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Vista Post-SP2 Is the Safest OS On the Planet

pkluss noted Kevin Turner, COO of Microsoft making the proclamation that "Vista today, post-Service Pack 2, which is now in the marketplace, is the safest, most reliable OS we've ever built. It's also the most secure OS on the planet, including Linux and open source and Apple Leopard. It's the safest and most secure OS on the planet today."

44 of 1,010 comments (clear)

  1. I have a feeling.... by Drakin020 · · Score: 5, Funny

    That this thread will consist only of positive remarks, and supportive statements towards Microsoft.

    --
    The greatest revenge in life is massive success.
    1. Re:I have a feeling.... by xmason · · Score: 4, Funny

      That this thread will consist only of positive remarks, and supportive statements towards Microsoft.

      Well, they make some dandy keyboards and mice, and I've always been a fan of Flight Simulator...
       
      ...but that's about all I got here. OS X FTW!

      --
      I'm not cool enough to have a .sig
    2. Re:I have a feeling.... by DigiShaman · · Score: 2, Funny

      Is it reliable (as in stable)? Sure. I have yet to have Vista bomb out on me that wasn't due to a buggy 3rd party driver or faulty hardware.

      Is it safe? Heh, so says the wife beater of software...

      --
      Life is not for the lazy.
    3. Re:I have a feeling.... by ushdfgakj · · Score: 2, Funny

      Maybe you haven't used Vista enough...

    4. Re:I have a feeling.... by Gerzel · · Score: 5, Funny

      Socialism is a form of government not a software license.

    5. Re:I have a feeling.... by JumpDrive · · Score: 4, Funny

      I don't think that Anonymous Coward cares what he gets modded.
      He seems to always be spouting drivel and trash.

    6. Re:I have a feeling.... by AttillaTheNun · · Score: 4, Funny

      You are correct. Last I checked, viruses are free of charge.

    7. Re:I have a feeling.... by David+Gerard · · Score: 4, Funny

      We need a car analogy. Does the car you take it home in have chrome on the bumpers? Or does it have ... CHLORINE???!?!?! This PROVES by the power of car analogy that Google Chrome is a superior operating system to Windows Internet Chlorine!

      --
      http://rocknerd.co.uk
    8. Re:I have a feeling.... by sexconker · · Score: 1, Funny

      Not all of them.
      I paid her 5 dollars and all I got was syphilis!

    9. Re:I have a feeling.... by Lershac · · Score: 5, Funny

      in the olden days... *snigger*.

      In the real olden days it was mislabeled reel tapes

      --
      Chuck
    10. Re:I have a feeling.... by somersault · · Score: 4, Funny

      amazing framerates of 1 and maybe 2

      Would I be correct in assuming the obvious of 1 to 2 frames per pineapple, or are we dealing with a non standard unit here?

      --
      which is totally what she said
    11. Re:I have a feeling.... by clem · · Score: 2, Funny

      Age of Empires was fun.

      --
      Your courageous and selfless spelling corrections have made me a better person.
    12. Re:I have a feeling.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I resent that accusation.

  2. Please don't by Daimanta · · Score: 5, Funny

    In the history of man there have been several cases of fatal hilarity(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatal_Hilarity) and this article might inflict this seemingly comical effect on technically concious people.

    Posting an article like this without thinking about the consequences might actually hurt and kill people. Please don't.

    --
    Knowledge is power. Knowledge shared is power lost.
  3. Fools? by JJman · · Score: 3, Funny

    Checks current date. No, not the 1st.
    Checks date on the article. No, still not the 1st (though eight days different).

    Well, somebody's a fool.

    1. Re:Fools? by dltaylor · · Score: 4, Funny

      Only 8 days late? For M$, that's better than their normal delivery.

  4. Re:what? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    But it IS the safest - it now fails to boot.

  5. time machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    What did he compare to, System 7 and Linux kernel 1.0?

  6. post SP2? by mugnyte · · Score: 4, Funny

      Did he mention that Vista post SP2, there is no network stack? Fwoppies FTW!

  7. "Cancel or Allow" by starglider29a · · Score: 2, Funny

    You are about to boot up your Windows Computer -- (C)ancel, (A)llow, (F)ail

    Yep, most secure, indeed!

  8. In further news... by Jason+Earl · · Score: 4, Funny

    Richard Stallman announced in a press conference today that Emacs is the safest operating system on the planet. According to Stallman Emacs is safer than Linux, Windows Vista, or Apple's Mac OS X.

    1. Re:In further news... by SkinnyKid63 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Richard Stallman announced in a press conference today that Emacs is the safest operating system on the planet. According to Stallman Emacs is safer than Linux, Windows Vista, or Apple's Mac OS X.

      Yes, but it's missing a decent text editor.

  9. There's always a get-out clause by tenchima · · Score: 5, Funny

    He never stated which planet...

    --
    If at first you don't succeed, so much for skydiving.
  10. oops by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    "..It's also the most secure OS on the planet, including Linux and open source and Apple Leopard. It's the safest and most secure OS on the planet today.... oh...uh.... i mean NOT including.. NOT including, sorry i misread that part, it actually says NOT including so.... can i start again please?"

  11. Re:today.... by networkBoy · · Score: 2, Funny

    5 bucks says some exploits launch just to poke holes in their statement.

    Next major worm will only target Vista and will spam MS addresses with

    EPIC FAIL
    This spam was sent from a compromised Vista machine.

    --
    whois gawk date unzip strip find touch finger mount join nice man top fsck grep eject more yes exit umount sleep dump
  12. I see what you did there by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Flight Simulator ... grounded.

    Please leave and never come back.

  13. Awesome! by DoofusOfDeath · · Score: 3, Funny

    "Vista today, post-Service Pack 2, which is now in the marketplace, is the safest, most reliable OS we've ever built.

    Security through obscurity?

    Brilliant!

  14. What planet? by Xarun · · Score: 2, Funny

    Did they send a copy of Vista SP2 to Mars or something?

  15. In other NON-News... by killmenow · · Score: 4, Funny

    Today Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google, proclaimed "Google search is the best search on the planet!"

    Also, Tom Long, CEO of Miller Brewing Company announced, "Our beer is the best tasting beer in the world!"

    Here's a template: [Insert Person's Name Here], [insert title here] of [insert company name here] [announced|proclaimed|stated|declared|quothed] "[insert company's product here] is the [insert positive attribute here] in the entire [world|planet|universe]."

    Repeat, ad infinitum.

    1. Re:In other NON-News... by DavidD_CA · · Score: 2, Funny

      Killmenow, user of Slashdot, stated, "My template is the best in the entire world."

      --
      -David
  16. Re:is the safest, most reliable OS we've ever buil by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yes, it can. It just has to run over a few cars first. :)

  17. Why is it secure? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Thats because we are never going to let SP2 out of our vault ... that's why!

  18. Re:See a problem? Check Vista SP2's release date by Chyeld · · Score: 4, Funny

    You are missing the point. SP2 is secure because no one can hack it. No one can hack it, because it hasn't been released. Microsoft has finially discovered how to ensure their products are invunerable to hackers, simply never release anything.

    I pray they will only roll this technology forward to all future product lines...

  19. No shit? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Probably because nothing runs on vista. Not even viruses.

  20. Unsupported claims. by lattyware · · Score: 2, Funny

    The foundation of any fact.

    --
    -- Lattyware (www.lattyware.co.uk)
  21. Windows Rulz! by qazwart · · Score: 2, Funny
    Windows rulz and Linux sux. If you use Linux you're a luzr!

    Oh, wait this is Slashdot! Sorry.

    Linux rulz and Windoze Sux! If you use Windows you're a luzr!

    ---
    Posted on my iPhone.

  22. It's true! by thetoadwarrior · · Score: 2, Funny

    I'm sure no one can hack Vista SP2 because no one is using it. Therefore it's impenetrable!

  23. Dave Barry to the rescue by Citizen+of+Earth · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Saying that [Vista] is the most stable MS OS is like saying that asparagus is the most articulate vegetable." -- Dave Barry

  24. IE will NOT fill your computer with child porn! by David+Gerard · · Score: 4, Funny

    Microsoft is reeling from the vicious and unwarranted slanders of security companies and the US government's Computer Emergency Response Team that its Internet Explorer web browser has alleged "security holes" or is in any way less than the finest software known to mankind and excellent value for your money.

    The festering paedophiles of CERT have gone so outrageously far as to make the ludicrous claim that just viewing a malicious webpage in IE could leave your computer open to being hacked and turned into a Russian Mafia spam server. "We don't know what could have triggered such vindictiveness," sobbed Microsoft marketing marketer's marketer Steve Ballmer. "Do they hate free enterprise that much?"

    There are things you can do to make your computing experience even more secure. Microsoft's official suggestion -- make sure your anti-virus software is up to date and using an entire CPU doing nothing much, click through five screens to run IE in "protected mode," click through four screens to set zone security to "high," click "JUST BLOODY DO IT WILL YOU" when the User Access Control asks if you really want to do this, enable automatic updates with the minor side-effect of installing Microsoft DRM on your system or Windows Genuine Advantage randomly turning your computer into a paperweight, and sacrifice a goat to Microsoft at midnight on a moonless night -- is simple and straightforward. "It's the quality you're paying for."

    On no account should you consider that there might be other web browsers out there, as researchers have demonstrated that all of them automatically download the cover of Virgin Killer. "I saw a report," said marketing marketer John Curran of Microsoft Completely Enderlependent Analysts, Inc., "that another browser had more vulnerabilities than ours! People would be very foolish indeed to move from the latest IE to Netscape 4.01."

    "These CERT wankers are Mactards and trolls," said Guardian marketing marketer Jack Schofield. "They just want to take IE users out, brutally sodomise them, gas them in concentration camps and" [This comment has been removed by a Guardian moderator. Replies may also be deleted.]

    --
    http://rocknerd.co.uk
  25. Re:The problematic truth by DAldredge · · Score: 4, Funny

    I use it (Vista) because it is the best tool for my needs.

  26. Hah! Beat tat Windows suckers by bwashed75 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I installed Zenwalk Linux on my 79 year old Mom's compromised (by malware) XP computer two weeks ago.

    Linux can run on 79 year old hardware.

  27. Re:The problematic truth by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'm sure I can't speak for everyone here, but I have Vista simply because it works. No, it's not perfect. Yes, Microsoft always seems to fall a bit short when polishing their GUIs. But even though Vista annoys me, it annoys me less than XP did and far less than any Linux distro I've ever tried.

    Seriously, if all the major Linux distro groups would just quit their bitching and work together, it could be amazing. But there is just way too much fragmentation right now. I really wish Red Hat would have absorbed Suse instead of Novell.

  28. Re:I have a keyboard... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Seriously, though, XP supports 5-button mice and out of the box. Not sure about keyboards

    Xp supports 5-button keyboards out of the box too.

  29. Re:That's great... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    >I'm actually typing this in Internet Explorer 8 on Windows Vista Business SP1 32-bit on a Pentium M 1.4 GHz with 1 GB RAM, and it's actually quite snappy.

    Pics or it didn't happen.