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How to Recognize a Good Programmer

KDan writes to share an article he has written about what some of the key factors in recognizing a good programmer. "It's not as easy as it sounds. CV experience is only of limited use here, because great programmers don't always have the 'official' experience to demonstrate that they're great. In fact, a lot of that CV experience can be misleading. Yet there are a number of subtle cues that you can get, even from the CV, to figure out whether someone's a great programmer."

37 of 529 comments (clear)

  1. Hope this makes it. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    #include <stdio.h>
    int main(void)
    {
    /* duh, have to get the vars before... */
    if (firstName == "Theo" && LastName == "de Raadt")
    {
    printf("Excellent programmer\n");
    }
    else
    {
    printf("Hmmm... better look further.\n");
    }
    printf ("f1r57 pr0st!\n");
    return 0;
    }
    1. Re:Hope this makes it. by Reverend528 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Sorry, it doesn't compile. I'm going to have to mod you down for that.

    2. Re:Hope this makes it. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      By reverse engineering this article, I've found out "How to be recognized as a good programmer."

    3. Re:Hope this makes it. by Glonoinha · · Score: 4, Funny

      Real programmers don't write catch blocks.

      In the words of my master,
      Do or do not.
      There is no try.

      --
      Glonoinha the MebiByte Slayer
  2. it's easier than you think: by yagu · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's easier than you think:

    1. Find a good programmer and learn his (or her) name.
    2. Get to know him (or her).
    3. Take him (or her) out to coffee a few times.
    4. Engage in as many social activities with this good programmer as possible.

    After sufficient interactions like these with a good programmer you really should be able to recognize him (or her).

    (Appropriate apologies to Steve Martin for shameless borrowing of his "How to get a million dollars, and not pay taxes" routine.

    1. Re:it's easier than you think: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      PROTIP: Unpronounceable last names and comically bad hair are also good signs - but not positive proof.

      So you'd advise outsourcing to India or Eastern Europe?
    2. Re:it's easier than you think: by computational+super · · Score: 4, Funny

      What really sets you apart from others, though, is your humility.

      --
      Proud neuron in the Slashdot hivemind since 2002.
    3. Re:it's easier than you think: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I'm a "all I do is code" type and I've written some truely amazing code which works quickly, efficiently and is used on hundreds of different high traffic websites.
      I have yet to find someone who can understand what it does and how it does it. Its voodoo to everyone.
      I also have x-ray vision, can fly, can leap tall buildings in a single bound, speak 17 languages with different dialects of each, and can kill you 30 different ways with my pinky.

      I'm a level 12 paladin with +4 hitting power.
      I also have the magic spells of healing and fireball.

      And I have the force.
    4. Re:it's easier than you think: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I agree, "as dollar weakens" is a pretty comical last name. Those crazy North Americans!

    5. Re:it's easier than you think: by Chysn · · Score: 4, Funny

      > I double-dog dare you to post these magical 20 lines here

              I'm gonna slightly break protocol here and go right to the dreaded triple-dog dare.

      --
      --I'm so big, my sig has its own sig.
      -- See?
  3. CV experience? by HTH+NE1 · · Score: 4, Funny

    CV experience is only of limited use here, because great programmers don't always have the 'official' experience to demonstrate that they're great. In fact, a lot of that CV experience can be misleading. Yet there are a number of subtle cues that you can get, even from the CV, to figure out whether someone's a great programmer.
    You mean the hours I put in playing CastleVania isn't necessarily a reliable metric to determine how great a programmer I am?
    --
    Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?
    1. Re:CV experience? by RailGunner · · Score: 2, Funny

      No, only Simon's Quest counts - since 80% of the clues in that game are misleading or outright false, only Simon's Quest prepares you to deal with management-speak that is 80% misleading or outright falsehoods.
       

  4. Re:Sweet! by MikeDirnt69 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hope your next boss doesn't know it, so he can't manipulate your paycheck!

    --
    Am I eval()? - http://www.monst3r.com.br
  5. How to recognize a good sysadmin by alta · · Score: 5, Funny

    They obviously can't find a good sysadmin that can project future load on their servers and scale accordingly ;)

    Or maybe they can, and the sysadmin can just blame the evil bean counters.

    --
    Do not meddle in the affairs of sysadmins, for they are subtle, and quick to anger.
  6. Re:BigInt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    How can I find programmers who don't squander their days reading Slashdot.

  7. Re:WTF is a CV? by VAXcat · · Score: 2, Funny

    Jeez! Don't they teach you kids Latin anymore?

    --
    There is no God, and Dirac is his prophet.
  8. One step to knowing if they are great by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Ask them if they are a Slashdotter. If they say yes... move on and ask the next guy.

  9. Ask him... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Ask him if he's a good programmer in klingon

  10. Easy. I see a damn good programmer when ... by 140Mandak262Jamuna · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... I am brushing my teeth in the morning in the mirror, grinning back at me, saying what a great programmer I am. :-)

    --
    sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
    1. Re:Easy. I see a damn good programmer when ... by Jeremi · · Score: 3, Funny
      I am brushing my teeth in the morning in the mirror, grinning back at me, saying what a great programmer I am. :-)


      If nothing else, being able to grin, talk, and brush your teeth all at the same time is indeed a rare talent :^)

      --


      I don't care if it's 90,000 hectares. That lake was not my doing.
  11. Lots of ways by hey! · · Score: 4, Funny

    First, there is razor sharp intellect and subtle, erudite wit. There's the way he has of getting right to the heart of matters, his effortlessly quick and authoritative opinions on an astonishing array of subjects. Of course it is conceivable that some might miss his unconventional but undeniable good looks, although that might stretch the bounds of credibility.

    But in a pinch you can go with the way that he often goes about wearing your pants or the fact that he stares back at you from the mirror every morning. That's a dead giveaway.

    Of course if that fellow's unavailable, most people end up settling for somebody who, while utterly lacking his extraordinary qualities, nonetheless agree with as many of his opinions has he has cared to express.

    --
    Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
  12. Re:BigInt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    How can I find programmers who don't squander their days reading Slashdot.

    Easy...If they can finish any of these.. don't hire them...

    a) I for one welcome our new programming _________

    b) In Soviet Russia the programmers ____ ___

    c)
    1. Hire programmer
    2. ?????
    3. ______

    or make a comment about Macs/PS3/Windows and if you get modded/spelling or grammar corrected.. the same applies.

  13. fear by psbrogna · · Score: 2, Funny

    I was going to read the article but I didn't because I'm too afraid that there's going to be pictures of what good programmers look like. Let's face it, we're not the chic-est demographic on the planet.

  14. They forgot the most important one by mrhifibanjostrings · · Score: 2, Funny

    The list seems to be lacking one of the more important ways of identifying a good programmer -- the uncanny ability to quote from the entire works of Monty Python.

  15. Re:Two things by phasm42 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Thats why once, in .NET, I coded some tool, it took let say 50000 lines of code, then learned about some obscure feature that could have reduced it to 500. Yes, 500.
    Arrays?

    I kid, I kid!
    --
    "No one likes working in a hamster wheel, and your shop smells of cedar shavings from here." - TaleSpinner
  16. See previous article by tmcmahon · · Score: 5, Funny

    He can re-program a Tram system with a remote control.

  17. He? She? by AeroIllini · · Score: 5, Funny

    If your potential programmer didn't do any programming before university, and all his experience starts when she got her first job, she's probably not a good programmer. Apparently, a lot happened between university and that first job.
    --
    For security, the MD5 hash of this message and sig is 09f911029d74e35bd84156c5635688c0.
  18. Re:They're out there, but scarce.... by codepunk · · Score: 3, Funny

    Perhaps because we spend our entire life typing shit like this...

    SomeStupidAssLongClassName clsSomeStupidAssLongClassName = new SomeStupidAssLongClassName();

    --


    Got Code?
  19. This is why... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
    ...I still submit my resumes on punch cards.

    #include <stdio.h> And I'm always dismayed by programmers that can never spell "studio" properly...
  20. Re:They're out there, but scarce.... by Richard+Steiner · · Score: 2, Funny

    If you're gonna use spelling as a criteria, be sure to keep in mind that there are a several variants of English (as well as just about every other natural language in existence), and while you might not consider "favour" to be a (the?) correct spelling of "favor", the programmer you're evaluating might, and this would not detract from the "attention to detail" argument.

    Speaking as someone who works in an international company and regularly collaborates with technical folks in the UK and Australia, I strongly agree. Just because they have different spelling standards doesn't make them incorrect. Just wrong. :-)

    Sorry, I mean different. :-) :-)

    --
    Mainframe/UNIX Bit Twiddler and long time Windows/Linux Hobbyist.
    The Theorem Theorem: If If, Then Then.
  21. Re:BigInt by jimbojw · · Score: 3, Funny

    I cant understand any of those, you insensitive clod!

  22. Re:BigInt by maxwell+demon · · Score: 5, Funny

    a) I for one welcome our new programming challenges

    b) In Soviet Russia the programmers know math

    c)
    1. Hire programmer
    2. ?????
    3. Pay salary!

    OK, did I pass the test? :-)

    --
    The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
  23. Re:Two things by Red+Flayer · · Score: 3, Funny

    Knowing 10 technologies equaly well means that you don't know either of them at their peek.
    At first I was going to make some snide comment about grammar, since 'either of them' should refer to ten technologies.

    Then I re-read it... you wrote 10, not ten.

    Nice.
    --
    "Trolls they were, but filled with the evil will of their master: a fell race..." -- J.R.R. Tolkien on Olog-hai
  24. not what I wanted to learn by esj+at+harvee · · Score: 2, Funny

    crap, crap, crap. I hit every one of those points. Self driven learning, always exploring new forms of technology and then applying it to the current business, etc. etc. Maybe if I hadn't been so good, my hands would still work and I wouldn't be living with constant pain up to my elbows. What's ironic is I left my father's rigging business (machinery moving) because I saw so many people around me losing fingers, damaging their limbs and back etc.. and I wanted to go do something where I wouldn't be injured on the job. Since I had been programming in high school, I thought hey, this is not a bad career. You work indoors, you're not covered in grease, you don't breathe toxic chemicals and you aren't going to get injured by heavy machinery falling on you.

    Ha.

  25. No. by EnsilZah · · Score: 2, Funny

    You're a clever one but I'm afraid your sig blew your meticulously constructed cover.

  26. Re:OMG you are kidding right? by MPAB · · Score: 2, Funny

    None of them could swing a tune on any instrument save a keyboard.
    Lifeforms... you tiny little lifeforms... you precious little lifeforms... where-are-you?
  27. Re:Useless article by I8TheWorm · · Score: 2, Funny

    The Paul Graham quote did fail to mention some of the genius Harvard-MBA-type decisions like with drkoop.com, which had no revenue stream. They really did fit the 1) make a website, 2) ???, 3) profit! model. We bought some of their servers for ten cents on the dollar when I was still in Austin.

    --
    Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.