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Uwe Boll Returns To Small-Time Terrible Films
SatanicPuppy writes "According to Reuters Uwe Boll, the German director the critics love to hate, will return to low-budget filmmaking now that his latest and biggest production, the $70 million fantasy epic 'In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale,' bombed at the North American box office. The tax shelter loopholes that funded the previous films have been banned in Germany, making further large budget films unlikely."
In the Name of the King bombed? Even when they appended "A Dungeon Siege tale" to the end of the name? I figured referencing an obscure game that the average moviegoer never heard of would be a surefire marketing strategy.
You just know that the dialog in that one is going to be great. MST3K material for sure.
The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination
- Douglas Adams
praise the lord
blessed be legislators of german tax shelters
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
It's about time Uwe Boll went back to the bush league. Perhaps his swan song as a director could be a low-budget film production of Springtime for Hitler.
if twas in my powers, your prayers would be answered with a powerful smiting
i shall pray with thee:
oh Lord, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, please to be smiting Jack Thompson, who in your eyes has done great devilishness, and makes a mockery of your good work
amen
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
Whose films will I mercilessly mock now??? I guess there's always the faint hope that they'll greenlight Ghost Rider 2...
"Life's short and hard, like a body building elf." -- The Bloodhound Gang
So what if he's been able to bankroll his movies up until now? Who are the crackpots that keep licensing their games to him to make into movies?!? Why on Earth, if you've made a successful video game, would you ever think to license the material to this guy?!? IMDB shows me two more Bloodraynes, Postal, another Alone in the Dark, and Far Cry. Why???
Q: What's the difference between a big-budget Uwe Boll film and a low-budget Uwe Boll film?
A: The budget.
To make a big-budget re-remake of "The Producers" :-)
Taxes stopped Uwe Boll. Taxes stopped Al Capone. Is there anything taxes can't do? Actually, is there anything that can do my taxes?
To be fair, Postal looks rather funny and certainly no worse than a number of recent low-brow comedy/parody movies made here in the U.S.
...and that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Looking at the comment count on this story, even a slashdot story about him isn't even getting viewers!
Do not meddle in the affairs of sysadmins, for they are subtle, and quick to anger.
Now how will i know which movie based on a game to avoid?
I mean it's good in the sense that he won't be butchering the story lines we love so much with horrible scripts and inane dialog, and game-movies will get better box office returns which will only help to make better funding available for more game-movies, and possibly make games seem more like art than time wasters (which most definitely are)to the average public, but.. um, on the downside... hmm, i guess there is no downside to Ewe not making game movies.
Maybe he can start making romantic comedies so my wife will avoid those too? I can only hope.
The whole Uwe Boll saga is a sad illustration of the Law of Unintended Effects. The German lawmakers, aware that the high German taxes were hampering the media industry, wanted to give a break to some noisy lobbyist. Cut taxes? Naah, that'd be against the prevalent Big All-Encompassing State mindset.
So instead, lawmakers concocted a bug-ridden, horribly deficient tax shelter law with untested, badly designed rules -- the legal equivalent of Windows ME.
When accountants started to exploit the loopholes, it took said lawmakers years to identify and plug the hole.
Meanwhile, huge amounts of money were spent on crappy movies that will act as a deterrent for anyone trying to make a *good* SF or fantasy flick. "Hey, mister Studio Exec, I want to adapt this great fantasy story. Wanna produce it?" "Oh no, look, this Name of the King flick failed, so clearly, fantasy does not sell. Let's make an eight remake of Freaky Friday instead."
Had these lawmakers had a clue, they'd have done the proper thing and cut taxes. The German investors would have bought beemers and luxury schnaps, providing jobs to the German economy instead of creating temporary employment to foreign film crews who now have these embarassing Boll stains on their resume.
Fantasy: http://ferrisfantasy.blogspot.com/
...that I haven't even heard of 'In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale'? It sounds kind of like a supplement for a d20 system book or something.
how about making a game where you are Uwe Boll and you have to make terrible movies about games.
It could be a MMORPG (since they are all the hype now) where you get a quest, kill a few hundred of scripts, find a game, steal the funding from some old lady orc and then you join all the ingredients in a smithy thing to create the movie. The worst the movie the more XP you get.
Could be UwerQuest or something.
Then I can already picture Uwe making a movie out of this game with some fantastic title like The Creation of a Dynasty: a UwerQuest.
Bah, better get back to working.
alias possession='chmod 666 satan && ls
Did they even advertise this movie?
I thought it was out in the summer on DVD.
I am so confused...