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Would You Rent a Song For a Dime?

Posted by kdawson on from the twenty-million-says-you-will dept.

An anonymous reader writes "What's worse than a padlocking every song so that they will only play on certain devices? How about selling (renting) you songs that work on no devices? Astonishingly, this is what the music industry thinks we need. Warner Music is spending $20 million to back Lala, a startup devising a service to convince people to 'buy' 'web songs' for 10 cents each; these are then kept for safekeeping only by Lala with no download privileges. Industry insider Michael Robertson leaks the facts on this scheme, along with a seekrit URL so you can try it out."

20 of 580 comments (clear)

  1. Would you lick my balls for a quarter? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I would rent a song for a dime if you would lick my balls for a quarter.

    1. Re:Would you lick my balls for a quarter? by moderatorrater · · Score: 4, Funny

      It's easier than what the RIAA makes us do for two and a half songs.

    2. Re:Would you lick my balls for a quarter? by phat_cartman · · Score: 5, Funny

      Once I ate 5 pennies, and shit a nickel.

  2. Harrumph by RollingThunder · · Score: 5, Funny

    Music Search: nerdcore

    Sorry, no matches for you.

    Sorry, no business for you.

  3. Re:Imaginary Property by QRDeNameland · · Score: 4, Funny

    As long as it's an imaginary ten cents...

    --
    Momentarily, the need for the construction of new light will no longer exist.
  4. (cue piano music) by jd · · Score: 5, Funny
    Imagine there's no Lala,

    And paying for is to buy.
    No Warner below us,
    Above us, metro wi-fi
    Imagine all the artists
    Getting paid the full amount.

    Imagine there's no IP
    Nor music tax for you
    Nothng to lawsuit over
    And no Sony too
    Imagine all the people
    Owning what they have

    You may say I'm unAmerican
    And your lawyer's just begun
    I hope someday you'll .torrent
    And the world will be as one.

    --
    It's a small world and it smells funny; I'd buy another if it wasn't for the money; Take back what I paid (SoM)
    1. Re:(cue piano music) by willyhill · · Score: 5, Funny
      Completely offtopic here, but the other day I overheard the 14-year old daughter of a friend of mine remarking on what a beautiful song David Archuleta had written to sing in American Idol, and how he should have, like, totally won the competition if only for that.

      I excused myself, went to the bathroom upstairs and laughed uncontrollably into a towel (to muffle the sound) for about five minutes.

      --
      The twitter monologues. Click on my homepage and be amazed.
    2. Re:(cue piano music) by AtariKee · · Score: 5, Funny

      These are the kids that will be running the country soon. I would have suffocated myself.

      --
      "You're getting brutal, Sark. Brutal and needlessly sadistic."
      "Thank you, Master Control"
      -Sark and the MCP
    3. Re:(cue piano music) by MadMidnightBomber · · Score: 3, Funny

      You haven't really experienced "Imagine" until you've heard it in the original Klingon.

      --
      "It doesn't cost enough, and it makes too much sense."
  5. Re:Lala sounded familiar... by flaming+error · · Score: 3, Funny

    > I thought I had heard of Lala before.

    Me too. And if TimeWarner is listening, I have a startup that needs funding. We're calling it Tinky Winky.

  6. *laughs* by OMNIpotusCOM · · Score: 5, Funny

    I wish I had mod points for you two. For $0.10 apiece you can pretend I modded you up.

    1. Re:*laughs* by mrbluze · · Score: 5, Funny

      I wish I had mod points for you two. For $0.10 apiece you can pretend I modded you up. Mod Point Rule #1: The Mod Point Fairy only gives you mod points when you don't want them.
      --
      Do it yourself, because no one else will do it yourself. [beta blockade 10-17 Feb]
  7. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 3, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  8. Zis is verry funny! by antek9 · · Score: 5, Funny
    Def.: the Slashdot Effect: Look here, a secret URL I just found, but shhh, don't go there and don't tell anyone!

    One Question for Miss Morissette: Slashdotting a music service that is essentially nothing but a denial of service (a.k.a. sham), which effectively puts it out of service for a while, is that

    a.) ironic, or

    b.) a self-fulfilling prophesy?

    --
    A World in a Grain of Sand / Heaven in a Wild Flower,
    Infinity in the Palm of your Hand / And Eternity in an Hour.
    1. Re:Zis is verry funny! by cjb658 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Slashdotting a music service that is essentially nothing but a denial of service (a.k.a. sham), which effectively puts it out of service for a while. Click Here!
    2. Re:Zis is verry funny! by Opportunist · · Score: 3, Funny

      Oh c'mon, do you have to spit into the soup? That site will never have that much traffic in its lifetime again.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  9. Re:Mod point fairy by mrbluze · · Score: 3, Funny

    I just got hit with redundant for talking about CowboyNeal's taint on another story. I would mod you up as underrated but mod fairy rule #1 applies.
    --
    Do it yourself, because no one else will do it yourself. [beta blockade 10-17 Feb]
  10. Re:Imaginary Property by Tony+Hoyle · · Score: 4, Funny

    Is that what you buy cheap french cars with?

  11. Re:Imaginary Property by anexkahn · · Score: 3, Funny

    Will they accept my World of Warcraft currency?

    --
    Curious about Storage and Virtualization? Check out
  12. Re:Imaginary Property by Phybersyk0 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Quote:
    topherhenk said:
    "So you can listen to it online as much as you want for $0.10, you just can't take it with you."
    Heh, says you. Creative Labs SoundBlaster Audigy ZS2 "What-U-Hear" Recording controls say differently. i gotz mp3's now bitchez!!!!