MONKEYS USE ROBOTS TO FLING POO!!! GROSS!!! :) :)

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MONKEYS USE ROBOTS TO FLING POO!!! GROSS!!! :) :)

Posted by ryuzaki0 on Saturday April 1, 2006 @04:17AM from the technology-continues-to-impress dept.

Bananatree3 writes "A monkey has learned to control a remote arm to fling its own poo at researchers. From the article: " Researchers at Duke University have taught a lab monkey to control the movement of a robotic arm, using only signals from its brain. The monkey's immediate utilization of this new skill was to shower a group of neurobiologists with feces, according to the report by lead researcher Miguel Nicolelis.""

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Other Applications by shoemakc · 2006-04-01 04:18 · Score: 4, Insightful

Well duh, what else would you use a robotic arm for?

-Chris

--
--an unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys--
1. Re:Other Applications by gEvil+(beta) · 2006-04-01 04:33 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  I dunno about you, but I'd use one to scratch my ass.
  
  --
  This guy's the limit!
2. Re:Other Applications by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:47 · Score: 0
  
  Yeah, but flinging poo at researchers from Duke University is a pretty irresistable proposition. They are the devil after all.
3. Re:Other Applications by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:49 · Score: 0
  
  If I use the robotic arm to pleasure myself, is it robot sex or just a really exotic form of masturbation?
4. Re:Other Applications by mobby_6kl · 2006-04-01 05:06 · Score: 2, Insightful
  
  I'd use it to give myself a stranger...
5. Re:Other Applications by Alan+Reynolds · 2006-04-01 07:23 · Score: 1
  
  Once again Duke University leads the nation in proving that humans, monkeys and students have more in common than previously suspected.
6. Re:Other Applications by unitron · 2006-04-01 07:48 · Score: 1
  
  "Once again Duke University leads the nation in proving that humans, monkeys and students have more in common than previously suspected."
  Is the above a comment about
  (a) The poo-flinging robot arm story?
  (b)Krzyzewskiville and the Cameron Crazies?
  (c) Their lacrosse team?
  
  --
  I see even classic Slashdot is now pretty much unusable on dial up anymore.
7. Re:Other Applications by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 12:35 · Score: 0
  
  I gotcher poo-flinging robotic arm pony right HERE, asshats! (OMG, LOL etc., ad nauseum)
  Sincerely yours,
  Josie and the Pussycats
8. Re:Other Applications by fbjon · 2006-04-02 02:54 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  Well duh, what else would you use a robotic arm for?
  Fling chairs.
  
  --
  True confidence comes not from realising you are as good as your peers, but that your peers are as bad as you are.
9. Re:Other Applications by Alan+Reynolds · 2006-04-02 08:26 · Score: 1
  
  Unfortunately, futher analysis of each of your options a, b and c leads to thinking the answer must be all three.
well... by alphastryk · 2006-04-01 04:19 · Score: 0

it is a monkey...isnt that all they do anyways?
1. Re:well... by dr_dank · 2006-04-01 04:37 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  it is a monkey...isnt that all they do anyways?
  
  No, they masturbate too.
  
  --
  Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
2. Re:well... by symbolic · 2006-04-01 05:14 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  Don't be so quick to judge - one did manage to get into the whitehouse....
3. Re:well... by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 05:17 · Score: 0
  
  do they really?
4. Re:well... by Not_Wiggins · 2006-04-01 05:25 · Score: 1
  
  it is a monkey...isnt that all they do anyways?
  
  No, they masturbate too.
  
  I suppose in that way they're not so different from your average /. poster.
  
  Oh... doh!
  
  --
  Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie!" until you can find a rock.
A monkey story with a researcher named Miguel by yogikoudou · 2006-04-01 04:19 · Score: 1

Yet Another Mono Article ?
1. Re:A monkey story with a researcher named Miguel by Kelson · 2006-04-01 06:18 · Score: 1
  
  Well, it doesn't *say* the arm was programmed using C#, but you never know...
!!!!!!!bah by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:20 · Score: 0

3RD POST!!!!!!!! or whatever... like it could really get more inane
That's great... by Paulo's+News · 2006-04-01 04:22 · Score: 2, Funny

But was it one of those cuuuuute pink monkeys?

--
Paulo's News: Bringing You the Best of the Mainsternative Media
Still a ways to go... by shoemakc · 2006-04-01 04:22 · Score: 1

Yeah well, when they finally have the monkeys flying helicopters and hanging with Matthew Broderick then i'd be impressed.

-Chris

--
--an unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys--
1. Re:Still a ways to go... by mumblingrepublican · 2006-04-01 07:02 · Score: 1
  
  Attach the poo flinging robotic arm to a helicopter and monkeys will fly...
  
  --
  If it can't be done wrong... it can't be done.
erotic by Tarmas · 2006-04-01 04:23 · Score: 5, Funny

hands-free auto-erotic stimulation

This might actually come in useful. At least until they fix Google Romance, because all it's giving me now is a bunch of 404 errors.

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Signature has left the building.
Move along. by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:23 · Score: 3, Funny

That is definitely not the droid I'm looking for.
Can we hire him? by kratei · 2006-04-01 04:24 · Score: 1

If he will work for bananas, I'd gladly pay him to sling poo at CmdrTaco.
It doesn't get any better then this by shoemakc · 2006-04-01 04:25 · Score: 4, Funny

It's saturday morning and i'm sitting here in a towel making comments about a story on flinging monkey poo. I'd like to think that 30 years from now I'll remember today as the day my life peaked.

-Chris

--
--an unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys--
1. Re:It doesn't get any better then this by inode_buddha · 2006-04-01 04:30 · Score: 1
  
  " I'd like to think that 30 years from now I'll remember today as the day my life peaked."
  Don't worry; I'll probably remember even if you forget. As far as peaking, it probably did.
  
  --
  C|N>K
2. Re:It doesn't get any better then this by erbmjw · 2006-04-01 04:40 · Score: 1
  
  The mental image you have burned onto my brain with those very words may take thirty years of hard-core drinking to burn away! :D
3. Re:It doesn't get any better then this by Walt+Dismal · 2006-04-01 12:43 · Score: 1
  
  You will. It did.
  But at least we'll treasure this moment together, forever.
I *heart* Slashdot on April Fools Day! by zingbot · 2006-04-01 04:31 · Score: 1

So much
From whom did the Duke group obtain the grant? by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:31 · Score: 0

This has all the hallmarks of a Ximian funded project...
I for one... by thomasdz · 2006-04-01 04:35 · Score: 2, Funny

I, for one, welcome our new poo-flinging robot monkeys

--
Karma: Excellent. 15 moderator points expire sometime.
1. Re:I for one... by thomasdz · 2006-04-01 04:38 · Score: 1
  
  Damn, I forgot to add "overlords"
  
  --
  Karma: Excellent. 15 moderator points expire sometime.
2. Re:I for one... by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 05:04 · Score: 0
  
  I, for one, welcome our new robotic-arm poo-flinging monkey overlords.
  
  in soviet russia the poo flings monkeys at you!
  
  In korea only the old use robotic arm poo flinging monkeys.
  
  To keep this on topic OMG ponies!!1!!11!!one!! 3
Is his name ..... wait for it...... by 100+Percent+Troll · 2006-04-01 04:36 · Score: 0

Albert Pooholes!

LOL DUDES!!!!
Subtle.. by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 04:37 · Score: 0

That's all I can say about the articles todaty :)
have another glass of poo, Taco by bushboy · 2006-04-01 04:39 · Score: 1

Hmmm, taco has taken this 1/1/2006 to the poo extreme - have another gallon of beer on the house.

OMG, Pink Ponys Eating Monkey Poo ! - Cute !

--
A slashdotting - you get the stick first and then the carrot !
this is great. by atarione · 2006-04-01 05:02 · Score: 2, Funny

I salute researchers working on this age old problem of how can a Paralyzed monkey still huck poo.

personally i'm working on a robotic couch shredder for disabled cats

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actually I am happy to see you, however that is in fact a banana in my pocket.
THE INTERNET IS SERIOUS BUSINESS by Tatsh · 2006-04-01 05:03 · Score: 1

you guys here at slashdot need to get some originality.
Ah ha! by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 05:06 · Score: 0

That's our plan for Iran!
Good that April 1-st... by suv4x4 · 2006-04-01 05:23 · Score: 1

.. is just once a year, because I can hardly take more caps-only text with tons of exclamation marks and smilies.
Old News by dinojemr · 2006-04-01 05:33 · Score: 1

This article is from 2003. How can Slashdot claim to be "The Nuts and Volts of News for Nerds" when they post news from several years ago?
On the shoulders of giants... by rchatterjee · 2006-04-01 05:42 · Score: 1

Dr. Miguel Nicolelis is obviously building upon the pioneering fecal projectile research of Dr. Hu Flung Poo.
OMG PONIES!!! by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 05:44 · Score: 1, Funny

Click here for ponies.

Note: This is NOT work safe.
It might be safer to leave him with a robotic arm by Shivetya · 2006-04-01 05:52 · Score: 0

Monkeys, especially chimps, are fine and cute when they are young. When they get to be adult age they may still look cute but their damn dangerous to be around, especially if they get into a mood. Most adults you see will have some of their teeth remove to reduce some of the danger.

Flinging poo is about the nicest thing a mad monkey will do to you. First rule I learned, don't get near their cage, especially if they are motioning you to do so. They can put of the cutest expressions when all their intent is pure malice.

Give them robot arms, you might be able to at least break its grasp.

Back to the article, how hard can it be for a monkey to learn to throw poo anyway? Politicians do it all the time.

--
* Winners compare their achievements to their goals, losers compare theirs to that of others.
But can they? by warrior_s · 2006-04-01 05:53 · Score: 1

The monkey's immediate utilization of this new skill was to shower a group of neurobiologists with feces
But can they throw chairs.. errrr wait.. someone else already does that.
APRIL FOOLS! by Eideteker · 2006-04-01 05:55 · Score: 1

APRIL FOOLS!

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sic
Please end this by Anonymous Coward · 2006-04-01 06:10 · Score: 0

I'm actually getting really fed up with UPPERCASE/OMG/LOL/:) posts that keep appearing today. I hope it's going to end soon.
Did anyone else see..... by folky15 · 2006-04-01 06:37 · Score: 1

...the ad in the upper right corner of the linked-to page??? The Asian woman in the bright pink shirt??? just curious
Amazing Brain Powered Appendages. by Domo-Sun · 2006-04-01 06:46 · Score: 1

It's Saturday morning and I'm sitting here in a towel, and I'm peaked. Would you like a peek?

I moved it only by using my brain power. Thanks, science.
Re:It might be safer to leave him with a robotic a by unitron · 2006-04-01 07:53 · Score: 1

"Back to the article, how hard can it be for a monkey to learn to throw poo anyway? Politicians do it all the time."
As a matter of fact the monkeys at Duke learned to do it from watching Jesse Helms campaign ads.

--
I see even classic Slashdot is now pretty much unusable on dial up anymore.
Monkey Pride by beautiful+leper · 2006-04-01 07:55 · Score: 1

unfortunatly the monkey was probobly flinging pooh out of resentments for the pain of being a test monkey. I'm not against animal testing but monkey do resent it. Cral Saygon said when he visitied a test lab when he entered with the main scientist the monkey banged their cages in disgust the way prisoners would when the boss of a prison comes in. The monkeys know who the bad guys are. And if I were a human in an experiament where I had no choice I would probobly sling shit at my captors as well. But there is no alternitive when testing the technologies I guess... I think all mamals that share neocortex's with the human race deserve some sort of comforts. There should be a science devoted in how to comfort animals. What is that vetnarian science?