Microsoft Claims a Billion Windows Installs by End of 2008
eldavojohn writes "Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer claimed yesterday that there will be a billion machines running Windows within a year. 'The install base of Windows computers this coming 12 months will reach 1 billion. If you stop and just think about that, parse that for a second, by the end of our fiscal year '08, there will be more PCs running Windows in the world than there are automobiles, which is at least to me kind of a mind-numbing concept.'"
Does that include reinstalls?
Kwisatz Haderach
Sell the spice to CHOAM
This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
ST. PETERSBURG - WarezOv Industries announced today a new initiative in partnership with Microsoft that promises to put shared web hosting on every desktop.
"With Microsoft's help, we have brought web hosting services to nearly one billion PCS across the Internet," announced WarezOv CEO dRO0m@t. "Windows allows us the opportunity to bring value-add to the customer."
WarezOv's suite of administration tools allows easy management of all aspects of web hosting, including DNS, mail services and -- most important -- failover. "By tapping into Window's remote API calls, WarezOv's tools can scale web hosting to nearly any degree, and make it easy for the hoster as well," said Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer. "This -- and their tool's ease of install -- is what Windows is all about."
Free Software Foundation president and founder Richard M. Stallman was unavailable for comment. "He's talking to Google about building something similar for GNU/Linux," said a source close to Stallman.
Carousel is a lie!
No chairs were harmed in the making of this press release.
At the bottom of the
A Microsoft billion. They use a similar system to calculate the amount of time remaining when installing a .msi.
Also note that he said "running". I highly doubt that claim. :-)
Of course, he could have meant "running" as in "with scissors".
What they're counting is the number of times WGA pops up to confirm that your copy of Windows is valid.
....
.... you like using the computer you paid for right? We'll fix you good if you don't comply."
It's just retarded how many times that fucking thing pops up.... Microsoft wants to double quadruple check or something....
User: "but you already checked!!!"
MS: "yes and we're going to check again, bend over please
Do not spread "09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0" over the internet, thank you.
Give it up. When I was at primary school in England in the mid-70's, the definition of a billion as 10^12 was already obsolete.
When the British government announces that they've spend a billion on this or squandered a billion on that, everybody knows they mean 10^9. It doesn't occur to anybody younger than eighty that they might mean 10^12.
You might have had a point in 1940. Now you're just being an arse. Hang on, is that you dad?
Must be the rest of the non-english-speaking world.
All the Brits I've asked say a Billion is 1,000,000,000.
But then the last Limey I quizzed couldn't tell me the correct color of Dennis the Menace's hair in old Blighty, so clearly he was an imposter.
Just think of the energy savings if they had made it the black screen of death.
They already have 1 billion Windows installations in China, all with the same activation key.
Population about 6-7 Billion now. So lets figure that only one in 6 is gullible enough to buy Windows.
.Net programmers will be useful we just need a lot of those little yellow school buses.
To do first line Tech Support they will need at least 250 Million people to answer phones with 'Is the powercord plugged in?" and "Hit Ctrl-alt-delete several times till it reboots" These are the lucky ones they will have jobs for life! [till somebody builds a Linux-based AI to use an Eliza strategy to answer calls]
We will also need a crack team of at least 50 Million Linux/Mac Users to mock Window Users full time. Honestly I think it pretty much have of the user base that engages in this. But these people will be trained professionals dammit! {I should start a magazine devoted to Pr0n and Windows Mockery, it will be bigger then Playboy, Penthouse and Southern Baptist Monthly. Talk about a wankfest)
Coders, well need lots of them. Coders can work for anybody C++ is universal as is Java. C# and
And Garbage Haulers, We're gonna need them badly!
Finally we'll need Al Gore. (Thats an obvious one)
Sorry about the writing. Robot fingers, you know? Cliff Steele in DOOM PATROL #23
I'm sorry, but a quote like that just makes me think of Dr. Evil from the Austin Powers movies.
Bill Gates: *with pinky curved up to lip* Gentlemen, we will have Windows Vista installed on ONE BEEELLIIION computers by the end of the year!
Steve Ballmer: *wearing an eyepatch due to a ricocheting chair leg accident* But Sir, that's.. that's just...
Bill Gates: Eeevil? *camera zooms in while dramatic music plays*
Official Heretic from the "Church of Global Warming". Proven right thanks to whistle blowers. AGW = Flat Earth Theory
Extreme Programming - Redundant Array of Inexpensive Developers
Had a dollar for everything I've heard that one he'd be as rich as Bill Gates.
Sorry about the writing. Robot fingers, you know? Cliff Steele in DOOM PATROL #23
to McDonalds. When was the last time you had a Big Mac? It may not be the most nutritious thing in the world, but at least it's TASTY. I have eaten many an XP installer CD, and I can assure you it is neither.
'Let me see... I had to reinstall Windows 12 times on my son's computer, 8 times on my Wife's computer, 5 times on my computer at work, 15 times on my dad's computer, and so on....
.. Jeez, that CD-R must be worn to the 'Mr Media' label by now!
Yeah, I can see how Microsoft can claim 1 billion installs - let's see them filter it out to "unique computers" and see where that number goes.'
"...there's really no open source offering that comes remotely close to...SQL Server 2005"
+5 Funny, anyone?
It's as if a billion computers all cried out at once in terror and said, "It appears you are being suddenly silenced. Cancel or allow?"
That's our life, the big wheel of shit. - The Fat Man, Blue Tango Salvage
1,000,000,000,000,000 reboots! Is it a zillion after trillions?
When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.
That's not working out so well either.
Idiot. That's a coffee cup holder. No wonder you're having problems.
just as healthy too