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Sen. Ted "Tubes" Stevens Is Indicted

Posted by kdawson on from the eating-our-own-pork dept.

Many readers are letting us know about the indictment of Sen. Ted Stevens on seven counts of making false statements on his financial disclosure forms. We discussed the raid on the senator's house a while back. Everyone's favorite technologically challenged senator is the longest-serving Republican in the history of the upper house. An Alaskan paper gives deep background on the probe that has ensnared Stevens and a number of other Alaska political figures.

14 of 553 comments (clear)

  1. tee-hee by jollyreaper · · Score: 5, Funny

    There's a joke here about federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison and clogged tubes but I'm just going to savor the indictment instead.

    --
    Kwisatz Haderach
    Sell the spice to CHOAM
    This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
    1. Re:tee-hee by mattpm · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unsolicited male in his tubes?

    2. Re:tee-hee by Hognoxious · · Score: 4, Funny

      At the moment it's only his finances that are being probed.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    3. Re:tee-hee by infonography · · Score: 5, Funny

      the senator will be learning a new line;

      You've got Male!

      --
      Sorry about the writing. Robot fingers, you know? Cliff Steele in DOOM PATROL #23
    4. Re:tee-hee by AmaDaden · · Score: 5, Funny

      His first name is "The" and his last name is "People".

    5. Re:tee-hee by Wiseblood1 · · Score: 5, Funny

      No, it was the Spanish Inquisition. Poor Ted never even saw it coming.

      --
      A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking
    6. Re:tee-hee by geminidomino · · Score: 5, Funny

      His first name is "The" and his last name is "People".

      Aww, aren't you cute. You actually believe that, don't you. That's just precious.

  2. Down the tubes.. by The+Dancing+Panda · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's not just a truck you can dump things on....

    It's a house, that you can add things to...apparently for free.

  3. Well, there goes another political career... by QRDeNameland · · Score: 4, Funny

    down the...ummm...drain.

    --
    Momentarily, the need for the construction of new light will no longer exist.
  4. Tubes dance mix by theCat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Enjoy:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=_cZC67wXUTs

    --
    =^..^= all your rodent are belong to us
  5. Re:Series of Tubes by MarkGriz · · Score: 5, Funny

    He's an 80+ year old Senator

    Age is not an automatic criteria for cluelessness

    You ignored the part about him being a Senator

    --
    Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.
  6. Re:Series of Tubes by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Funny

    You also call a computer a "box", but I doubt anyone would think a shoebox can serve the same purpose, or would compare it with one when it comes to getting math problems solved.

    Jargon doesn't have to be accurate. It rarely is. How often do you have to search for your data that you put on a "heap" (provided you can code, that is)? How often do you kick your system while you "boot" it? Ever tried to bend or even fold a 3.5" "floppy disc"? Have you ever made out with a port because it's got a female connector? Do you have to keep your cat away from your "mouse"? Ever unlocked your door with something you got from a "keyboard"?

    The audience is encouraged to come up with worse jargon abuse.

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  7. Uh-oh, "hypocrisy" by mi · · Score: 4, Funny

    There is nothing particularly hypocritical in denouncing, what you think is an awful idea, while milking it for as long as it is forced upon you anyway.

    --
    In Soviet Washington the swamp drains you.
  8. Re:Nobody by Sponge+Bath · · Score: 5, Funny

    McCain and Stevens have been opposing each other on key issues...

    Ah yes, the Geritol "Tastes great/Less Filling" debate.