Slashdot Mirror
Getting Rid of Staff With High Access?
HikingStick writes "I've been in the tech field for over 15 years. After more than nine years with the same company, I've been asked to step in and establish an IT department for a regional manufacturing firm. I approached my company early, providing four weeks notice (including a week of pre-scheduled [and pre-approved] vacation time). I have a number of projects to complete, and had planned to document some of the obscure bits of knowledge I've gleaned over the past nine years for the benefit of my peers, so I figured that would give me plenty of time. That was on a Friday. The following Monday, word came down from above that all of my privileged access was to be removed — immediately. So, here I sit, stripped of power with weeks ahead of me. From discussions with my peers in other companies, I know that cutting off high-privilege users is common, but usually in conjunction with a severance offer (to keep their hands off the network during those final weeks, especially if there is any ill-will). Should I argue for restored access, highlight the fact that I am currently a human paperweight, request a severance package, or simply become the most prolific Slashdot poster over the next few weeks? Does your company have a policy/process for dealing with high-privilege users who give notice? What is it, and do you make exceptions?"
I would imagine those sorts of working conditions might be enough to flare up your old back pain condition, making it difficult to attend work on a daily basis.
Please read my Canon EOS tech blog at http://www.everyothershot.com
Wow, I will have to remember to give four weeks notice next time instead of two.
Thanks for the heads up!
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
You're possibly getting paid to surf the Internet all day, the best job there every was, and you're wanting to go back to working hard for the Man?
if you think that this will make you the only person taking a pay check to sit around all day and do nothing more than post to slashdot, you are sorely mistaken.
It's hard to believe that's how Micronians are made. Why don't we see it right now by having you both kiss one another?
We look forward to hearing from you...frequently.
I've calculated my velocity with such exquisite precision that I have no idea where I am.
You could level a character to 70 no problem in 4 weeks. Enjoy!
Make it a malt liquor. I want to be as clever and handsome as possible.
get your work ip address banned by slashdot and wikipedia.
Do you even lift?
These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.
I'd get way more creative than that. Misuse all the office supplies you can. For instance, write a lengthy daily report and print it in as many formats as you can (Babelfish it into every language, print it in landscape, use funny fonts, etc.), and then use at least 20 or 30 paperclips to hold it together.
Waste others' time the way they are wasting yours. Request frequent meetings with superiors to go over your daily reports. Hold very frequent meetings with random groups of underlings to discuss strange topics. For example, you could have an 8:15 meeting with the receptionist, an entry-level programmer, and a sock puppet regarding the situation in Myanmar, followed by a 9:00 meeting with the same entry-level programmer, a different sock puppet, and the janitor regarding your detailed synopsis of the new Indiana Jones movie.
Make loud phone calls about your internal organs. Bring cake every day and insist that it's someone's birthday. Mix cat food in with Chex Mix and leave a bowl of it in the break room - see how much is gone at the end of the day. Etc.
Just because you aren't allowed to do any work doesn't mean you have to be bored or watch grass grow to pass the time.
I almost forgot one. Give seminars/lessons/tutorials on various, purely trivial topics. Teach the history of the ampersand or the origins of the Gin and Tonic.
He tries to interrupt me with some lame explanation, but I'm having none of it. I pick up his stupid little "certificate of excellence" award he got at the last quarterly meeting and throw it against the wall, shattering it to pieces. He tries to call security, but I rip the phone out of his hand and continue to hurl abuse that would make the paint peel if he didn't keep the office at 60 goddamn degrees all the time, rendering it permanently encased in ice.
Finally, some of my fellow co-workers come in and ask what's going on. I tell them I've been laid off, and so they start in on the boss too. How could you do this to our best employee, who do you think you are, etc. By this time, my boss is in a corner in the fetal position weeping softly. My two co-workers quit on the spot in solidarity, and throw their laptops at my boss, who is knocked unconcious by one of them, while the other smashes into his new 24" wide-screen HD monitor.
At last, my co-workers head off to the bar to continue the rant about the injustice of it all, while I go back to my desk to put my "wall o' tech books" in a box. While, I'm there, I happen to notice the back of my computer. Turns out I had knocked the Ethernet cable out with my foot.
Oops.
That works really well when you need a reference for your next job.
Haida Manga
The moderator must have fallen for the cat-food-in-Chex-trick. Too close to home to be a neutral.
Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
Some people are doing that for years! A guy I know tried to figure out how much time it will take Microsoft to fire him.
So he didn't do anything, not even touching the keyboard.
But it didn't work. At the end, he became too bored, and decided to quit himself..
I was hoping for insightful mods. Apparently, the moderators think I'm not serious.
Don't forget to go fishing and then bring the fish in to clean on your desk.
appended to the end of comments you post, 120 chars