Mom Blasts Ballmer Over Kid's Vista Experience

Lucas123 writes "While on stage at a Gartner's ITxpo conference today, Ballmer got an ear-full from the mother of a 13-year-old girl who said after installing Vista on her daughter's computer she decided only two days later to switch back to XP because Vista was so difficult. Ballmer defended Vista saying: 'Your daughter saw a lot of value'; to which the mother replied: 'She's 13.' Ballmer said that Vista is bigger than XP, and 'for some people that's an issue, and it's not going to get smaller in any significant way in SP1. But machines are constantly getting bigger, and [it's] probably important to remember that as well.' Says the mother: 'Good, I'll let you come in and install it for me.'"

Comments

funeral's saturday

[moderatorrater]

The mom's body was later found floating in a river. The cause of death: chair-related injuries.

Value = Gadgets

[langelgjm]

So the "value" that the woman's 13 year-old daughter saw were Vista's gadgets:

My daughter comes in one day and says, 'Hey Mom, my friend has Vista, and it has these neat little things called gadgets -- I need those.'

I'm glad the end-user is seeing so much value in Vista.

Yikes!

[Otter]

I can't say I'm looking forward to Mom's arrival in #gentoo...

Re:A lot of value...

[Tibor the Hun]

Quite clearly, you've never tried using gadgets. Gadgets are the paradigm-shift (I hope I can still use that word) we've all been waiting for.

Why I myself am about to ditch OS X in favor of gadget... err Vista.

If you can't see the insurmountable value of gadgets, and that their existence warrants a 7 year development cycle, multiple delays and feature reduction not to mention complete industry IT overhaul and user re-training, then, you sir are not a visionary, and should promptly log out of this site, and clear your history.

Good riddance I say!

Re:+1 Funny

[halcyon1234]

I think this article would have been funnier if it was as I first read it-- that STEVE'S Mom showed up and bitched him out.

Re:buy more chairs, Uncle Steve's coming over!

[griffjon]

User is complaining. Allow or Deny?

*click*

OS Wars

[Andrewkov]

Only on Slashdot do we discuss what is the most appropriate OS for a 13 year old girl. :)

Re:A lot of value...

[butterwise]

Whatever you say, Ballmer.

Re:A lot of value...

[cyber-dragon.net]

Ballmer? You are on /.? I didn't think you an Anonymous Coward though.

Re:Translated for the Lay

[jamstar7]

"Let's start with the end user. Your daughter saw a lot of value," said Ballmer.

Translation: We spent a lot of money packing it with bloat.

Translation: "Our Marketting Department spent 5 years changing the specs for the Engineering Department based on focus groups stuffed with hydrocephalic chimpanzees. We gotta get our money back before our stockholders show up with pitchforks & torches and lynch us."

"Users appreciate the value that we put into Vista," he said. But, as with earlier operating system releases, "there is always a tension between the value that end users see -- and frankly, that software developers see -- and the value that we can deliver to IT."

Translation: No matter how many versions we have, it's still one size fits all. The tension is generated because our developers don't lead normal lives and see things the way ordinary people do, which makes the end product obfuscated and confusing

Translation: "Our chimpanze focus groups are fickle as hell and constantly change their minds from minute to minute. This leads to developement team frustration, so we were forced to sedate them. That didn't work so well, so now we're trying lobotomies..."

"When we initially shipped, fewer device drivers were ready for Vista than I would have liked, but we constantly worked with the device vendors to get new drivers available and implemented through our Windows update service," he said.

Translation: We rushed it to market. If we had waited until it was really ready we would have seen our stock drop. The premature release was purely driven by profit motives rather than care for our customers.

Translation: "Our developers couldn't keep up with our changing specs. Don't blame us, blame the chimpanzes."

Re:Still

[Jonny_eh]

You have us on pins and needles, what was the file format she couldn't use?

mysterious

[CmdrGravy]

A mysterious, yet somehow incompatible, format you don't bother mentioning, mysterious. Very mysterious.

Re:A lot of value...

[Hatta]

I guess we now know why Inspector Gadget's gadgets were always malfunctioning. They were running vista. Good thing Penny runs linux.

Obligatory Neil Stephenson:

[Mongoose Disciple]

This reminds me of Stephenson's In The Beginning There Was The Command Line, which is a little dated now but still pretty funny. He describes the various OSes as different car dealerships, and Windows as an unreliable station wagon that for some reason 90% of the potential customers buy.

"With one exception, that is: Linux, which is right next door, and which is not a business at all. It's a bunch of RVs, yurts, tepees, and geodesic domes set up in a field and organized by consensus. The people who live there are making tanks. These are not old-fashioned, cast-iron Soviet tanks; these are more like the M1 tanks of the U.S. Army, made of space-age materials and jammed with sophisticated technology from one end to the other. But they are better than Army tanks. They've been modified in such a way that they never, ever break down, are light and maneuverable enough to use on ordinary streets, and use no more fuel than a subcompact car. These tanks are being cranked out, on the spot, at a terrific pace, and a vast number of them are lined up along the edge of the road with keys in the ignition. Anyone who wants can simply climb into one and drive it away for free."

And:

"The group giving away the free tanks only stays alive because it is staffed by volunteers, who are lined up at the edge of the street with bullhorns, trying to draw customers' attention to this incredible situation. A typical conversation goes something like this:

Hacker with bullhorn: "Save your money! Accept one of our free tanks! It is invulnerable, and can drive across rocks and swamps at ninety miles an hour while getting a hundred miles to the gallon!"

Prospective station wagon buyer: "I know what you say is true...but...er...I don't know how to maintain a tank!"

Bullhorn: "You don't know how to maintain a station wagon either!"

Buyer: "But this dealership has mechanics on staff. If something goes wrong with my station wagon, I can take a day off work, bring it here, and pay them to work on it while I sit in the waiting room for hours, listening to elevator music."

Bullhorn: "But if you accept one of our free tanks we will send volunteers to your house to fix it for free while you sleep!"

Buyer: "Stay away from my house, you freak!"

Bullhorn: "But..."

Buyer: "Can't you see that everyone is buying station wagons?""

Re:Obligatory Neil Stephenson:

[smackt4rd]

Yeah, except you have to drive the tank with a command line instead of a steering wheel/gas pedal/brake. :)

Re:Still

[eln]

You think that's bad? I installed Ubuntu, and not only did it fail to recognize my sound card, but it also stole my wallet, beat my wife, and impregnated my dog (and he's a boy!). Figuring that these were just the usual install problems, I decided to leave it running for a couple of days to see if things improved. Big mistake. During the night, Ubuntu planted marijuana all over my house and called the ATF. Luckily, it also blew up my car, the sound of which woke me up in time to escape. Now I'm living in a shack in Tierra del Fuego on the run from an international crime syndicate after Ubuntu stole my identity, ran away with my wife, and stole 300 kilos of Colombian nose candy from them.

I think I've had enough of Ubuntu. I'm going to try Gentoo next.

Re:Still

[Red Flayer]

In my experience, if you want your wife to stop bugging you about computer problems, buy her a Mac.

Well, my experience indicates that if you want your wife to stop bugging you, you should give her to Mac.

That is, if you know a guy named Mac, otherwise you may need to give her to Mike or John.

Re:Still

[JSG]

I had to look up ATF (I'm not from 'round there). BATF - Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms. Interesting combination. I don't know where to start taking the piss.

Interestingly enough, if you install Gentoo it will not only blow up your car but actually build you a new one.

From raw materials.

Make sure you specify USE="steeringwheel trunk windshield". You'll have to wait a while though but it will be worth it. It will rebuild itself every week or so and occasionally change colour for no accountable reason.

After three years you will discover that USE="-clutch" would have been a good idea when it suddenly becomes a manual shift without warning. You should have paid attention to the build logs when emerging --deep --newuse world. Oh, and it goes like stink most of the time. Ok so sometimes you have to fix it yourself by renting a foundry and full workshop and talking to Formula 1 mechanics but hey, this is a ~x86 car.

Re:+1 Funny

[graviplana]

"..According to our website stats Windows Vista market now share is -- wait for it -- 11%" Wow, Netcraft is sure accurate. I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Re:Still

[wcrowe]

Can't argue with that one. The wife liked my iMac so much, she took it in the divorce.

There are two fatal blunders a man can make:
1. Never start a land war in Asia
2. Never try to divorce a divorce lawyer

Re:Still

[PaulMorel]

You must be new to this game. Here let me help you with some other good ones: Yes, she looks good in that outfit. Yes, you like what she made for dinner... You kind of like it burnt anyway. Yes, she is still as attractive as the day you met. No, you don't mind Hugh Grant movies. Yes, you like her family. Of course that restaurant is fine with you. Yes you have time to get those chores done this weekend. If you repeat those things enough, you may just get away with 3 computers, 4 remote controls, a basement full of electronics, and an occasional roll in the hay.

Re:+1 Funny

[Greyfox]

That would be funny. I think it would go something like this...

Mrs. Ballmer: Stevie! Stevie! Your operating system SUCKS! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Steve: Mooooom! I'm doing a THING right now! Can't this wait? I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Mrs. Ballmer: No! It's too big and it's bloated and it SUCKS! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Steve: FINE! I'll send someone over to install it for you! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Mrs. Ballmer: Fine, honey! Will you be coming over tonight? I'm making spaghetti! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Steve: Ooh! I love your spaghetti! I'll be over around 7! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)
Mrs. Ballmer: Wonderful! We'll see you there! I'm going to F***ing KILL YOU! (Throws chair)(Exits)

Re:Still

[Scarletdown]

During the night, Ubuntu planted marijuana all over my house and called the ATF. Luckily, it also blew up my car, the sound of which woke me up in time to escape. At least Ubuntu did it the right way. Had it been Windows, it would have burned its lips on the exhaust pipe when it tried to blow up your car.

Re:A lot of value...

[Hucko]

Damn IT!! I want a reason to be anonymous too!

getting bigger

[telbij]

But machines are constantly getting bigger

Much like Ballmer himself.