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Team Confirms UCLA Tabletop Fusion
An anonymous reader writes "A team of New York physicists has confirmed that a tabletop contraption made at UCLA does in fact generate nuclear fusion at room temperatures, using pairs of crystals and a small tank of deuterium. But unlike less reliable reports back in the 1980s, there's no talk this time of producing endless supplies of power. Rather, the technology could lead to ultra-portable x-ray machines and even a wearable device that could provide safe, continuous cancer treatment."
Crystals and holy water?
...will be for mood rings that give you finger cancer.
"Our device uses two crystals instead of one, which doubles the acceleration potential," says Jeffrey Geuther
Yeah well, now I'm going to use three!
"application may come in the form of a battery-operated, portable neutron generator"
Wait, what? We finally got cold fusion, but 'batteries not included'?
Unpleasantries.
Also overlooked is the forthcoming businesses selling crystal pendants and key chains which "fight" cancer and provide other beneficial effects.
I will now take bids on licensing my screenname.
Darn, now I have to go sell my palladium stash that I have put away just in case someone actually made it work the old fashioned way.
"It's the height of ridiculousness to say for those 9 lines you get hundreds of millions."
But can it crank out 1.21 gigawatts?
Government's view of the economy: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving,regulate it. If it stops moving, subsidize it.
Now THAT would be a keychain toy worth buying.
I only believe it when Netcraft confirms it. :-)
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
mod parent down, the movie sucked
To Hell with the Queen of England!
What if the crystal cracked?
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083791/
Bury me in mashed potatoes.
I never let science get in the way of a snarky comment.
Proud member of the American Non Sequitur Society. We might not make much sense, but boy do we love pizza!
Tabletop fusion is hard. You have to be rolling 20's to get it started.
I always thought the easiest way to smuggle in a nuke would be to bring it in through Miami hidden in a bale of cocaine.
None of them can see the clouds; The polished wings don't care.
I think the best method is in a warhead attached to an ICBM
You forgot 5 -- move really far away immediately after selling the gold, so that when your customers realize their gold has turned back into lead, they can't find and kill you.
Do daemons dream of electric sleep()?
> Are we talking x-ray laser sort of technology? Is 200,000 electron volts enough to do significant damage? Surface burns and radiation poisoning?
That's why we mount them on sharks' heads.
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
"Now if I could just find a way to bottle the power of human stupidity..."
it's called 'Beer'
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
You misspelled 'bricks of marijuana.'
Never shake hands with a man you meet in a fertility clinic.
Dr Ray Stantz: You know, it just occurred to me that we really haven't had a successful test of this equipment.
Dr. Egon Spengler: I blame myself.
Dr. Peter Venkman: So do I.
Dr Ray Stantz: Well, no sense in worrying about it now.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.
CLICK HERE for a portable fusion device that can help you Add Inches!!!
Cheesy Movie Night
But you either:
a) Just got added to the NSA watch list
b) Got added to Usama's 'People I need to meet' list.