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J.J. Abrams To Direct New 'Star Trek' Film

Tycoon Guy writes "TrekToday reports that Paramount has asked 'Lost' creator J.J. Abrams to direct a new 'Star Trek' film. The movie will be set at Starfleet Academy and will feature younger versions of James T. Kirk and Spock, chronicling their first meeting at the Academy and their first outer space mission. The movie is set for a 2008 release and will apparently be one of Paramount's biggest projects for the year."

11 of 482 comments (clear)

  1. Sooooo.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    So it's Harry Potter in space then?

  2. Desperation by Gryle · · Score: 5, Funny

    I was going to post a joke about Star Trek: The Beginning of the End, but then I realized that happened a long time ago. Paramount has gone beyond running Star Trek into the ground, at this point they're trying to get blood from a stone. Then again, with Spock's intellect, perhaps we can finally figure out all of the secrets on that darned island.

    --
    Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not entirely sure about the universe - Einstein
  3. Yousa sayin wesa gonna die? by TK2216UKG · · Score: 5, Funny

    Past experience would suggest that we should be wary of franchise prequels where principal characters have sidekicks with funny ears.

    --

    - Jonathan :)

    No tuna is safe.

  4. Bones! Tell ME about the NEW _Star_ _Trek__ movie! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Bones: The horse... Its DEAD Jim!

    Spock: I concur with the doctor. There is a 97% probability that this movie will suck.

    Scotty: If ah tol' ya one I tol' ya a shoushand times, I'm not a miracle worker. Jus' let 'er rest in peace!

  5. Star Trek meets Revenge of the Nerds by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Leaked preliminary script:

    Cadet Kirk: Cadet Scott, how long until you tap into the visual sensors in the women's shower?
    Cadet Scott: It'll be at least an hour. I can nay change the laws of physics.
    Cadet Kirk: That hot freshman, Janice Rand is due in the showers in 5 minutes.
    Cadet Scott: Janice Rand!!! I'll have it done with 2 seconds to spare or I'm not a half-sloshed stereotype.
    Cadet Kirk: Good man! Do it and you can have any job you want when I'm captain of the fleet flagship.
    Cadet Spock: Normally I would point out that the risks do not justify these actions... but that Janice Rand would bring on Ponn Farr in an Andorian. Perhaps you should try cross circuiting to B, Cadet Scott.
    Cadet McCoy: Can you tie in my medical tricorder so I have a record for future... umm, anatomy study?
    Cadet Scott: Do it yourself, pervert.
    Cadet McCoy: I'm a medical student not a pornographer!!!
    Cadet Scott: All right, all right.

  6. I've got the title by goombah99 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Trek and Trekker: When Kirk met Spock.

    --
    Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
    1. Re:I've got the title by tillerman35 · · Score: 4, Funny
      How about:
      1. Dude, Where's my Starship?
      2. JT and Spock go to White Castle IV in the Delta Quadrant
      3. Starfleet Police Academy MMDCCCXIII
      4. Extraterrestrial House
      5. Phillips Insists You Watch This Long Commercial From Our Sponsors Without Skipping To The Part Where You Get To See The Title Of This Movie Don't Touch That Remote It Won't Work Anyway Stay Seated Do Not Go Get A Soda Or Unit Will Pause Playback Until Your Uniq Embedded RFID-Chip and Infrared Signatures Are Detected By Sensors Trek - The DCMA Mandatory Voyage
  7. Re:Starfleet Academy? by Vinnie_333 · · Score: 4, Funny
    1. The Star Trek equivalent of Animal House. Crazy co-eds, the antics of Star Fleet Academy's most crazy frat house

    Sounds more like a series of videos. Star Fleet Academy Girls Gone Wild.

    --

    "We shall party like the Greeks of old! You know the ones I mean." - HedonismBot
  8. *tap* "Is this thing on?" by UberOogie · · Score: 5, Funny

    "You, there. Get off the corpse. We've warned you about this already."

    --
    "Enough of this wretched, whining monkey life." -- Marcus Aurelius, _Meditations_, Book 9, 37
  9. Jim Abrahams and David Zucker? by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 5, Funny

    When I first glanced at the article I thought it said "Abrahams", as in Jim Abrahams and David Zucker of "Airplane!" fame. I think they should be the ones doing this movie and rename it "Starship!".

    --
    It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  10. Re:I like this idea by Lumpy · · Score: 4, Funny

    but this is going to go bad fast.

    next year we will have "startrek kids" and then Startrek babies"

    Spock,Kirk and Kaahn ride their hover-tricycles around the neighborhood going where "no 4 year old has gone before"

    It will be "rugrats" set in the Star Trek universe.

    I can hear sci-fi fans puking all across the country at that thought.

    --
    Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.