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Robotic Prostheses For Human Faces
holy_calamity writes "New Scientist reports on a patent application that suggests implanting polymer muscles beneath the skin of people suffering paralysis of the face to give them control of their features. The technique has already been used successfully to reanimate the eyelids of human cadavers. Movement could be returned to other facial features and even paralyzed limbs in the same way, the surgeons at University of California Davis say. The full patent application is also available on the WIPO site."
> The technique has already been used successfully to reanimate the eyelids of human cadavers.
That'll make such a great party trick.
HOLY BLINKING DEADMAN!!!
I for one welcome our blinking undead overlords.
Is it sad that I am more likely to recognize you and your posts by your sig than your name or UID?
The technique has already been used successfully to reanimate the eyelids of human cadavers.
Hmmm. I had no idea that cadavers had the capacity to control robotic eyelids :)
From the abstract:
Metbods: With use of four cadaver heads, an extended upper and lower blepharoplasty incision was used to secure an upper and lower expanded polytetrafluoroethylene implant in the medial orbital wall and tarsal plates. The slings were passed through a hole drilled in the lateral orbital wall or around a titanium screw. Lateral pull on the sling created eyelid closure, and the necessary distance of pull was measured. Results: The eyelid sling mechanism functioned to achieve complete eyelid closure. Less tension was required for eyelid closure when the sling was placed in both eyelids (3 mm of pull instead of 6 mm). Conclusions: The application of artificial muscle to a range of problems that affect both patient morbidity and quality of life is promising. Eyelid closure was created in a cadaver model using a novel sling, but future studies will need to address the feasibility of a prototype artificial muscle eyelid device in humans.
This is the advance *I'm* waiting for...
Such a long time to wait...
Engineering is the art of compromise.
...read that as robotic human feces?
Before you know it, being dead won't be nearly the handicap it is now.
What's that? I missed the point?
I can't say with 100% certainty how I would feel if I were unfortunate enough to live under circumstances such as these, but I can say that quality of life is an important issue for me as it would be for so many others. People frequently submit DNR orders for just this reason. If for some reason, I cannot move my face muscles and do not somehow acquire better poker playing skills as a result, then I'd say either clone me a new body or let me go. With "W" gone, the way is a little more clear to research ways of growing me a new body. So forget all of this mechanized stuff and let's get into regenerating the body.
If I were a carpenter I'd
Hammer on my piglet, I'd
Collect the seven dollars and I'd
Buy a big prosthetic forehead
And wear it on my real head
Everybody wants prosthetic
Foreheads on their real heads
Everybody wants prosthetic
Foreheads on their real heads
Just disrupt the deflector shield with a tachyon burst.
You can imagine my relief (pun intended) when I realized the title did not read:
Robotic Prostheses For Human Feces
this will be great for people who have suffered horrific burns on their face.
This is no surprise. After all, everybody wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads.
BORG or Skynet? Which is coming first?
Health Insurance Quotes
Since when are surgical procedures patentable? And what are the ethics of patenting this anyway, and likely thereby preventing some people from receiving such treatment, even if it is somehow legal to do so?
Or is the patent specific to the artificial muscles?
"What in the name of Fats Waller is that?"
"A four-foot prune."
> The technique has already been used successfully to reanimate the eyelids of human cadavers
Err...sorry... that's just my former college roommate. He's always like that.
Unless science can find another part of the human anatomy that is problematic when limp, this probably won't get off the ground.
There are 01 kinds of cars in the world. The General Lee, and everything else.
And fixing a deformity isn't worth having to eat baby food for life.
Feels like there's a great danger here of falling deep into the uncanny valley, especially with facial prosthetics.
"I bless every day that I continue to live, for every day is pure profit."
Now they'll have to come out with another sequel to Weekend at Bernie's
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
This is going to make my open-casket funeral so much more interesting!
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
nancy pelosi got this done years ago
Sorry to reply to myself, but here is the patent abstract, from the WIPO site linked in the posting:
So it sure sounds like they're patenting the *procedure*, not just the artificial muscles. This strikes me as of extremely dubious ethical merit, and appears to be a prime example of why method patents are a bad idea.
As in the subject line, just imagine if someone had patented the procedure for performing an appendectomy. Talk about extortion -- "License my patent, or die!"
Admittedly, facial reconstruction surgery, the bailiwick of this particular patent, is not so vital an application of medical technologies, but the simple fact that such procedures *can* apparently be patented is itself deeply troubling.
"What in the name of Fats Waller is that?"
"A four-foot prune."
A prehensile robotic penis, anyone? Kind of like the dolphins have...
Just imagine!
Now we have the technology to re-create the Baywatch "Running down the beach in slow motion" scenes in real time! I just can't wait until breast augmentation candidates can opt for active control of their fun bags instead of the passive systems we now have... "Look at me! I can make them dance!"
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
I originally read this as " Robotic Prostheses For Human Feces". Cool - Bionic Poop!!! (and a fitting analogy for the patent ).
for killing opponents and reanimating their features for a bit to agree wholeheartedly with your policies and then announce their retirement, without all that expense and detection risk of good computer rendering.
A few stories below, I read "The International Federation of Pornographic Industry (IFPI)", which, by the way, seems a quite appropriate description of said federation...
With the development of further robotic enhancements, movie makers would now be able to make movies WITH REAL LIVE..er..DEAD ZOMBIES!!!! Plus, Priscilla Presely and other celebrities with botched facial plastic surgeries and botox treatments can now form more than one facial expression.
Actually, since patents last for only 20 years, likely all that stuff would be in the public domain by now. And we'd have an exact description of how to do it ourselves too, instead of still having to guess at it. As it is, the old fart is keeping it all a trade secret, which is just what patents were supposed to prevent.
On the other hand, I guess 7 of his days in Genesis seem to have been almost 2 billion years each (counting "let there be light" as coinciding with the big bang.) So 20 of his years for the patent to expire... ooer, maybe we don't want to wait that long after all :P
A polar bear is a cartesian bear after a coordinate transform.
Up, I say! Up!!
So now famous actors can botox and still do their job... oh wait
...I'll show up to a meeting, switch to Facial Auto-Pilot mode, fall asleep, and my face will appear to be raising eyebrows in interest when my voice analyzer detects the end of a sentence, smiling when it hears others lauging...
Heck, you could even hook your eyes up to this, automatic blinking, eyes looking around. I will just have to perfect the *wake up* sensor so I know when I can leave the meeting...
Authority questions you. Return the favor.
That'd be helping a husband keep a straight face when his wife asks "Does this make me look fat?"
Did you know 80 to 90% of the moderators on slashdot wouldn't recognize a troll even if one dragged them under a bridge.
"Robotic Prostitutes For Human Feces" - hey, not a bad trade I thought.. Then I put my glases on... :P
Zombies!
cuz I'm at work and can't create a profile
years ago my mother suffered from Bells Palsy. In most of the cases of bells palsy the patient will regain full return of facial nerve control, however for my mother full control of her right eyelid and lip will never happen.
I think that there will be some great uses for this and certainly not trying to bring anyone down, but it'd be nice to see my mom smile or wink again...now back to the robotic feces and flirty cadavers
and I have the Karma to spare, so...
I welcome our new robot zombie overlords!
-
I thought it read "Robotic Prostitutes for Human Feces." Stop thinking, brain of mine...
So, you get botox and freeze your face. ... then you fix it with this?
There are several complaints in this story about posts marked unfairly as "Troll". Yours is one such unfortunate victim.
When's the meta-moderation feature coming back?
Did anyone else read this as "Robotic Prostheses For Human Faeces"?
I, for one, welcome our new cyberpoo overlords.
I hope they come out with the one that 7 of 9 on voyager wears,
cant wait to get one of those for my girlfriend, and also the body suit, that was hot!
In this day and age, we all enjoy a weekend-long elaborate farce, but do we have the time and energy to arrange one? And what guarantees can we have to ensure that the weekend goes without a hitch?
Worry no longer, dear customers, we have just the technology for you!
Robotic Prostheses for Human Feces...
yuk
I'm not going to have a wake when I die, but if I did, I would certainly leave instructions to have these implanted to scare the crap out of the people that came.