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Full Body Scanners Installed In 10 US Airports

Lapzilla brings word that airports around the US are beginning to use a new type of body-scanning machine which records pictures of travelers underneath their clothing. The process takes roughly 30 seconds, and the person viewing the pictures is located in a separate room. We've discussed similar scanners in the past. From USAToday: "[Barry Steinhardt, head of the ACLU technology project] said passengers would be alarmed if they saw the image of their body. 'It all seems very clinical and non-threatening -- you go through this portal and don't have any idea what's at the other end,' he said. Passengers scanned in Baltimore said they did not know what the scanner did and were not told why they were directed into the booth. Magazine-sized signs are posted around the checkpoint explaining the scanners, but passengers said they did not notice them."

21 of 454 comments (clear)

  1. Auntie Mandy's No-Scan Panties by gbulmash · · Score: 5, Funny
    Okay, first thing... the woman in the scanner looks like she's trying to keep a hula hoop in motion.

    Second thing:

    The scanners do a good job seeing under clothing but cannot see through plastic or rubber materials that resemble skin, said Peter Siegel, a senior scientist at the California Institute of Technology. "You probably could find very common materials that you could wrap around you that would effectively obscure things," Siegel said.


    Wonder if it would be legal to sell a line of rubberized scan-proof lingerie?

    "Auntie Mandy's No-Scan Panties: The TSA won't see your va-jay-jay today"
    "Bodacious Ta's Rubber Bras: If the TSA wants to see your nipples, make 'em buy you dinner first."
    "Mr. Happy's Super Sleeves: Take a 'tripod' through the TSA scanner."

    - Greg
    1. Re:Auntie Mandy's No-Scan Panties by Plazmid · · Score: 2, Funny

      Will covering my self with Aluminium foil work? What about sewing in copper wire into my clothing? Or how about a spazy self-ironig suit, that has titanium thread woven into it?(marketed for travellers)

    2. Re:Auntie Mandy's No-Scan Panties by Mista2 · · Score: 5, Funny

      I'd rather just write Fuck You in zinc cream or something I know will be reflective to the scanner all over my body 8)

  2. That's why I'm working on my . . . by rev_sanchez · · Score: 4, Funny

    Silence of the Lambs style human skin suit. A man needs his privacy.

    --
    If you didn't come to party don't bother knocking on my door. Prince '1999'
  3. Re:Ewwww... by Verteiron · · Score: 4, Funny

    Since I'm pretty sure you can't board the plane without showing ID at some point, what will probably happen is you won't fly anywhere that day.

    Unless you look foreign. Then you'll fly down south for a nice vacation somewhere sunny. Like Cuba.

    --
    End of lesson. You may press the button.
  4. Re:And this is one of the reasons why... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I totally agree -- but nobody will rent me a car for my trip to Europe. ;) AC, meet Boat.

    Boat, meet AC.
  5. Re:And this is one of the reasons why... by fyngyrz · · Score: 2, Funny

    Add to that the fact that the average airline seat was designed to fit the human body perfectly... by testing the fit against a one-armed, one-legged midget with a fetish for being confined.

    --
    I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
  6. Alone? Separate Room? by D+Ninja · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...airports around the US are beginning to use a new type of body-scanning machine which records pictures of travelers underneath their clothing. The process takes roughly 30 seconds, and the person viewing the pictures is located in a separate room. So, basically, it's like one of those "private rooms" in a porn shop. Except, the slide show pictures come every thirty seconds and you could get anybody from the hot blonde who is heading to Florida with her friends to...well...this guy (possibly NSFW).
  7. Re:Might be more accurate to say centimeter waves by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    the image resolution isn't going to be much better than 1 cm - which is certainly adequate to determine gender.
    You're new around here, aren't you?
  8. Re:Geez, by mrbluze · · Score: 5, Funny
    From FTA:

    "Most passengers don't think it's any big deal," Schear said. "They think it's a piece of security they're willing to do." Yeah, most people just wish deep down they could walk around the airport naked in the first place.
    --
    Do it yourself, because no one else will do it yourself. [beta blockade 10-17 Feb]
  9. I'm going through with a hardon by Profane+MuthaFucka · · Score: 3, Funny

    Gotta give those TSA pukes a little thrill. Or maybe I'll go through wearing a wig and a dress. The female screener will REALLY enjoy that. I wonder if anyone ever rubbed one out as the passed through the metal detector?

    I'm just trying to make travel more enjoyable for everybody.

    --
    Fascism trolls keeping me up every night. When I starts a preachin', he HITS ME WITH HIS REICH!
  10. Re:Diseases by robo_mojo · · Score: 2, Funny

    Only if the tumor is in the shape of a gun or knife.

  11. Re:Geez, by squidinkcalligraphy · · Score: 5, Funny

    Actually, it's fat people that can compromise security. You could quite easily hide something such as a knife in a fold of fat (OK, obese people). That won't get picked up by the scanner.

    --
    "I think it would be a good idea" Gandhi, on Western Civilisation
  12. Re:um, radiation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Obviously, he spent many years studying physics 101.

  13. Re:Cavity search? by Admiral+Ag · · Score: 5, Funny

    If someone puts a ceramic knife in his rectum, then my bet is that he's so hardcore he can't be stopped.

    --
    "by that I mean people who don't sit on slashdot all day wondering why everyone else isn't building robots" DECS
  14. Re:And this is one of the reasons why... by Admiral+Ag · · Score: 4, Funny

    I take it you haven't been a patron of the British rail system then.

    --
    "by that I mean people who don't sit on slashdot all day wondering why everyone else isn't building robots" DECS
  15. Re:Cavity search? by risinganger · · Score: 2, Funny

    I mean - what's to stop a hijacker from hiding a ceramic knife up his rectum? Hopefully common-sense.

    /me looks for the guy that screams in pain when he sits down too fast...

  16. Re:Geez, by catxk · · Score: 3, Funny

    If you're so fat you can hide stuff in your folds, I doubt you'll be able to cause much damage either way.

    --
    Don't be crazy anymore!
  17. Re:Ewwww... by BJH · · Score: 3, Funny

    So the best way to get a weapon through the metal detector is by sticking it in your pocket?

    Thanks for the tip...

  18. Re:Geez, by WilyCoder · · Score: 2, Funny

    And yet I keep going back. Hmmmmm...

  19. Solution for the guys by NIckGorton · · Score: 1, Funny

    Decline the scan, then when it comes time for your pat down, gay it up so much that you when in comes time for your pat down, gay it up so much that you make Carson Kressley look like Chuck Norris. Then make a joke about a full body cavity search.

    You will be out of there in 3 seconds flat.

    I had to go through the Lubbock TX airport. I was wearing a superqueer shirt, and when they pulled me aside, I was like sure honey, but are you gonna buy me dinner first? Blink-blink.... he chuckled nervously at which point I said, well if you want to do a full body cavity search would you mind if I brought BF in here to watch?