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Investor Money Goes To Magic Lag Reducing Tech
Gamasutra reports on Texas technology company Bigfoot networks, which just received a $4 Million investment to develop a lag-reducing hardware PC card. From the piece: "According to the firm, it will bring to market the world's first Gaming Network Accelerator card, which will allow online gamers to play their favorite games with less lag. The company explained: 'Lag is the number one problem in online video games today, and Bigfoot Networks is the only company in the world whose sole mission is to fight lag', but gave no specific technical explanation about how it intends to do this." Greg Costikyan spells it out on the Games*Design*Art*Culture blog: "So yes, there might be a business here. But if so, it will be a business built largely on bullshit."
I wonder if these are the same people as the ones behind the magic cellphone boosting sticker.
Slashdot Burying Stories About Slashdot Media Owned
Maybe it's a regular old NIC, but part of the driver just shuts down all your P2P apps and torrents.
The card must have a reservoir of quantom-entangled particles that can be used to communicate instantaneously with the server (which has the other half of each pair). You'll probably have to subscribe to a service that ships you new bundles of particles each month to replace the bandwidth you use up. Be careful not to do anything important with it, or you'll violate causality, and cause all sorts of trouble for the universe...
I think it's obvious to all of us that the NIC is certainly not the weakest link in a connection.
It's obvious to intelligent people. It's not obvious to top-notch leveraging 24/7 TCO-oriented business-cunts (who synergize front-end e-commerce and harness B2B portals to recontextualize best-of-breed systems in holistic technologies).
Suck it, net haters. Beta hardware here. Using the special optimized ping utility they supplied with the board:
C:\>ping www.bigfootnetworks.com
Pinging www.bigfootnetworks.com [66.219.46.153] with 32 bytes of data:
Reply from 66.219.46.153: bytes=32 time=1ms TTL=47
Reply from 66.219.46.153: bytes=32 time=1ms TTL=47
Reply from 66.219.46.153: bytes=32 time=1ms TTL=47
Reply from 66.219.46.153: bytes=32 time=1ms TTL=47
Ping statistics for 66.219.46.153:
Packets: Sent = 4, Received = 4, Lost = 0 (0% loss),
Approximate round trip times in milli-seconds:
Minimum = 1ms, Maximum = 1ms, Average = 1ms
See? *Obviously* it works. Heck, it's so powerful and well-optimized that it works even if I take the new net card out!
Dragging people kicking and screaming into reality since 1996.
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"I'm VERY curious to how they plan to eliminate lag introduced by routers that they have no control over."
By getting the routers to support the NO_LAG bit, of course.
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.
Just turn off the porn !
Both Duke Nukem Forever and the Phantom console will have to be redesigned to incorporate this technology.
Anybody remember from chem what happens when you place two dissimilar metals against each other?
Uh, nothing, unless there's an electrolyte in contact with both. I think if the back of your computer is regularly getting splashed with salt water, you might want to think about moving it to another location...
So that's what Web 2.0 lets me do...
http://outcampaign.org/
Plus they obviously have never played any games:
Lag is the number one problem in online video games today
Punk-ass campers, script kiddies, and bitchy n00bs are the number 1-3 problems (pick your order) in online video games today. And have been for years now. I'd have to put lag fairly low on the list.
Velociraptor = Distiraptor / Timeraptor