden and Manning are heroes.
Satellite raadio service will be all the rage... until people stop and figure out that they are paying monthly to *listen to the radio*.
Meh.
How about a Quad core CPU. Two cores of Intel, and two cores of AMD technology all packaged togeather. No matter how your program is written, it will take advantage of the best set of cores for its function.
Ya... I can dream can't I?
Life is not for the lazy.
An end to Slashdot's April Fools tech coverage.
1. A dozen of new web-based RSS feed readers will be announced, all featuring tags and various intricate social features. Eventually one or two will be considered the "norm" (as Blogger, Livejournal, etc are considered the norm for blogging, despite all the imitators). My bookmarks folder rejoices.
2. AMD motherboards with DDR2 will finally show up. I finally upgrade from an obsolete 32-bit system. My applications rejoice.
3. Sony PlayStation 3 will be released. It will be sold out. Then more will be released. Then more will be sold out. Then more will be released. Then the price will drop a little. Then I'll buy one. Then it will be hacked by various groups for various purposes. Sony pouts. I rejoice.
4. A new flavour of Cola: Chocolate! (Eww) Oops, not technological, sorry.
5. Opera finally releases a stable, good, browser for PocketPCs. I rejoice.
6. Enlightenment 17 is finally released. I try it, don't like it, go back to XFCE.
7. XFCE 4.4 is finally released. I upgrade. I rejoice.
8. Microsoft releases Vista. Only thing new from XP: Aero and 9 versions of the same thing with 9 different price tags. (The cheaper version users are stuck with an inferior plastic paperclip.)
9. Apple releases their new line of Intel PowerBook laptops. No one notices -- attention diverted by the release of 4 and 8 gig iPod Nanos with FM radio. I consider buying one until I realize, again, that it's a waste of money. iPod lovers' collection of iPods grows to 9 units per person. Apple rejoices.
10. I go to sleep. You rejoice.
- shazow
Apple will launch iEarpod which fits in your ears. /. will continue to get trolled and post dubs. And possibly see member number 1.000.000. /. will finally understand the difference between Bill Gates as a private person, and Microsoft the company.
/. >_<
Spam text obfuscation will evole into a new language.
Steve Balmer will start a company to manufacture more durable chairs.
Linux/BSD will finally become available on toast (but remain uneatable until 2010).
Mary Poppins will make a surprise return as an online VR guide on Google.
India will outsource IT to Mars, after the martians makes official first contact on the first day of the 4th month of the year.
People will flock en masse to the stores to exchange/replace crap gifts recieved during Kwanzaa/Yule/Xmas/...
SCO will hire Uri Geller to represent SCO in the courts. Uri Geller will promptly get sued by the creators of the Chewbacca defense.
And finally...
I will probably continue to post serious and/or (un)funny posts on
Carbon based humanoid in training.
I think traditional breeding techniques have been woefully underused. Recent breeding experiments with foxes in Russia have shown that a noticeable difference can be produced in a much shorter time than expected. So my suggestions for controlled breeding are as follows:
And that's just off the top of my head right now. I'm sure I could think of much more when I'm sober.
Aide-toi, le Ciel t'aidera - Jeanne D'Arc.
How about a dupe-free /.?
Nevermind, I predict flying cars will come first.
And they said zombies weren't real!
George Lucas will finally succumb to his past and re-release a digitally enhanced re-mastered version of "The Star Wars Holiday Special". Thus, truly completing his Star Wars odyssey. Again, Burger King produces accompanying merchandise...fans rejoice.
1. Steve Ballmer will have his own TV show.
2. Google will contract Dalai Lama.
3. Many people will see Argentina winning FIFA World Cup 2006 on Internet.
4. Nicholas Negroponte will design an iPod clone for 20 dollars.
5. GNU Hurd will run on more machines.
6. Blogs will have recursive references.
7. New AJAX interfaces on your watch.
8. Linux penguin will be married.
9. XBOX Patched.
10. Amazon will read books to childrens while parents watch TV.