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British Military Deploys Skynet

Posted by CowboyNeal on from the have-you-seen-sarah-connor dept.

rowleyrw writes "The BBC are reporting, 'The British military is set to take one of its most significant steps into the digital age with the launch of the first Skynet 5 satellite. The spacecraft will deliver secure, high-bandwidth communications for UK and "friendly" forces across the globe.' It's not yet the Skynet of Terminator, but how long before it becomes self aware?"

37 of 172 comments (clear)

  1. With a name like Skynet... by StringBlade · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...what can go wrong?

    --
    ...and that's the way the cookie crumbles.
    1. Re:With a name like Skynet... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      What the hell is wrong with British people these days?

      "Pip-pip! What should we call our new military satellite system?"

      "Jolly good, ol' chap! Let us name it after a fictional military system that runs off the rails and destroys humanity!"

      "Good show! Jolly good! Time for crumpets and tea! After we install cameras in everyone's bottoms!"

      "Aaaah, yes! The bottom cameras will be smashing! They will also broadcast GPS to the government. What should we name them?"

      "Brilliant! Jolly good! Pip-pip! Let's call them AIDS! That's a catchy name!"

      "Smashing! Brilliant! Jolly good! Everyone will come to us to get AIDS! We will give them AIDS! AIDS in their bottoms! And they will feel happy and safe from terrorists now that they have AIDS!"

      "Don't you mean 'safe from terror'?"

    2. Re:With a name like Skynet... by WhyDoYouWantToKnow · · Score: 4, Funny

      Would that be Arse Installed Digital Surveillance?

      --
      "Oh drat these computers, they're so naughty and so complex. I could pinch them."
      Marvin the Martian
    3. Re:With a name like Skynet... by malsdavis · · Score: 5, Informative

      ""Jolly good, ol' chap! Let us name it after a fictional military system that runs off the rails and destroys humanity!"

      Uh, the British Skynet system pre-dates the original terminator movie by about 15 years.

    4. Re:With a name like Skynet... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      In other news, NASA has developed a new computer that will guide the next space mission. Codenamed HAL 1000.

    5. Re:With a name like Skynet... by Instine · · Score: 2, Funny

      I find your tone frightfully vulgar. If you were a decent chap, you'd already be apologising, but as you clearly are not, I'll be forced to chastise you in the only becoming fashion your primitive culture can comprehend. Biglesworth, release the centinals!

      --
      Because you can - or because you should?
    6. Re:With a name like Skynet... by thrawn_aj · · Score: 2, Funny

      What the hell is wrong with British people these days? "Pip-pip! What should we call our new military satellite system?" "Jolly good, ol' chap! Let us name it after a fictional military system that runs off the rails and destroys humanity!" Hey, at least it ain't "Star Wars" :P
    7. Re:With a name like Skynet... by merikari · · Score: 3, Funny

      Uh, the British Skynet system pre-dates the original terminator movie by about 15 years.

      Yup, that's only one of the problems of time travel.

      --
      My other SIG is a Sauer.
    8. Re:With a name like Skynet... by ATMD · · Score: 2, Funny

      Hmm, I don't know - "arse" certainly has more of a ring to it...

      --
      Nobody else has this sig.
  2. Goddammit by jjthegreat · · Score: 5, Insightful

    There has got to be a stop to these summaries ending with a question. Haha, terminator, we get it thanks. Next!

  3. Speaking as an American citizen in the UK..... by Caspian · · Score: 3, Funny

    Someone with Ahh-nold's accent would stick out even more here than in the States.... ;)

    So I think we're safe.

    --
    With spending like this, exactly what are "conservatives" conserving?
  4. Bandwidth by baffled · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Anyone have an idea of how much bandwidth it provides?

    1. Re:Bandwidth by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      I bet it would be equivalent to about T-1000.

    2. Re:Bandwidth by JacksonG · · Score: 5, Interesting

      The published figure is approx 700 MHz of satellite bandwidth availible in total. The bandwidth of the individual trunks are subject to classificiation under the official secrets act. I actually worked on skynet5 and the list of bits of information that is classified is ridiculous but I can say that it's nowhere near as much bandwidth as you might think.

      J

      --
      I am not a Frog. I am a Free Womble!
    3. Re:Bandwidth by HarmlessScenery · · Score: 5, Informative

      I also worked on Skynet 4 and 5. I'd have to disagree with the comment that the amount of information that is classified is 'ridiculous'. When you're talking about a system that all UK operations will be reliant on, you can't be too careful. In most cases, individual snippets of information might seem 'relatively harmless' in isolation, but combined with other 'relatively harmless' snippets of information can quickly reveal exploitable attack vectors on the system.

      As for the available bandwidth within the system - it's actually quite a complicated problem. That was one of the areas I studied. Knowing the power and frequency bands available is not enough to be able to determine a maximum data throughput on each channel.

      Different types of communications traffic use up frequency and power resources with different efficiencies. So the maximum data throughput varies - a lot - according to actual real world use. You also lose resources due to intermodulation products - which again vary widely with usage patterns.

      So when JacksonG says 'nowhere near as much as you might think' - it's probably less than that too ;)

  5. but does anyone have the hotline number to .... by 3seas · · Score: 4, Funny

    the california govenor.... he'll know what to do....

  6. Skynet is not new by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

    Note that this is the launch of Skynet 5. Skynet 1A was launched in 1969. See the Wikipedia article for more details.

  7. How long before it becomes self-aware? by Frozen+Void · · Score: 4, Insightful

    When someone designs an autonomous implementation,equipped with AI.

  8. British Skynet by ettlz · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Right, then, old chap: I'll need your clothing, your wellies, and your motorbike, if you please."

    1. Re:British Skynet by Bogtha · · Score: 4, Funny

      "I'll be back in a jiffy."

      --
      Bogtha Bogtha Bogtha
  9. Swami says... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful
    How long...?

    About as long as it will be until the average slashdottie stops thinking of the world in terms of the B movies he's seen. In other words, don't hold your breath...

    1. Re:Swami says... by David_Shultz · · Score: 3, Interesting

      B movies? B MOVIES?

      Terminator 2 was, according to many sources, one of the greatest movies of all time. It was in my opinion the greatest action movie of all time. And, it dealt with the topics of artificial intelligence and time travel better than most other movies sci-fi movies. On top of that, Cameron's presentation of the dichotomy between hard/soft AI as presented between the T800 and the T1000 was staggeringly prescient -it mirrors exactly the development that occurred in the actual world of AI, as research progressed from classical, rigid AI to the more fluid, behavior based AI.

      The film tackles time travel, artificial intelligence, consciousness, human emotion, human nature, fate versus free will, and other topics. If you are willing to carry the ideas it presents to you, there is a lot of meaningful content there to think about. If you aren't willing to put in that intellectual effort, you get an incredible action movie anyways. But the philosophy is there. For example, John Conner asks the Terminator if it hurts when he gets shot, to which the Terminator responds "I sense injuries -the data could be called pain." There is a lot of discussion that could evolve from this single line. In what way is his "pain" different from our "pain", for example? The character's albeit brief lines are charged with content "I know now why you cry, but it's something I could never do" -we are given a glimpse into the mind of a Terminator, who we now know is capable of comprehending human emotion at an entirely logical level.

      Another line: "it's in your nature to destroy yourselves" Again, there is so much discussion that can evolve from this line, using the film as a backdrop. This is the fate versus free will theme manifested on the social level. The main theme of the movie is the characters attempting to forge their destiny (freewill) in the face of fate, but we are also confronted with the fate of perhaps humankind. This movie really can make you think, if you are willing to. Another line, "The unknown future rolls toward us, and for once I face it with a sense of hope. Because if a machine -a Terminator- can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too."

      I could go on, but I don't think I could do the movie justice. Go watch it -I'm serious- and appreciate the fact that you basically get non-stop action coupled with serious, thought provoking philosophy. Terminator 2 is an intelligent, action packed, brilliantly directed epic.

  10. Self awareness? by pandrijeczko · · Score: 4, Funny

    Let's start by getting Tony Blair and his Labour government cronies self aware first...

    --
    Gentoo Linux - another day, another USE flag.
  11. Physical security? by solevita · · Score: 3, Informative

    Its technologies have also been designed to resist any interference - attempts to disable or take control of the spacecraft - and any efforts to eavesdrop on sensitive communications.

    I guess this is the sort of thing the Chinese were thinking about when they recently destroyed that sat. Information security is all well and good, but useless if it can just be shot down.
  12. Re:Skynet 5? What about the other four? by flooey · · Score: 2, Informative

    And why, why, why would you call it Skynet? Seriously?

    Probably because the original SkyNet satellite was launched in 1971. So, they probably called it SkyNet because it's building a communications network in the sky :)

  13. Re:Karma be damned by blowdart · · Score: 2, Funny

    (Give me a break, in all my years here I don't think I've *ever* posted about overlords, Soviet Russia, or hot grits on petrified Natalie Portman)

    You're new here then?

  14. No, I'm New Here by New+Here · · Score: 5, Funny

    No, I'm New Here

    1. Re:No, I'm New Here by dswartz · · Score: 5, Funny

      So how many years have you been waiting to use that one?

  15. International Sock Puppet Corporation Deploys HAL by dswartz · · Score: 2, Insightful

    "The International Sock Puppet Corporation is announcing, 'The International Sock Puppet Corporation is set to take one of its most significant steps into the digital age with the launch of HAL. This sock puppet is made of soft luxurious cashmere and will deliver comfort and style to the user and "friends" across the globe.' It's not yet the HAL of 2001, but how long before can read lips!?" 'Look this system is going to rev 80.22.6 from rev 80.22.5 and it has the same name as something ominous I have seen in a movie!' I mean seriously. This summary is just silly.

  16. Did it strike anyone else by aztektum · · Score: 5, Funny

    That August 4th, 2007 is ten years from the date the movies specified? Coincidence. Or did the time travel just screw up everyone's memories?

    If you'll excuse me, I have a bunker in my backyard to finish.

    --
    :: aztek ::
    No sig for you!!
  17. Self Aware by Rik+Sweeney · · Score: 4, Funny

    but how long before it becomes self aware?

    Probably when it starts posting insightful comments on Slashdot.

    It'll start posting on Digg first but... well, you know...

    --
    Summation 2
    1. Re:Self Aware by jamstar7 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      but how long before it becomes self aware?

      Probably when it starts posting insightful comments on Slashdot.

      Oh, in that case, we're perfectly safe.

      --
      Understanding the scope of the problem is the first step on the path to true panic.
  18. No Guns = Dull Terminator Film by MrSteveSD · · Score: 3, Interesting

    It would be a bit of a dull film since there are really no guns in the UK. You can't want into a shop and buy some and most police don't carry them. It would be down to fist fights or knife fights.

  19. Secure... by The+Living+Fractal · · Score: 3, Informative

    Forget the stupid terminator reference to something that's been around a lot longer than the Terminator series. I want to know how long before the 'secure' transmissions are decrypted by some black-hat hackers in North Korea and one time pads become a requirement. Also I hope they've cooked up some excellent misinformation to sift into the normal transmissions.

    Anyone care to guess what kind of encryption they'll be using? Something they cooked up for the job or something that's been out a while? I'm not a cryptographer. I am curious though, what kind of digital encryption is out there that's considered unbreakable?

    TLF

    --
    I do not respond to cowards. Especially anonymous ones.
  20. Re:Thanks for the conflict /. by jamstar7 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Do we want it running Linux?

    --
    Understanding the scope of the problem is the first step on the path to true panic.
  21. Re:Don't these guys watch any sci-fi? by Homr+Zodyssey · · Score: 2, Informative

    There would still be the Cybermen and the Borgs.

    Nerd police here. I'm going to have to ask you to come with me. You obviously don't belong. Any nerd worth his bytes would know that the plural of 'Borg' is 'Borg'. As in "We are Borg. You will be assimilated."

  22. Jesus H. Christ... by sm62704 · · Score: 2

    how long before it becomes self aware?

    Do you have the slightest hint of how a computer works? If you do, answer me this: how mant beads do I have to put on my abacus before it becomes self-aware?

    --
    mcgrew's razor: Never attribute to stupidity that which can be explained by greedy self-interest