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Apple's Billion Dollar Patent & Other Stories From Patentland

Posted by Hemos on from the it's-time-to-get-your-learn-on dept.

DECS writes "It has been widely reported that Apple secured a patent worth a "billion dollars." According to a patent attorney involved in the issue, Apple will be "after every phone company, film maker, computer maker and video producer to pay royalties." The good news is that all the news reports were based on misleading hyperbole. " Don't let the title fool you; the essay is a good background on patents, the horror stories of some of them but also why companies feel compelled to seek patents as a business "safety" precaution.

8 of 130 comments (clear)

  1. So they did it? by DorkusMasterus · · Score: 5, Funny

    Apple patented porn?

    1. Re:So they did it? by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 5, Funny

      Not quite, but they did manage to get a patent on the clickable touch sensitive nipple interface.

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      liqbase :: faster than paper
    2. Re:So they did it? by agent+dero · · Score: 2, Funny

      what about it?

      --
      Error 407 - No creative sig found
    3. Re:So they did it? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      "Squeeze the sides to launch exposé and more"

  2. Press Releases by The+Zon · · Score: 4, Funny

    "Apple Attorney Secures Patent For Film, Phones, Computers" If somebody had actually pulled this off, putting out a press release seems almost humble.

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    Some attitudes replaced or by cgi optimizes
  3. The Simpsons already did it. by FunkeyMonk · · Score: 3, Funny

    Did Apple patent the Billion Dollar Bill?

  4. apple patent by inKubus · · Score: 4, Funny

    This is a novel method of storing data on light and color intensities of a frame of reference, captured with a lens system and matrix of light sensitive transistors. The resulting data is stored in a file called an "Image".

    OR worse

    This is a novel method of representing nothing. In the past, nothing was always something. We propose a special character that represents nothing (the lack of something) to be used in communication purposes. We shall call this character the "zero."

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    Cool! Amazing Toys.
  5. Thay Did It! (sic) by MrSquishy · · Score: 3, Funny
    phone company, film maker, computer maker and video producer
    Hmm... phone company, film maker, computer maker and video producer.
    It also doesnt exist in "Prior Art".

    My god, they have found 3) ????:
    3) Patent the letter "E"
    4) Profit!