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How Not to Write a Cease-and-Desist Letter

Posted by ScuttleMonkey on from the love-seeing-bullies-get-bullied dept.

In our overly litigious society it seems that many companies are all too happy to fire off a cease-and-desist letter if they see something they don't like. Many times these letters end up online just causing further embarrassment for the company. One such company has decided to try scaring their targets out of this response by including a copyright notice for their cease-and-desist letter. Public Citizen has fielded one of these dumb letters and has invited them to try to assert their cease-and-desist copyright (which isn't even registered).

13 of 235 comments (clear)

  1. HOW NOT TO WRITE A SLASHDOT TROLL. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny


         

    1. Re:HOW NOT TO WRITE A SLASHDOT TROLL. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      FIST PROUST!

    2. Re:HOW NOT TO WRITE A SLASHDOT TROLL. by PitaBred · · Score: 4, Funny

      He was a gay frenchman, who knows, maybe he'd enjoy it...

      --
      My blog. Good stuff (when I remember to update it). Read it.
  2. Ssh! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't tell Darl about this.

    1. Re:Ssh! by the_humeister · · Score: 2, Funny

      Ssh is a registered trademark of SSH Communications Security. You will be hearing from our lawyers.

  3. Oy vey.... by Kierthos · · Score: 3, Funny

    Oh noes! Someone wrote something mean about my company on the internet! I gots to sue them!

    Please, God (or other available deity), strike these litigious dumbasses with your holy fire/hammer/lightning from the sky (as appropriate).

    --
    Mr. Hu is not a ninja.
    1. Re:Oy vey.... by Joe+Jay+Bee · · Score: 4, Funny

      Please, God (or other available deity), strike these litigious dumbasses with your holy fire/hammer/lightning from the sky (as appropriate).

      You forgot "noodle".

      --
      I write bullshit
  4. One Possible Reply.. by Zymergy · · Score: 5, Funny

    A Good comment posted from the original article:
    7. No License... No Reading by Todd on Oct 8th, 2007 @ 8:41am

    Dear Lawfirm,

    Regarding your recent letter containing copyrighted content, I seem to not have an appropriate license to read your letter. I sure wish I could respond to whatever allegations you claim, but that would require that I read your letter, of which I do not have a proper license to do.

    Sincerely,
    Your Victim

  5. Submission License by Nymz · · Score: 3, Funny

    All submissions sent to my email become my property, and reciept of your email shall consitute your acceptance of this agreement. Expect a couter-suit detailing your violation of my copyright, as I do not permit my letters to be sent via email. Thank you.

  6. Re:I already have a copyright... by Alain+Williams · · Score: 2, Funny

    You can't have a copyright on something generic, however you could have a patent on it -- at least in those countries that allow such stupidities.

  7. HAW! HAW! by msauve · · Score: 2, Funny

    the old trick of mailing a copy of something to yourself as soon as you've created it still works just like it always did. (Dated postmark.)
    I plan on mailing a bunch of (unsealed) manila envelopes to myself tomorrow. Then, in a couple of years, I'll retype one or two titles from the NYT bestsellers list, stuff them in an envelope, seal it, and sue.

    According to you, I'll have ironclad proof that they're infringing my copyright. I'll be rich!
    --
    "National Security is the chief cause of national insecurity." - Celine's First Law
  8. Re:Copyright registration by PitaBred · · Score: 1, Funny

    Screw you, hippie! Ad-hominem and strawman attacks are a completely legitimate tool in a debate! You're with the terrorists!

    --
    My blog. Good stuff (when I remember to update it). Read it.
  9. Proust in his first post wrote about wrote about - by wsanders · · Score: 2, Funny

    1) [nothing]

    2) "In Search of Lost Time Posting to /."

    --
    Give a man a fish and you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish, and he'll say "WHERE'S MY FISH, YOU IDIOT?"