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Troll Patents Lists In Databases, Sues Everyone
I Don't Believe in Imaginary Property writes "A Florida patent troll called Channel Intelligence is suing everyone from Lemonade to Remember the Milk for infringing on patent 6,917,941, which covers storing a wishlist in a database. Amazon and eBay are absent from the list of targets, even though they very likely store users' wishlists in a database. With any luck, perhaps one of the defendants will get to use that precedent PJ found the other day from In re Lintner, which said, '[c]laims which are broad enough to read on obvious subject matter are unpatentable even though they also read on non-obvious subject matter.'"
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Spanging this guy and all other patent trolls like him in the face with a coal shovel is high on my personal wishlist, and Slashdot is now storing that information in their comment database. Sorry Taco!
Slashdot Burying Stories About Slashdot Media Owned
Oh hell, I have to call my lawyer. I need to patent writing wish lists on paper with a pencil, another patent for a wish list with blue ink, another for black ink, and crayons... By golly when I get done with my patent trolling I'll be rich!
Drinks for the house!
mcgrew's razor: Never attribute to stupidity that which can be explained by greedy self-interest
1. Wish this wishlist on Slashdot
2. Wish this post is stored in database
3. Wish that troll sees it
4. Wish that troll sues Slashdot
5. Wish that troll wins case
6. Wish that I get credit for my efforts
7. Wish for profit from percentage of settlement
If you post it, they will read.
Guys, all we have to do to stop the madness is get the proper patent. Let's see...
"A method for securing profits by describing an idea of sufficient generality and utility that its use is inevitable, then bringing legal claims against the most successful groups to implement it."
PWND!!
I'll take "Something That Would Stop This Sort of Nonsense" for a thousand, Alex.
No mod points, no meta-moderating/Firehose/all the other free work Slashdot wants me to do.
Poor Santa Clause is going to be sued for 1.8 billion infringements.
Table-ized A.I.
Would "assassination politics" work for patent trolls too? /waits for black helicopters.
1q2w3e4r5t6y7u8i9o0pqawsedrftgthyjukilo;p'azsxdcf
Milk
Bread
Shitload of stamps
Ground Chuck
Vitamin Water
Carrots
Defense Attorney
"No freeman shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson
Santa Clause is SCREWED!
Go for it. I've made a fortune with my patent for two click e-commerce checkout.
Talk to Santa Claus, I'm sure he's been keeping lists in databases long before that date.
Geeze, it's just some guys at a patent office
Great going; you just wrote a wish-list of patents, which /. has stored in their DB. You just opened up /. to being sued.
I hold the patent on:
3. ????
Slashdot alone will make me a very rich man.
"Kittens give Morbo gas!"
If storing data in a database is considered 'nonobvious' and patent worthy, then someone please tell me the 'obvious' method of storing data.
Patents!
"Who modded this informative? Whoever it is must've been smokin' some of that martian pot!"
and I have in it a To-Do list, which essentially is a wish-list
No it's not.
No, that would be patent 5,987,808:
"Method or process of transferring kinetic energy gained by the rotational motion of a striking apparatus composed of a handle affixed to a mass of steel in rectangular shape thought an elliptical transverse cavity, said kinetic energy being applied to an elongated metal cylinder composed of a sharp-angled edge at one end and a flattened, thicker surface at the other hand, for the purpose of causing said metal cylinder to penetrate wood or other material. That the operator of the striking apparatus should fail to strike the elongated metal cylinder does not constitute an exception to this method or process."
Note: It would be sad if I had to explain twice.
"Piter, too, is dead."
Anonymous Coward has prior art, you know.
The law should be updated to allow for obvious patent trolls to have a chair thrown and broken over their head. The law will appoint Steve to do the honors of throwing the aforementioned chair.
Ok, now on a more serious point, I really don't understand how patents like this get past the "expert" patent examiners who work at the USPTO. A database is something that is used to keep lists of things. It doesn't matter if it's a list of telephone numbers, a list of customers and vendors, a list of email addresses for a mailing list you manage, a list of husbands you've pissed off by screwing their wives, or a wishlist. Even a monkey can see that this is not only obvious, but is the first method that comes to mind in anyone's mind to keep a list of information. Even if you write down a shopping list on a piece of paper, that piece of paper is essentially a "database." So on a more serious note of how the law should be updated: If you file an obvious troll patent like this and it gets overturned on the grounds of being obvious, you should be compelled to pay back anyone you've charged for the use of the patent, plus interest, and the patent examiners who let it get past their desk get fired and ALL patents they've been involved in are revoked automatically. This will help fight the PROBLEM of a runaway patent system.
A patent system, as with a copyright system, is a good thing, but the rights of the entire population must be in balance with the time-limited (for a SHORT time) rights given to the patent or copyright holder. The purpose of both systems is to enrich the entire society by giving people incentive to invent, create, and/or release new things.
McCain/Palin '08. Now THAT's hope and change!
Santa has prior art and if you say otherwise, he'll put you on his naughty list, find where you are sleeping, and gun you down.
I want you all to know that i am going to file a patent on thinking. if you as much as think of a wish list i will sue. if you think about a counter suit i will just sue you for thinking that. i am sure there is not a patent on thinking so i should be gold!
Patent troll beating up shopkeeper for royalty money: very naughty.
Shopkeeper not paying royalty money: exactly as naughty
I wish all these companies would stop. I have a list of them in a database.
> someone please tell me the 'obvious' method of storing data.
You do a ROT-13, then change the coding to EBCDIC. After that, you create some common Lisp code that takes two arguments--length and offset--and produces the EBCDIC output when run (or just the length of the data stored in the program data if both arguments are nil). Finally, you convert all the parentheses to square brackets (and vice versa, if there were any square brackets in the original), print it out, and photograph each page on a wooden table. You combine the JPEGs from your camera into one giant PDF and then store that in the database.
Simple, no?
To fight this patent would cost us about a half-million dollars plus the time spent in court. We can pay them about 100,000/year and keep our business alive. Guess which option a sane businessman would choose?
Hiring a hitman ?
May contain traces of nut.
Made from the freshest electrons.
And as long as Santa doesn't store that list in a database his franchise will be safe.