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Court Strikes Down Age Verification For Adult Sites
How Appealing reports that a court has struck down age verification requirements for porn sites, as a First Amendment violation. Here is the ruling (PDF). While the average reader here has never been to such a site, porn has been a driving force in the economics and technology of the Net. The age verification requirements of U.S.C. Title 18, Section 2257 were yet another attempt to regulate to death what the government can't outright prohibit. The requirements intruded on the privacy and safety of performers and created headaches for sites like flickr and photobucket that host images. It is has long been thought that the requirements wouldn't hold up in court, but this is the first actual ruling.
are reluctant to give in to this on the first date. This guide will tell
you step by step, how to ensure that you get her into bed.
THE DATE
--------
Take her to a restaurant, somewhere nice but cheap. I'd advice someplace
close to home, because if all goes well, you will want to get her home as
quickly as possible, before she escapes, err.. changes her mind.
Dress for the occasion. Wear clothes that mask the real you, that being
wear a suit, or something. You want to get her to believe that you are a
gentlemen, as opposed to a sex crazed maniac, the latter being the real you.
Take her flowers. Something so cheap, but such a powerful weapon. If you
don't want to pay for some, steal them. Anyone can pull some flowers out
of their nextdoor neighbour's yard.
Preparation is the key to success, so before leaving, put the following in
your car (just in case): A strong nylon rope, a balaclava, a sharp
Wiltshire stay sharp filleting knife (preferably with a brown handle), a
copy of "Solider of Fortune" magazine, and a walkman. It would also be a
good idea to pack a large polythene bag as well, and maybe some bricks to
match it.
ON THE DATE
-----------
Whilst on the date, you must be polite. Try and trick the bitch into
believing that you are honest, kind, considerate of others, and a "new
age" male. Get her believing this and you are half way there to getting the
slag in the bag.
Talk about things of culture, music, art, theatre. Don't talk about things
like "The time you bit the head of your mother's budgie", "Or how you
murdered a million tibetan monks, but we're excused because you were a
freemason", or "How many men you killed in Vietnam". No, ladies don't like
that sort of talk, despite the fact it is far more interesting. Tell them
about how you are a fan of good music, and have a great record collection.
Make sure you gear everything you say around their interests. If you find
out that she is a fan of "The National Bulgarian Potplant Orchestra", tell
her you have got all their albums at home, and maybe one day she could come
over and have a look (at the records).
Use humour, be funny and make her laugh. While she is laughing, you can
order more drinks. The more intoxicated you get her, the better. Aim to
have her vomiting bilious fluid by the end of the night and success is
assured. Don't order beer, order expensive wines. Ladies like wine, and
if you pour drinks at a 4:1 ratio, you should only be tipsy by the nights
end.
As the night progresses, slowly but steadily, start telling her how much
you like her, and how much you have in common. Women love this sort of
crap. Act like you mean it, and she will be putty in your sweaty hands.
Don't go overboard though and start licking her feet, but pay her lots of
subtle compliments.
Towards the end of the night, tell how you would really like to see her
again. By now, she should be totally pissed. If not, tell her anyway. It
is now time to play the final card. Tell her that she is too pissed to
drive, and so you'll take her home.
Stop off at your house, and invite her inside for a coffee. Hopefully, she
will accept, if not then it's time to get mean. Remember, fear and threats
the greatest aphrodisiac. If she refuses, try and convince her with words.
If words fail, lock the doors. Central locking is beaut for this. She will
probably get scared and start screaming now. If not now, then she probably
will when you begin to rape her. Take the nylon rope and tie her neck to the
headrest. Do it tightly in a slipknot, so that the more she moves, the more
she'll choke. Rip off her dress, and taking the knife in one hand hold it
This is good news for freedom of expression, and for the internet in general, because most of it consists of porn.
In other porn news, bestiality-porn is about to be made illegal in my country, which saddens me because I like goats.
Azural - instrumentals
lol goatse
"You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows." - Bob Dylan
Those are some interesting points you have there. Why don't you go read the ruling and come back and make some points that have even a little bit to do with it. I mean come on, this isn't about verifying that seventeen year olds are not browsing your porn site. It's about keeping track of the age and identity of the young gal who is being double penetrated and face fucked whose picture you are putting on your website. Seriously. How hard is it to read a pdf?
Oh dear. We have ourselves a religious nut here.
I know it's tempting to try and force the ideals of your religion on anyone who'll listen (and if Christian, even the people who wont) but you need to be aware that it is the individual's decision what ideals they want to follow, provided they walk within the bounds of the law. If a person chooses to watch this type of material, that's their call. Not yours. Not your holy books. And might I add, you religious folks need to stop trying to get the ideals of your holy book codified as law - ironic that they preach that "god gave us free will to make our own choices" and then object when someone exercises that free will.
Woah, going way off topic here.
For a site about things like basic rights, Slashdot users sure do like to censor "dissent".
I wonder if the judges would've ruled differently if they had seen this compelling video. This law could have protected many people of questionable age from exploitation in the prono industry.
Ah nice... can everyone now PLEASE remove those anoying "age-check" drop-downs again? It's stupidly obvious that everyone just selects something between 1901 and 1980 with one swoop from the mouse-wheel.
my god she is ugly.