Scientists Find New Painkiller From Saliva

dptalia writes "Scientists have found a new pain killer based on human saliva. Apparently 1 gram of the new drug provides as much pain blocking as 3 grams of morphine. The drug blocks the breakdown of the body's natural pain killing mechanism. Scientists say the molecule is simple and synthesis is expected to be simple."

Comments

Make it stop!

[LiquidCoooled]

When the researchers injected a pain-inducing chemical into rats' paws, 1 gram of opiorphin per kilogram of body weight achieved the same painkilling effect as 3 grams of morphine.

Well wouldn't you say anything to make them stop spitting on you?

"No more, yes alright it works I'm not in pain anymore."

Moving out of cuckoo land, I have a twisted ankle after a fall yesterday should I hock a loogie onto it?

Re:Make it stop!

[jimbojw]

Apparently kissing does make it better.

I hope it's psychoactive

[DrSkwid]

'cos morphine rules !!

I was in hospital one time after an operation and I was on a self administered morhine drip. But it would only give 1mg every 2 minutes (or whatever is the appropriate dose). But the machine also logs how many times you press the button so the staff can see how much pain you think you're in.

So I wouldn't have to count, I pressed the button every time the track changed on my mp3 player. Best hospital visit evar!!!1

I was lying there one time, opened my eyes and the Everquest HUD was there. In the chat window I was being spammed with :

You need to go to the toilet.
You need to go to the toilet.
You need to go to the toilet.
You need to go to the toilet.

Eventually I went and everybody who spoke on the journey, their chat came up in the window.

It was ace.

When they checked the machine they asked me if I was in a lot of pain, I ust said "no I like the morphine" and we all had a laugh. Until they took it off me.

Then they gave me these awful morphine based tablets and they gave me a bad trip so I stopped taking them.

Re:I hope it's psychoactive

[djtachyon]

You know you waste your life on an MMO when ...

Saliva?

[onion2k]

Saliva is a painkiller? How come I have toothache then?

Re:Those poor rats

[jez9999]

The rats? What about those poor bacteria in the saliva, just being sacrificed so the scientists could make the painkiller? There were probably more bacteria in there, eradicated, than there were humans that ever lived!

Sweet

[Timesprout]

I am going to claim saliva addiction and start snogging every good looking girl I see for the rest of the afternoon.

Re:Those poor rats

[MightyYar]

I hate rats. I'll buy a product based on how many more rats they killed during testing then the nearest competitor.

Next up, little rat-like dogs. Can we require medical testing on those?

I'm completely against animal testing on cute little fuzzy bunnies and cool dogs, like golden retrievers. I'm against testing on some monkeys, but others you can go for it - like that little brown bastard that threw feces on me at the zoo. Give him monkey-AIDS.

Also, I never buy bug repellent that has been tested on mosquitoes. The slaughter must stop!

Re:3 grams of morphine? (!)

[Nakoruru]

Yes, but the dosage of freight train required is a lot bigger.

YES!

[Greyfox]

And here I thought no one understood the plight of the poor malaria mosquito! These once proud creatures roamed the plains by the billions and now due to human eradication programs and bats they're down to mere hundreds of millions! If this continues we could see the end of the malaria mosquito in our great-great-great-great-great grandchildren's time! We owe it to them to preserve this awesome predator! Look at all the contributions the malaria mosquito has brought to us! Without the malaria mosquito we wouldn't have gin and tonic! Without the malaria mosquito the colonial British would have had literally no opposition to taking over the world! We must all do our part to save the malaria mosquito!

As for the small rat-like dogs, I'm afraid they're pretty much worthless even for cruel and inhumane experiments. However, you can still feed them to coyotes. Coyotes are cool dogs like golden retrievers and they eat small rat-like dogs! They go through poodles like I go through popcorn. Yay coyotes! Alligators are no good though. Sure they eat small rat-like dogs and the occasional resident from Florida but they're cold blooded and you know they're trying to bring back the dominance of the dinosaur. I suggest we genetically engineer crocodiles to have warm blood and fur. That'd show them!