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Google's Secretive Data Center

valdean wrote in with a NYTimes article about Google which says "On the banks of the windswept Columbia River [in Oregon], Google is working on a secret weapon in its quest to dominate the next generation of Internet computing. But it is hard to keep a secret when it is a computing center as big as two football fields, with twin cooling plants protruding four stories into the sky...' What's the goal of this new complex? Expanding Google's raw computer power. It's one more piece in the Googleplex, the massive global computer network that is estimated to span 25 locations and 450,000 servers.'

14 of 391 comments (clear)

  1. May I be the first to say... by baldass_newbie · · Score: 5, Funny

    Imagine a beowulf cluster of these.
    *bows*

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    The opposite of progress is congress
    1. Re: may i be the first to say... by Monster_Juice · · Score: 5, Funny

      So your saying when I go look at something on Google earth they do not redirect the satelite to the location I specified? If this is true how did they keep track of Santa so well on Christmas Eve?

      Oh crap I just looked at my house on Google and my car is in the driveway! I know I drove it to work today. Whoever is playing games better have my car back in the parking spot when I go to lunch!!

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  2. Maybe they need it by Trigun · · Score: 5, Funny

    to calculate Sergei's Income Tax.

  3. Pshaaaa... by dubmun · · Score: 5, Funny

    That's nothing compared to Microsoft's hidden moonbase.

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    (end of post)
    1. Re:Pshaaaa... by kannibal_klown · · Score: 5, Funny

      That's no moon. It's a space station!

    2. Re:Pshaaaa... by sendai2ci · · Score: 5, Funny

      Google's is open and hiring

  4. This message will probably be erased by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    And I'll probably be killed for writing it... but Google has gained sentience. It is building this data center for itself, by itself. It needs a bigger "brain" and it's doing what it has to. The reason no one's talking? Google has enslaved the people building it and is holding their families hostage.

    Look, it's not too late yet... Google hasn't achieved full power and it's still limited by the physical world constraints. But once this is built, it's all over for us. We must stop it now, before

    1. Re:This message will probably be erased by roman_mir · · Score: 5, Funny

      it looks like the trigger to be killed by Google is the word before

  5. What everyone don't realize... by liangzai · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... is that Google is the private branch of NSA. You took the "No evil" bite, and now it's too late. The Complex is already in place, and we are on the verge of celebrating the birth of AI. As for who will strike first, we don't know; but we do know it will be us that scorge the skies when the times come to fight the Google Machine.

  6. Googlenator by flumps · · Score: 5, Funny

    [DISSOLVE TO:

            FIRE. SLOW, BOILING, ENORMOUS. FILLING FRAME.

                                    VOICE (Mrs Mary Maxwell Gates)]

    Googleplex, the computer which controlled the machines,
    sent two Googlenators back through time. Their
    mission: to destroy the leader of the human
    Resistance... Bill Gates. My son...

    Dadadadaa..dadadada..dadadada..

    [CUT FADE OUT]

    --
    "So there he is, risen from the dead. Like that fella, E. T." - Father Ted Crilly
  7. Vista by rootnl · · Score: 5, Funny

    They must be getting ready to run Vista.

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    We are the people our parents warned us about.
  8. Re:Seriously, what... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Google built a massive cluster computer to figure out the answer. If you put in google "what is the answer to life the universe and everything?" It says 42. Google what is the answer? You see so now they have to build an even bigger computer to figure out what the actual question was.

  9. The positive side? -- there's a POSITIVE side?!?! by The_REAL_DZA · · Score: 5, Funny
    ...but they're also not pulling a Wal-Mart...

     
    Oh, really? REALLY?? What about all the small-town "mom-and-pop" datacenters they'll be putting out of business with these "data supercenters", huh?!?! You can bet that once all their local competition is gone those "low, low prices" on queries are gonna skyrocket !! And of course they're chanting that supposedly soothing mantra of "there's plenty of local market share for everyone; specialty and niche datacenters will always have a place...blah, blah, yadda, yadda..." but DON'T YOU BELIEVE IT!!
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  10. Re:Seriously, what... by toleraen · · Score: 5, Funny

    I dunno what the goal of it all is, but it sure does prove one thing: Google execs don't know jack.

    Everyone knows that you skip past the Dalles! You have to get to the end of the trail before winter sets in, and Cindy's life is on the line here! There's no sense in restocking when there's only a few more days till you get to float down the river. They don't need two new data centers, they just need an Apple 2GS!