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Sperm Made From Female Bone Marrow, Men Obsolete?

Posted by ScuttleMonkey on from the what-some-women-have-been-saying-for-years dept.

Shaitan Apistos writes "British scientists have discovered a way to turn female bone marrow into sperm, allowing women to reproduce without the need of male companionship. All children born of this method would be female, due the lack Y chromosomes, and there is high chance of birth defects. Eggs also can be created from male bone marrow, but men looking to reproduce would still need to find a surrogate mother to handle the gestation period. I'd like to take a moment to welcome our new amazonian overlords and remind them that men are still very good at mowing lawns and fixing cars."

37 of 459 comments (clear)

  1. dont forget by User+956 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'd like to take a moment to welcome our new amazonian overlords and remind them that men are still very good at mowing lawns and fixing cars.

    Also, SNOO SNOO!

    --
    The theory of relativity doesn't work right in Arkansas.
    1. Re:dont forget by cayenne8 · · Score: 4, Funny
      "I'd like to take a moment to welcome our new amazonian overlords and remind them that men are still very good at mowing lawns and fixing cars. "

      That and you can't take a vibrator home to meet your parents....

      --
      Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
    2. Re:dont forget by CastrTroy · · Score: 4, Funny

      Or, if this catches on, your parent.

      --

      Anthropic principle: We see the universe the way it is because if it were different we would not be here to see it.
  2. We discussed males and females, so.... by DanMelks · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...so where do transsexuals fit in here?

    1. Re:We discussed males and females, so.... by tacocat · · Score: 5, Funny

      I guess after being told to "Go Fuck Yourself" for so many years, these scientists finally found a way to do it.

      There will be some interesting debates raging about this one for a long time. I'm of the opinion that on the whole, we are better off with the process of gene mixing than practicing self-eugenics.

  3. In other news... by Tsar · · Score: 4, Funny

    British scientists have discovered a way to move around by walking, making wheeled transportation obsolete. All trips made with this method would be short or very slow due the lack of speed, and there is high chance of being late. I'd like to take a moment to welcome our new ambling overlords and remind them that airplanes are still pretty handy for the really long trips.

  4. damn. by theheadlessrabbit · · Score: 5, Funny

    as soon as scientists develop a machine that automatically opens pickle jars, men are fscked.

    I don't want to be obsolete.
    now I know how Windows feels. :(

    --
    -I only code in BASIC.-
  5. More seriously... by DrYak · · Score: 5, Funny

    This could be genuine good news for :
    - Homosexual couples (2 lesbians, or 2 gay men + 1 surrogate mother)
    - Couples where 1 is trans gender (and lack the correct type of gonads)
    One day such technology would enable both parents in such couples to be the biological parents.

    Now back to humour :
    Yes, we *DO* welcome our new Amazon overlords.
    Specially since, if as a consequence of this the percentage of women increases in the general population, this new girls:boys ratio (men are rare) when added to eons-old instinct (sex drive) will finally increases the chances for the average /. to get laid.

    --
    "Sufficiently advanced satire is indistinguishable from reality." - [Tips: 1DrYakQDKCQ6y52z6QbnkxHXAocMZJE61o ]
    1. Re:More seriously... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Have you _SEEN_ the average /.er? It's more likely that that's the reason why women would seek this.

    2. Re:More seriously... by turgid · · Score: 2, Funny

      Have you smelled the average /.er? Nope, regular guys will just get more.

      --
      Stick Men
  6. Fixed it by eebra82 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Isn't Will Smith starring in some movie with tagline "the last man on earth"? Did the women kill the rest of them?

    --
    Full Tilt
    1. Re:Fixed it by timmarhy · · Score: 3, Funny

      no the women just nagged them till all they could do is hide in the dark and bite anything that comes near them.

      --
      If you mod me down, I will become more powerful than you can imagine....
  7. Women of the world, I entreat thee! by Junior+J.+Junior+III · · Score: 5, Funny

    Before you go throwing out the male gender, stop for a moment and consider this:

    Sperm extracted from my bone is a lot less painful to obtain than from your bones. Think about it!

    --
    You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
    1. Re:Women of the world, I entreat thee! by swarsron · · Score: 5, Funny

      great, now they're going to rip our bones out to make sperm. Way to go, traitor!

    2. Re:Women of the world, I entreat thee! by dfghjk · · Score: 3, Funny

      Except that, considering your name is "Junior J Junior III", that hardly sounds appealing.

      Knowing the use of your sperm would condemn future generations of males to "juniordom" is tantamount to child abuse.

  8. Re:Too bad.... by Znork · · Score: 5, Funny

    If men had been the ones carrying the babies I'd betcha good money that we'd have had artificial wombs perfected in the 1930's.

  9. Feminists, rejoice! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    This has got to be a feminist's wet dream. Women of Mt. Holyoke university (and the like), rejoice!

  10. Silly Scientists... This aint nothing new... by Jackie_Chan_Fan · · Score: 3, Funny

    Hell, I be making sperm every time i bone a female.

  11. Flat Pack Furniture by turgid · · Score: 4, Funny

    This won't be allowed to happen. IKEA will go out of business.

    --
    Stick Men
  12. Yes by eclectro · · Score: 4, Funny

    But my sperm is Organic(TM). No telling what you're gonna get with the fake stuff.

    --
    Take the cheese to sickbay, the doctor should see it as soon as possible - B'Elanna Torres, "Learning Curve"
    1. Re:Yes by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Strange, mine is Orgasmic(tm).

  13. Re:Too bad.... by TapeCutter · · Score: 2, Funny

    Who says we didn't ;)

    --
    And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? - Pink Floyd.
  14. Old news - I'm a Slashdotter by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 4, Funny

    I've been obsolete from a reproductive point of view for some time now.

    --
    Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
  15. Re:Too bad.... by Nullav · · Score: 4, Funny

    That, or babies would be a lot...thinner. (Damn, just thinking about it hurts.)

    --
    I just read Slashdot for the articles.
  16. Re:Of course men not obsolete just yet by umghhh · · Score: 2, Funny

    who is going to make vibrators if man is going extinct?

  17. You do that, I will specialize in SnooSnoo by SmallFurryCreature · · Score: 2, Funny

    Lets face it, robotic mowers exist. Garbage chutes exist. But dildo's have been around for millenia and they never replaced us yet.

    Mind you, it is murder on the hips but a man got to do, what a man got to do. I will bravely sacrifice myself so that the rest of slashdot can live a pure life! Yes I am that noble.

    --

    MMO Quests are like orgasms:

    You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.

  18. Re:Like women would really get themselves pregnant by turgid · · Score: 2, Funny

    And you, Mr Stork, will be out of business!

    --
    Stick Men
  19. I wouldn't say obsolete. by EddyPearson · · Score: 2, Funny

    I wouldn't say obsolete, just a lot cheaper.

    --
    You feel sleepy. Close your eyes. The opinions stated above are yours. You cannot imagine why you ever felt otherwise.
  20. Downgraded? by dtml-try+MyNick · · Score: 4, Funny

    So men are now downgraded to just a lustobject?

    Ofcourse that's very sad and tragic. But I can live with it.

    --
    Life starts at the end of your comfort zone.
  21. Re:Of course men not obsolete just yet by SCHecklerX · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yeah, but women already have functional 'robotic companions'. That's a little more difficult a problem to solve for men.

  22. This will be a challenge for female legislation by Tanuki64 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I mean, what is reproduction without men good for, when there is no way to make a man pay for the children?

  23. Wow by g0bshiTe · · Score: 3, Funny

    Talk about inbreeding.

    --
    I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
  24. yea, right. by jgarra23 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Somehow a civilization of bone-marrow specialist dykes does not seem all that likely...

  25. All females with birth defects? by whoda · · Score: 2, Funny

    Sounds like Al Qaeda will have a large supply of remote detonated 'suicide' bombers.

  26. wow.... by c6gunner · · Score: 2, Funny

    Gives a whole new meaning to "getting boned"!

  27. Re:Of course men not obsolete just yet by Rabbit+Time! · · Score: 3, Funny

    The thing about gay men having a bigger cock is true though. As a woman, that would make me very sad. You guys are already have an average hotness value much above straight men, do you have to take the big cocks away from us too? Have you no decency? :-D
  28. Re:Of course men not obsolete just yet by value_added · · Score: 4, Funny
    The simple fact is ...

    You're absolutely right. I'm wrong on all counts.

    • Men are not attracted to "big boobs and ass" to the exclusion of all else because those qualities are universally associated with the ability to carry on the gene line by bearing and raising children, but because they've watched too much porn.
    • Women are not attracted to "strong and handsome" (especially at ovulation time), or alternatively, rich and powerful, because those qualities are indicative of someone who can provide and protect, but because they read about it in a magazine.
    • The object of dating is to make more friends.
    • Women never ever have relations with a man solely because they want to get pregnant. This is particularly true for girls in their teens, and women in their forties.
    • Both a mother and father are absolutely required to raise a normal, healthy child. It is untrue to suggest that it's in any way acceptable acceptable to be a single parent. Recent medical advances don't disprove this, and are mere curiousities that have no effect on the actions or mores of society as a whole. Who cares what gays and lesbians think. It's a fact they're all going to hell.
    • Everyone wants security but it's a lie to say that women absolutely need it and will demand it first among all things. Men and women are not animals, and any similarity to the behaviour of animals on the NatGeo channel is a mere coincidence.
    • It's a myth that men will seek a great number of sex partners. See above. What men really want is long-term companionship.
    • Woman really prefer dogs to cats.
    • Marriage is not a legal contract that involves bargaining and an exchange of money and property. Marriage is a union of love, and the historical nature of it should be dismissed as an unfortunate error. The reason why the rich continue to insist that their lawyers handle it is simply because their lawyers need the work. The main cause of arguments and divorce is never money
    • It's a myth that a woman's sex drive decreases during pregnancy. It does not disappear for an extended time after childbirth. In fact, the woman regards the man in the same manner as when they were dating, and the man regards the woman's changed attitudes and weight gain as enhancing her attractiveness and desirability.
    • Love conquers all.
    • Women who choose to leave or divorce are routinely criticised on Oprah, and it is false to suggest they have near universal sympathy from everyone, or free access to the local district attorney to pursue financial claims.
    • Men who choose to leave or divorce are never regarded as irresponsible or deadbeats.
    • It is not true that men have few rights with respect to custody, other than the freedom to hire a lawyer of their own choosing to pursue a protracted and expensive legal case in a court system that vastly prefers the rights of the mother. Women never deny or otherwise interfere with visitation rights for capricious reasons. That simply doesn't happen.
    • Writing ascerbic posts on Slashdot on the subject of mating is proof of a history of bad relationships, bad choices, and/or failed marriages. It is "unpossible" that the poster is simply having fun reiterating fairly mundane observations made by him and countless others for longer than most care to remember.

    Smooch! My apologies, of course, for presuming Slashdot is primarily a male audience. ;-) No offense meant.