Why Does Uwe Boll Keep Making Films?

Kotaku Editor Brian Crecente has an article in the Rocky Mountain news discussing the seemingly unending wave of bad movies based on videogames being created by director Uwe Boll. From the article: "Gas Powered isn't concerned about his previous failures because his other movies were 'so low-budget,' he added. 'I think BloodRayne was his first budget over $10 million. The Dungeon Siege budget is over $60 million, so we have high hopes for the film.' Vince Desi has equally high hopes for Boll's upcoming film based on his game, Postal. Desi - outspoken founder of Running with Scissors, creator of what is considered the most violent mainstream game in history - contends things will be different when Boll creates a movie based on his game."

Comments

He's having fun?

[Quiet_Desperation]

And probably boning women on the level people here can't even imagine because he's a MOVIE DIRECTOR.

Seriously... someone needs to ask why?

If I could get investors to pay me million to make silly films, I'd do it. I'd even try to make the scripts decent.

Hmmm...

[Otter]

So far, only Gary Coleman has been cast for the movie, to play himself.

I don't see Boll's streak turning around on this one, either. Surely Todd Bridges would have been a better fit for Postal: The Movie, no? Maybe Coleman will be playing a gay cowboy or suicide bomber, and Boll is angling for a Golden Globe.

Because he's getting financing.

[IAAP]

He goes to the finance guys and says, "Hey, this game sold x million copies! Just think how many tickets it'll sell! Luv ya babe!"

The money guy's thinking, "Fuck, this guy's right! My kid is always in front of those things! We gotta put some $$$ in and the budget's below $100 million - WE CAN'T LOSE!"

Mix in some Hollywood coke and Voila! - A film is being made!

What's the mystery?

Duh!

[Ekarderif]

Uwe Boll is making the current video game movie market better. I mean look at the pre-Boll movies (no specific order):

• Mortal Kombat
• Street Fighter
• Super Mario Bros.
• Resident Evil
• Tomb Raider
• Final Fantasy

A very mediocre to bad offering right? Now have at the Boll movies:

• House of the Dead
• Alone in the Dark
• Bloodrayne

What differences are between these and the previous ones? That's right, they're far worse! See, Boll just made the prior video game movies look like classics! What a guy!

GLEN OR GLENDA

[Rowan_u]

Ed Wood, Ewe Bolle . . . quincidence? Come on now, films this bad are actually quite entertaining to watch. Anybody who doesn't believe me really needs to see GLEN OR GLENDA. Its an absolute riot. I for one plan to bring a troupe of gaming buddies to see BloodRayne and laugh it up. Mystery science theatre didn't make it through ten seasons for nothing.

Hidden agenda

[El_Muerte_TDS]

He has a hidden agenda with a certain US lawyer. Their goal is to ruin games by the means of making terrible movies based on them.

Re:German Tax Loophole

[the chao goes mu]

Then he has no need to worry

It's a truly original story, though!

[Tipa]

A farmer takes up the sword and shield, gathers companions and heads off to defeat ultimate evil? What's NOT to like!?

This movie has SO MUCH POTENTIAL!

WATCH as our hero gets STUCK BEHIND A ROCK!

THRILL as the adventurers are forced to walk an extra mile BECAUSE THEY CAN'T CLIMB A ONE FOOT RISE!

SCHEME with our hero after he dismisses a much-loved friend because he just met someone with BETTER STATS!

GASP as the group spends tense hours REARRANGING THE MULE'S PACKS!

And as a special bonuses, preview audiences will get a mannequin that watches the movie for you while you GO DO SOMETHING ELSE! (DS1 pretty much played itself...)

Imagine the great dialogue!

[kevin.fowler]

Sorry Kroduk, I need a healer. I'm going to have to let you go.

KRODUK SMASH. Kroduk wish you leave crappy ranger Ulora in crypt.