Why Japan Hates the iPhone
Ponca City, We love you writes "With a high level of technical sophistication, critical customers, and high innovation rate, Japan is the toughest cell phone market in the world. So it's not surprising that although Apple is the third-largest mobile supplier in the world, selling 10 million units in 2008, in Japan the iPhone is selling so poorly it's being offered for free. The country is famous for being ahead of its time when it comes to technology, and the iPhone just doesn't cut it. For example, Japanese handset users are into video and photos — and the iPhone has neither a video camera, multimedia text messaging, nor a TV tuner. Pricing plans in Japan are also very competitive, and the iPhone's $60-and-up monthly plan is too high compared to competitors; a survey lat year showed that among Japanese consumers, 91% didn't want to buy an iPhone. The cellular weapon of choice in Japan would be the Panasonic P905i, a fancy cellphone that doubles as a 3-inch TV and features 3-G, GPS, a 5.1-megapixel camera, and motion sensors for Wii-style games. 'When I show this to visitors from the US, they're amazed,' according to journalist Nobi Hayashi, who adds, 'Carrying around an iPhone in Japan would make you look pretty lame.'"
Have you ever noticed that they speak some strange version of the Mexican language and look unlike us? Also their food is expensive because we eat cows which are large, plentiful and docile animals, while Japanise people only eat fearsome and rare SHARKS to boast of their manliness. In conclusion, Japan is a far away place somewhere in Mexico where smart people do not eat cows. Thank you will you marry me.
*in your best schoolgirl voice*
Kawaii~~~
or alternatively
*breathing heavily and drooling*
Moe~~~
Depending on whether it's set to vibrate?
'Carrying around an iPhone in Japan would make you look pretty lame.'
It doesn't do much for your reputation in the U.S. either...
I like to use the old Bluetooth headset analogy.
Old Techie: "You know how lumberjacks will sometimes put a big red X on trees?"
Young Techie (who is wearing a bluetooth headset): "Like, yeah."
O.T.: "That big red X is a sign to other lumberjacks that the tree bearing it needs to be culled from the population."
Y.T.: "Culled. That's not really a word, is it?"
O.T.: "The bluetooth headset is the human equivalent."
/s/bluetooth\ headset/iPhone/g
"I'm just here to regulate funkiness."
There are a lot of American things that seem to be chic in Japan, but technology has never really been one of them. It's like trying to impress a German with your precision-engineered American luxury car or something.
10 PRINT CHR$(205.5+RND(1)); : GOTO 10
...every douche already owns one.
I don't.
I drank what? -- Socrates
No, the fact is that the iphone is a piece of crap that doesn't do anything special.
Wrong: there's that one app that displays a zippo lighter, and you can open up the zippo and light it, and then if you tilt the phone the flame ACTUALLY MOVES!
Yeah. Put THAT in your pipe and then use that app to smoke it.
Ah, that explains the spherical white helmet.
I drank what? -- Socrates
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