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Microsoft Giving Away Vista Ultimate, With a Catch

Opinari writes "In case you haven't heard, Microsoft is giving away copies of Windows Vista Ultimate (32-bit or 64-bit DVD), Microsoft Office Ultimate 2007, Microsoft Money Plus Premium, Microsoft Student with Encarta Premium 2008, or Microsoft Streets and Trips 2008 — you can choose any one. The caveat is that you have to let them monitor your use of the program."

33 of 495 comments (clear)

  1. Free... by crazyjeremy · · Score: 5, Funny

    Free as in Linux? No, free as in Microsoft!

    1. Re:Free... by squidinkcalligraphy · · Score: 5, Funny

      Free as in beer? No, free as in an NSA wiretap!

      --
      "I think it would be a good idea" Gandhi, on Western Civilisation
    2. Re:Free... by davester666 · · Score: 5, Funny

      The catch...you have to use Vista..

      --
      Sleep your way to a whiter smile...date a dentist!
    3. Re:Free... by SL+Baur · · Score: 4, Funny
      Free as in Microsoft ...

      What are the system requirements?
      The only requirements are that your home PC is running the Microsoft Windows Vista or Windows XP operating system, and that you have an Internet connection. That's it! I guess I don't qualify :( and I so wanted to dance in the streets burning Linux and Mac OS X cds celebrating my new freedom while I was installing a real OS on my MacBook Pro ...
    4. Re:Free... by Goldberg's+Pants · · Score: 5, Funny

      You sank my battleship.

    5. Re:Free... by name*censored* · · Score: 3, Funny
      without someone holding a gun to their head ;)

      Are you taking volunteers? If so, sign me up!
      --
      Commodore64_love: I don't comprehend people who're so frightened of death that they'll bankrupt themselves to stay alive
    6. Re:Free... by nem75 · · Score: 4, Funny

      The catch...you have to use Vista..
      Nah. You could just not use it and let them monitor that.
    7. Re:Free... by martin-boundary · · Score: 1, Funny

      The NSA have got "Wire" on tap? Man, those microbreweries are popping up everywhere!

    8. Re:Free... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      You say wiretap
      I say Spinal Tap
      The Sex Farm Woman
      With the really Big Bottom
      Just couldn't put Stonehenge back.

    9. Re:Free... by sm62704 · · Score: 2, Funny

      This is starting to look like a horror movie

      Starting? You haven't been using Microsoft products very long, have you?

      -mcgrew

      --
      mcgrew's razor: Never attribute to stupidity that which can be explained by greedy self-interest
    10. Re:Free... by Yewbert · · Score: 5, Funny

      I was thinking,.... hmmm, dedicated box to run uTorrent sharing Linux distros,... Sure, let 'em watch.

    11. Re:Free... by MrJack5304 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Illusions hitmark, illusions. Tricks are what whores do for money.

    12. Re:Free... by encoderer · · Score: 4, Funny

      You mean it will "suck fewer resources," right?

      Cause let's be real.. it's Vista.. it certainly won't suck less...

  2. Which is the catch? by amccaf1 · · Score: 5, Funny

    The caveat is that you have to let them monitor your use of the program.
    Wait, which is the catch: the fact that they will monitor your use, or the implication that you'll be using it?
    --
    "Flag on the moon. How did it get there?"
    1. Re:Which is the catch? by pushf+popf · · Score: 5, Funny

      You guys are obviously morons. My copy of Vista works perfectly.

      I picked up a brand new really fast Toshiba with a bunch of RAM, brought it home and it ran like crap, kept crashing and accused me of stealing something or other.

      I did a little Googling and learned that the problem was bad drivers. You need to install this set of drivers named "Fedora". I popped in the "Fedora" disk, rebooted, answered a couple of questions (it must be really intelligent, since it didn't even want my Activation Key again), and everything worked great!

      Tomorrow, I'm going to call Toshiba and find out why they didn't just ship this "Fedora" update automatically.

  3. Webcam + Wood Maul by explosivejared · · Score: 5, Funny

    The caveat is that you have to let them monitor your use of the program.

    This is how I would go about this. I would get a free copy of vista. Then, I would set web cam up outside on the driveway. I would grab a wood maul and just go to town on the disc, and do my best to savor the thought of MS technicians staring on in horror.

    --
    I got a catholic block.
    1. Re:Webcam + Wood Maul by Darby · · Score: 5, Funny

      I would grab a wood maul and just go to town on the disc, and do my best to savor the thought of MS technicians staring on in horror.

      You misspelled "longing".

  4. Reminds me of an offer I got in jail by unassimilatible · · Score: 5, Funny

    "All the sex you want! But you're not going to like the catch."

    --
    Slashdot "libertarians": Small government for me, big government for those I disagree with. -1, I disagree with you
  5. Honeypot by fractalVisionz · · Score: 5, Funny

    I should set up a honeypot with their products. Hopefully when they are watching, they will get a virus or infected by a bot net.

  6. Re:Not accurate. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    "They want to monitor whatever you are currently using today, XP or Vista..."

    Which is another catch. They will only give you a "free" version if you are already a Microsoft customer. They want to install monitoring software on your box to upload to their server. So Linux and Mac users looking to score are SOL.

  7. 2girls1cup by AikonMGB · · Score: 3, Funny

    I would setup a dedicated box with XP on it that would just sit their with their spy software installed and 2girls1cup running on replay. Stuff it in the basement and forget about it for three months :D

    Aikon-

  8. They'd be pretty happy, I'd think. by KingSkippus · · Score: 5, Funny

    They're still going to count it as another person "using" Vista. I'm guessing they'd be pretty happy. I can see the marketing spin now. "Even a skeptic like Jared found that the Vista user experience was extremely satisfying."

  9. Re:Hide your own habits... use a VM! by Junta · · Score: 5, Funny
    Cause for concern:

    Will I be able to see what data I'm sharing with you?

    Unfortunately, you will not be able to look at your specific data. We designed the Windows Feedback Program software specifically to avoid any interference with your work or how your computer functions. To do that, the data you are sharing is stored in a binary format (zeros and ones) rather than in text format. Storing the data in binary format makes it very small and easy to share with us, but difficult for you to translate and interpret. Damn, stored in zeros and ones, nothing I can do, it's binary. There's no way they could let me know how to understand it. If only it were just zeros, or ones, or maybe some twos...
    --
    XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
  10. My thought process was as such... by definate · · Score: 4, Funny

    Something FREE! That's good!

    Vista Ultimate? That's bad!

    Monitoring? That's bad!

    Can I downgrade it to Windows XP Pro and get a free Windows XP Pro license that's legit? That'd be good! ...

    Just seems you can't even give Vista away.

    --
    This is my footer. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
    1. Re:My thought process was as such... by nuggetman · · Score: 3, Funny

      Take this OS, but beware, it contains monitoring software.
      That's bad.
      But it comes with a free legitimate license!
      That's good!
      The legitimate license also contains monitoring software.
      That's bad.
      But you get your choice of XP or Vista!
      That's good!
      There are no more copies of XP, only Vista. .....That's bad.
      Can I go now?

      --
      ...and that's all there is to it.
  11. Geez... Such Cynical People by Comatose51 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I can't believe all the cynical responses from Slashdot readers. Why would you doubt the sincerity and generosity of the company found by the man who will donate $100 to an orphanage each time I forward his email to someone?

    --
    EvilCON - Made Famous by /.
  12. The Catch by popo · · Score: 3, Funny


    "The caveat is that you have to let them monitor your use of the program"

    So they'll monitor my activities when I sell it on eBay?

    --
    ------ The best brain training is now totally free : )
  13. Tomorrow's headline... by aeSentinel · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...Satan is giving away free money. The caveat is that you have to give him your soul.

  14. Thanks Microsoft by MrCopilot · · Score: 2, Funny
    Thanks for the laugh, Oh man that FAQ is a riot. Highlights:

    What am I agreeing to do?
    To participate, you will need to agree to allow Microsoft to gather and record information about the use of your home computer on an ongoing basis. By agreeing to voluntarily participate in the Windows Feedback Program, you agree that:

    * You will abide by all terms stated and referred to in the Terms of Use and Notices ("Agreement"), including granting Microsoft a license to use your data and feedback.
    * You will install software provided to you by Microsoft to facilitate and allow data to be recorded, transmitted, and used by Microsoft.
    * You will be invited to participate in occasional online surveys.

    Then this one.

    Will I be able to see what data I'm sharing with you?
    Unfortunately, you will not be able to look at your specific data. We designed the Windows Feedback Program software specifically to avoid any interference with your work or how your computer functions. To do that, the data you are sharing is stored in a binary format (zeros and ones) rather than in text format. Storing the data in binary format makes it very small and easy to share with us, but difficult for you to translate and interpret.

    Stop it, I'm gonnan pee. This one

    Does my shared data have a unique identifier? Yes, we have a unique identifier for your data. This allows us to tell between one customer having an error 100 times and 100 customers having the same error once. Being able to make that distinction is very valuable in prioritizing how we improve our products.

    Ooh, almost forgot my favorite

    Can I install the WFP software on more than one Windows computer?
    Yes, the software can be installed on multiple computers and registered using the same e-mail you provided.

    This whole thing just feels .....right, you know. I'll do it!

    HaHahaHAHaHAhaaHAhaHAahaa!

    --
    OSGGFG - Open Source Gamers Guide to Free Games
  15. Be Helpful by Propaganda13 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'd use it to read http://annoyances.org/. I'd go around editing the registry and fixing common annoyances. Hopefully, Microsoft would realize what they need to fix.

  16. Fine, let them monitor... by vistic · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'll freak MS out by doing nothing with ULTIMATE Office except try to open OpenOffice documents all day long.

  17. Don't Give a Flyin' by stewbacca · · Score: 3, Funny

    As someone who cares not one bit about my "privacy", I'd love to see more of these types of deals. The only thing that makes me wary when dealing with "privacy" is I prefer not to be spammed for the rest of my life. I could, however, give a flyin' f*&k if anyone is monitoring what I do on my computer. If you are monitoring me, be prepared to be bored to tears.

  18. *sees kids, addresses them* by BitterAndDrunk · · Score: 2, Funny

    Or cocaine!

    --
    You better watch out, there may be dogs about . . .