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Global Warming Only a Theory, Says School Board
BendingSpoons writes "A Seattle school board has placed a moratorium on screenings of 'An Inconvenient Truth', having found its subject matter too controversial. Echoing the language of the evolution debate, the school board found that students must be told that global warming is only a theory and presented with an opposing viewpoint. The ban was prompted by the complaints of a parent: '"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher," said Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven who also said that he believes the Earth is 14,000 years old. "The information that's being presented is a very cockeyed view of what the truth is ... The Bible says that in the end times everything will burn up, but that perspective isn't in the DVD."'"
When global warming isn't a theory anymore, it will kind of be like hell on earth. So I guess the bible is right?
- Aetheral Research -
Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven who also said that he believes the Earth is 14,000 years old.
The fundamentalist Christians are out breeding the rest of us. We must catch up.
Libertarian Leaning Political Discussion Forum.
Washington, Gore, the whole lot. We all know that the truth about both the age of the earth and cause of global warming lies in the truth as told by His Noodleness on high.
Ramen.
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No it's like saying San Francisco is like San *Serif* because they both name San in their name.
And the Flying Spaghetti Monster ? Uh ? What about His Noodly ? Arrrrhhhh!!!!
"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore."
Use in the following way:
"X doesn't belong in Y, and neither does Al Gore."
Examples:
"Cheese don't belong in hot dogs, and neither does Al Gore."
"Riker doesn't belong in the captain's chair, and neither does Al Gore."
*Note that verb tense can be changed at the leisure of the poster.
Here's to hoping that this one spreads better than the "Except in Nebraska" one of Steve Ballmer fame.
Jesus wasn't a teacher, what makes you think *he's* correct?
The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has evidence that global warming is actually caused by the shrinking number of pirates since 1800. I feel that students should be made aware of this in their science classes and encouraged to think about becoming pirates to aid the situation.
> "What if they're teaching abiogenesis?"
That we all came from little robot dogs? Wait, no, that's *aibo*genesis...
Chris Mattern
Here is the solution to Global Warming...
It is reasonably well known that atmospheric particulate pollution reduces the amount of the Sun's radiation which reaches the surface and is also able to reflect more radiation back into space. Such effects, called "Nuclear Winter" are theorized but there is very strong evidence that huge volcanic eruptions do chill the whole planet dispite putting out an extremely large volume of greenhouse gases.
So what can we do to reverse Global Warming?
1. Remove particle filters, especially ESD-type filters, from our coal and oil burning power stations. This will help increase the amount of fine particles in the atmosphere and will also help reduce carcenogenic dioxin output from those power stations.
2. Switch to Diesel! Our petrol/gas vehicles just don't put out enough carbon particles. Electric vehicles are ok as long as the electricity is sourced from a coal or oil burning power station which has already had its filters removed.
3. Burn waste in your back yard! Stop filling landfills and burn the junk. This reduces the amount of land wastefully used to store our waste and help put more particles in the atmosphere. Burying waste only leads to greenhouse gas emissions while they decompose.
We have unwittingly been doing well for ourselves - globally, the amount of radiation reaching the Earth's surface has been reduced by more than 10% over the last 50 years due to atmospheric particle pollution. Okay, there are a few downsides, a few impoverished nations will suffer crop failure when the global weather patterns change but we are saving the planet from becoming another Venus!
(I wonder if anyone will take this seriously? Well, there is some valid science. Look up "global dimming". LMAO)
No sig. Move along - nothing to see here.
Interesting.
I am always open to new ideas my mind has previously been too closed to perceive.
You seem to believe the "answer" is readily perceptible, and is reducible to a handful of truths.
If so, why not simply list that handful here? Yes, I'm sure that if you are correct that these are in fact "truths" then a mere list will constitute merely the pinprick of the point of a pin on the top of an iceberg of weighty profundity, so perhaps you think neither I nor others would benefit from your list.
But why not try? Merely state the list, and let us take it from there, contemplating therefrom.
Latin is just a theory.
'"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher," said Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven who also said that he believes the Earth is 14,000 years old.
C'mon, this has to be a put-on. One man's life can't be this unintentionally funny.
Literalism isn't a form of humor, it's you being irritating.
Exactly, hasn't the president ever played Risk? That whole area was usually a bitch to hold. I preferred to go Australia -> Asia -> America/Europe.
My rantings, only longer and with better spelling..
""Condoms don't belong in school(.)" said Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven"
According to him, they apparently don't belong anywhere.
Sure, get back to us when you've come up with a global weather control system.
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That's a bullshit number. Who the hell pulled THAT out of their ass. I've done the research, and Bush killed 654,955 people. Personally. With a roundhouse kick.
No, wait, that was Chuck Norris. Sorry.
Don't piss off The Angry Economist
Yeah, academics notice all these languages like Portuguese, Spanish, French, Italian and Romanian sound a lot like each other, and from this they decide that there must have been an older language from which the different languages "evolved". Where's the proof? It's just a bunch of liberal professors making more and more tenuous theories in their ivory towers.
It's much more likely that Portugues, Spanish, etc. is just how God decided these people should talk when He brought down the tower of Babel. We've got His word as proof that the events at Babel really did happen, although I must admit that there is no list of languages in the Bible. But why would God decide to first make people speak this hypothetical "Latin" language, and then make them evolve into talking other languages? It makes no sense, we all know that God hates evolution.