Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Intel Pledges 80 Core Processor in 5 Years

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the thinking-of-the-gaming dept.

ZonkerWilliam writes "Intel has developed an 80 core processor with claims 'that can perform a trillion floating point operations per second.'" From the article: "CEO Paul Otellini held up a silicon wafer with the prototype chips before several thousand attendees at the Intel Developer Forum here on Tuesday. The chips are capable of exchanging data at a terabyte a second, Otellini said during a keynote speech. The company hopes to have these chips ready for commercial production within a five-year window."

10 of 439 comments (clear)

  1. Ok, it HAS to be said... by Daniel_Staal · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...Imagine a Beowolf cluster of those!

    (Runs in shame.)

    --
    'Sensible' is a curse word.
    1. Re:Ok, it HAS to be said... by NiceRoundNumber · · Score: 5, Funny

      ...Imagine a Beowolf cluster of those!

      I never petaflop I didn't like.

      --
      Diplomacy is the art of letting other people have your way.
    2. Re:Ok, it HAS to be said... by ePhil_One · · Score: 3, Funny
      Only maniacs are going to wait five years to buy a new computer because of this announcement.

      Personally I'm going to wait for 2013 when the 160 core CPU's are finally out. Only a fool will be in 5 years

      --
      You are in a maze of twisted little posts, all alike.
    3. Re:Ok, it HAS to be said... by Korin43 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Pfft.. 2003. I'm gonna wait until 2020 when they finally merge them all back into one fast core.

  2. So... by dark_15 · · Score: 3, Funny

    This will finally run Vista, right??? Maybe? Hopefully?

    --
    Unto the upright there arises light in the darkness...
    1. Re:So... by kfg · · Score: 5, Funny

      This will finally run Vista, right?

      And get here ahead of it, so we'll be ready.

      KFG

  3. Gillette Razor Joke.. by SevenHands · · Score: 5, Funny

    In other news, Gillette pledges a razor with 81 micro blades. 80 blades are individually controlled via Intel's new 80 core processor. The 81st blade is available just because..

  4. Re:Shame BeOS Died... by mindsuck · · Score: 3, Funny

    This 80-core processor would probably also benefit from the is_computer_on_fire() syscall available on BeOS.

    --
    --- I w00t, therefore I'm l33t.
  5. $$$ for Oracle by Henry+V+.009 · · Score: 5, Funny

    You fools! Do you have any clue how much Oracle licenses will cost for this thing?

  6. The More Things Change.... by ObsessiveMathsFreak · · Score: 3, Funny
    I'm gonna wait until 2020 when they finally merge them all back into one fast core.
    They'll call it a "Bose-Wintel condensate". Instructions will be sent to the single core, but there will be no way of distinguishing which of the merged cell cores the instructions was run on. This will play havoc with floating point precision, but as Intel commented, "most users don't need that kind of precision anyway".

    The condensated core will also be subject to the laws of quantum mechanics in that, before a program has finished running, there will be no way to know if it will crash or not. Microsoft plans to leverage this to further stablise their latest version of Windows. Security experts worried about the onboard "Quantum-Threading" technology redirecting portions of thread output randomly to other threads, were dismissed as not being "forward looking".

    Meanwhile, AMDs new 1W, 128 core, 4098bit chip with 1GB L2 cache retails for almost 50% higher than Intel's Bose-Wintel chips, and has seen sluggish sales since the arrival of the new technology, despite its lower running cost that the 5MW Intel chip. When asked for comment, AMD's spokesman added; "Ch@#&t!! What the f**k is wrong with you people!??! Our chips save you money!! F@#*&^g cheapskates!!!"

    Upon hearing the news, Linux founder and lead developer Linus Torvalds(51) said: "We're not rewriting the kernel for that monstrosity." Intel representative declared that the company was "dissapointed" in Torvald's remarks. Apple cofounder Steve Jobs(65), when asked whether Apple intended to release a the new Mac based on the chipset, declined to comment as he went about his daily 5km morning run. Apple pundits widely believe that the new Mac will run on a quad core Bose-Wintel Condensate, and to complement this will sport a blazing white, ultra smooth case made out of Bose-Einstien condensate, the fifth phase of matter.

    In a related story, Microsoft cofounder Bill Gates(65), assaulted a technology reporter at a company press conference disccusing the new chip. Details are sketchy, but reports mention that one of Mr Gates older quotes about appropriate amounts of computer memory was brought up. Remond police have declined to comment on the case.
    --
    May the Maths Be with you!