Interview With Sun CEO Jonathan Schwartz
Engadget recently grabbed a few minutes with Sun CEO Jonathan Schwartz. They were able to get some great information on the JavaFX Mobile platform as well as Java on the iPhone and how the struggle against Microsoft is going with respect to open source.
Java sucks cock. Slowly and laboriously.
A few years ago, while browsing around the library downtown, I had to take a piss. As I entered the john, a big beautiful all-American football hero type, about twenty five, came out of one of the booths. I stood at the urinal looking at him out of the corner of my eye as he washed his hands. He didn't once look at me. He was "straight" and married -- and in any case I was sure I wouldn't have a chance with him.
As soon as he left, I darted into the booth he'd vacated, hoping there might be a lingering smell of shit and even a seat still warm from his sturdy young ass. I found not only the smell but the shit itself. He'd forgotten to flush. And what a treasure he had left behind. Three or four beautiful specimens floated in the bowl. It apparently had been a fairly dry, constipated shit, for all were fat, stiff, and ruggedly textured. The real prize was a great feast of turd -- a nine inch gastrointestinal triumph as thick as a man's wrist. I knelt before the bowl, inhaling the rich brown fragrance and wondered if I should obey the impulse building up inside me. I'd always been a heavy rimmer and had lapped up more than one little clump of shit, but that had been just an inevitable part of eating ass and not an end in itself.
Of course I'd had jerkoff fantasies of devouring great loads of it (what rimmer hasn't?), but I had never done it. Now, here I was, confronted with the most beautiful five-pound turd I'd ever feasted my eyes on, a sausage fit to star in any fantasy and one I knew to have been hatched from the asshole of the world's handsomest young stud.
Why not? I plucked it from the bowl, holding it with both hands to keep it from breaking.
I lifted it to my nose. It smelled like rich, ripe limburger (horrid, but thrilling), yet had the consistency of cheddar. What is cheese anyway but milk turning to shit without the benefit of a digestive tract? I gave it a lick and found that it tasted better then it smelled. I've found since then that shit nearly almost does. I hesitated no longer. I shoved the fucking thing as far into my mouth as I could get it and sucked on it like a big brown cock, beating my meat like a madman. I wanted to completely engulf it and bit off a large chunk, flooding my mouth with the intense, bittersweet flavor. To my delight I found that while the water in the bowl had chilled the outside of the turd, it was still warm inside. As I chewed I discovered that it was filled with hard little bits of something I soon identified as peanuts. He hadn't chewed them carefully and they'd passed through his body virtually unchanged. I ate it greedily, sending lump after peanutty lump sliding scratchily down my throat. My only regret was the donor of this feast wasn't there to wash it down with his piss. I soon reached a terrific climax. I caught my cum in the cupped palm of my hand and drank it down. Believe me, there is no more delightful combination of flavors than the hot sweetness of cum with the rich bitterness of shit. Afterwards I was sorry that I hadn't made it last longer. But then I realized that I still had a lot of fun in store for me. There was still a clutch of virile turds left in the bowl. I tenderly fished them out, rolled them into my hankercheif, and stashed them in my briefcase.
In the week to come I found all kinds of ways to eat the shit without bolting it right down. Once eaten it's gone forever unless you want to filch it third hand out of your own asshole -- not an unreasonable recourse in moments of desperation or simple boredom.
I stored the turds in the refrigerator when I was not using them but within a week they were all gone.
The last one I held in my mouth without chewing, letting it slowly dissolve. I had liquid shit trickling down my throat for nearly four hours. I must have had six orgasms in the process. I often think of that lovely young guy dropping solid gold out of his sweet, pink asshole every day, never knowing what joy it could, and at least once did,bring to a grateful shiteater.
Looks like Java is finally becoming what they wanted it to be. A platform on which to deploy the same program, regardless of the underlying hardware. too bad it's only on mobile phones.
First of all, this was on Engadget Mobile, so it's strictly limited to porting Java to portable devices.
That said, here's a typical question:
"Jonathan, we have videotape of you mooning the CEO of Apple and saying "Not until after hell freezes over you SOB." This seems to indicate some difficulties in getting Java on the iPhone."
"Absolutely not! There aren't any technical challenges to porting Java. We can completely get it done man, just as long as Apple doesn't screw around again. There are no technical problems. Technical issues aren't there. Nope. No way."
The sooner someone smashes that pony-tailed freak in, the better.
"People who do stupid things with hazardous materials often die." -- Jim Davidson on alt.folklore.urban
This whole first post bashing culture is really getting tiring. It's to the point now where it's not even worth it to get the first post, because regardless of what you say it's just going to get modded to hell by people who really shouldn't have mod points.
Take this guy. He either forgot to hit "post anonymously" or just doesn't care about your crap. Second, he seemed to read the article and have an opinion that had a bit of humor with a biting edge. If you don't agree with it, prove your point instead of bashing his post down. It's really getting sickening when nerds wield their modstick like fucking Darth Maul.
If judge Kimball rules that SCO had no rights to sell sun a license to open source solaris, will Sun go to bat for the Open solaris community or leave them hang under a legal cloud?
Open Solaris may soon be legally encumbered once again, because Sun and Schwartz failed to do due diligence in finding out who really owns unix.
"the Sun software apparently looked eerily like the Apple iPhone's software; in fact, the platform Sun CEO Jonathan Schwartz showed off is already being dubbed "jPhone" based on the striking resemblance to Apple's goods.... Scott McNealy alluded to the copying of Apple's modus operandi by wearing a black t-shirt..."
It doesn't surprise me when I see Apple-Sun coherence or imitation. Schwartz's roots are in NeXTStep/Cocoa development. I'm actually surprised there isn't more with Schwartz at the helm.
Tweet, tweet.
I don't know what it is, but Sun seem to want to be Apple for some strange reason.
The parent has a point. Just because Mr Schwarz is a CEO of a household name and just because he's talking about open source doesn't make it a worthy article. It's full of drivel and very boring to read. Our humble down-modded first-poster was trying to save us a bit of time. There is nothing new in this engadget article. Slow news day.. move along!
Do it yourself, because no one else will do it yourself. [beta blockade 10-17 Feb]
It's funny to see how a lot of posts are about the quality of Java (or the lack thereof) instead of whether or not it can run on the iPhone. But sadly enough for good reasons. I, for one, don't care whether or not it runs on the iPhone, since - here it comes, drums please - Java is (still) unreasonably slow. There. We've had it. It has been said. Again. And rightfully so. Seriously now, the *relatively* limited processing power of handheld devices like the iPhone does actually make me wonder why I would want to run Java on it in the first place - I haven't seen any real, tangible progress at all during the last couple of years as far as Java performance is concerned. People who claim that Java code is "(almost) as fast as compiled code" should get their facts straight and if there is one thing that Real Life has shown us, then it is the fact that - NO - Java programs do NOT run on every platform - they are (on average) about as cross-platform compatible as C or C++ programs. I mean, let's face it: isn't it strange that I'm actually surprised whenever I open an applet in my browser and it actually WORKS? Please, just get rid of this Over Object Oriented experiment...
2500 people laid off and dismal stock price. Off 3% just today.
Where's the open source mobile platform that will run on top of third-party hardware?
I think about this every time I look at the OpenMoko and Qtopia stuff. I don't think that producing hardware designs is a bad thing per se, but I don't understand why there hasn't been more effort at rolling out distro for mobiles hobbyists could install on existing phones they might have lying around.
I understand there are Linux-based phones. But think about where FOSS computing might be if Linux and BSD had to wait for custom-designed hardware, or for a manufacturer to build a PC around that product. There'd have been nowhere near the growth.
There needs to be mobile FOSS for more-or-less commodity hardware if there's really going to be a part for it to play in the growth in the mobile market.
Tweet, tweet.
like to say something. I lost my believe in Sun. ;)
Sure, they are the greastest (commercial) supporters of open source. No denying that.
Great, my last OS-Project was a load of bullshit (unless you consider a really simple servlet type server interresting) but well, i do like open source, and try to to it when possible. Yeah just me, and probibly millions or others, well not everybody does the "great" next project. I just hope i am not the only one to believe in the power of individuals.
In case your reading, remove me from any further responinsibilities Sun, my true name is Syren Baran, you should have me in your records
They already have aping apple covered.
They OWN star office & run X windows so aping Xerox PARC http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xerox_PARC is well & truly covered.
And they're buying innovation left right & centre.
So it seems as though (beneath it all) they're REALLY aping Microsoft. (^-^)
All they have to do is ape Microsoft some more & enter into a cross-licensing deal with Novell.
Perhaps they are secretly destined to rule the desktop of the 64bit age.
thx e
Sure, they are the greastest (commercial) supporters of open source. No denying that.
There's plenty of denying that.
Advice: on VPS providers
There's plenty of denying that.
Sure you can deny the sky is blue if you wanted to as well. However an independent study created for the EU says otherwise. The study also backs up Sun Microsystemsâ(TM) claim to be the biggest donator of open source code. The top ten business contributors were as follows:1 Sun Microsystems 51,372 Person-months 312m euros
2 IBM 14,865 Person-months 90m euros
3 Red Hat 9,748 Person-months 59m euros
4 Silicon Graphics 7,736 Person-months 47m euros
5 SAP 7,493 Person-months 46m euros
6 MySQL 5,747 Person-months 35m euros
7 Netscape 5,249 Person-months 32m euros
8 Ximian 4,985 Person-months 30m euros
9 Realnetworks 4,412 Person-months 27m euros
10 AT&T 4,286 Person-months 26m euros Also from here. "Did you know that Sun contributes more than $200 million per year of intellectual property to the open source movement, in dozens of open source projects? The companyâ(TM)s historical contribution tops $2 billion. WOW!" A list of some of the open source projects Sun contributes to can be found on that link.
Open Source Java DAO Generator
That's a valid response to the original post. The analogy I was objecting to wasn't.
:)
Though I do have one objection to Novell's reported announcement:
"We're not interested in suing people over Unix," Novell spokesman Bruce Lowry said. "We're not even in the Unix business anymore."
Since Linux is UNIX in every sense of the word that remains meaningful, that's hardly true.
It's kind of a real-life example of Russell's Paradox. If they do pursue UNIX copyrights but exclude Linux, they would be keeping a definition of UNIX (albeit one that has never been a particularly useful one) alive... but by abandoning that then only the functional definition of UNIX retains any meaning, and by that definition Linux quacks as loudly as anything else that implements and lives upon the traditional UNIX API...
They don't get the option of not being "in the UNIX business", they just get to pick what kind of business that is.
Anyone have any idea what this guy is talking about?
The irony is Java originated from workong on small hardware devices, and now Sun is scrambling to make it dominant on popular small hardware devices. They've been missing many important junctures along the way since 1995, especially when iPhone or Android can comparatively come in overnight and usurp good portions of the market.
I've been a Sun shareholder for about 7 years now. I hate to admit how much this has cost me, not to mention my retirement funds.
The question I would like to ask CEO executives, is when are they going to stop selling hype and start selling proudcts that sell and make the company some money? As it is now, they only seem to be able to generate hype and and more stock options for executives. Otherwise, I see little reason to expect Sun will exist much longer. After all, any new startup can generate hype, which is very much in oversupply these days.
Frankly, I can't understand why I should continue to hold this worthless stock and my best best for "making" any money seems to be selling the stock (now down 99.9% from where I bought it for a loss so that I can defray other tax liabilities.
Sun stock seems to make the dollar look sound.
Next time you interview the CEO, perhaps you can ask him this question. In the long run, strip away the hype and its the only one that matters for SUN, which appears to be continue to set as I speak.
By the way, the numbers for LOC from the study are from contributions to Debian. Not for all of Sun's OS contributions. So OpenSolaris and OpenJDK etc are not included.
Sun stock seems to make the dollar look sound. Sounds like you bought during the dot com era when Sun's stock price really shot up. Even McNeally was questioning analysts why his company's stock was trading at 10x revenues. You're not going to make your money back. It took a long time for the stock to find it's bottom. The market went crazy with a bunch of companies, Sun included. It's not their fault the stock went up so high. While many of them benefited from this, in the long run I think it really hurt the company. Though it's their own fault they continued to keep splitting the stock.
Past few years though it's been doing pretty well up until the 10/07 and the recent 23% drop. It's been keeping inline with IBM, HPQ, DELL and other stocks in that segment. It's never going to have the type of increase you need to break even.
After a long stint of losses they finally started having consistent profitable quarters. Not sure why, but 1st and 3rd quarters aren't their strongest. This recent downturn might be a good buying opportunity since historically Q4 is usually when their biggest revenue quarter. I'm going by calendar quarters not their FY.
Open Source Java DAO Generator
IBM at least has the decency to do openness, then cut machines out of the HCL. Sun just expects people to play along or be stonewalled.
Twitter supports and protects racists - by smearing their critics with the "Hate Speech" label.
Twitter supports and protects racists - by smearing their critics with the "Hate Speech" label.