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Lala Invents Network DRM
An anonymous reader writes in with a CNet story about the record label-backed music company Lala, which claims to have invented "Network DRM." Lala has filed for a patent on moving DRM from a file wrapper, like Windows Media and FairPlay, to the server. Digital music veteran Michael Robertson has quotes from the patent application on his blog. (Here is the application.) Lala describes an invention that monitors every access, allows only authorized devices (so far there are none), blocks downloads, and can revoke content at the labels' request.
I cracked it yesterday. Next.
Thank God! I have been clamoring for this for years! Where can I buy one? forget that... where can I buy seven!!!!11111!!!!
In other words, it's a patent on how to not distribute content.
...you can record it. Case closed.
Yeah, but this amazingly intrusive technology was planning for that:
(i) scanning storage files of the user's computer to identify any digital media content files stored therein,(ii) uploading a list of any identified digital media content files to the host computer system, and(iii) adding to the list any digital media content files that the user purchases from the purchasing component of the host computer system
You would think it would end at notifying the mothership that you are in possession of that file. Nope, from the details:
For each digital media file on the list, the Uploader finds the matching source file and transcodes the media into a format supported by the system components, if necessary.
Man, I can't wait to install that uploader only to find my entire MP3 collection has been transformed to .lala and no longer works unless I pay for it. Sounds a bit like my medical records.
My work here is dung.
Lala .. Layla - I see where you're going - then I found out that they have financial backing from Warner Music Group - and at that point, for some weird reason, all I could hear in my head was the theme to Rawhide.
At first I thought that maybe my subconscious was thinking of Warner treating people like cattle. But then, I realized that what I was really thinking was that it's the music industry that are all animals - and not the scary kind - just the stupid bovine kind.
You know, the kind that will stampede over a cliff to their death if that's what the rest of them are doing.
Say ... are we on top of an escarpment (Balcones, to a few of you Texans out there)? "Rowdy! Give me a hand over here!"
Rollin', rollin', rollin'...
Pathological kinda promises Path + Logical - but instead, you get stuck with pathetic.
You can certainly say this whole idea came out of lala-land.
...and so on. I'd continue, but have to go eat lunch.
Public use of any portable music system is a virtually guaranteed indicator of sociopathic tendencies. -- Zoso
If your computer is playing it to you, you obviously did download it, and it obviously resides somewhere in your system's memory.
They thought about that. The audio data itself never actually gets to your computer; it all resides on the server and is played from there.
They just need really, really big speakers so you can hear the music from your house.
You are too narrow-minded, I am quite willing to pay for DRM content. I do stipulate restrictions on how my money (and it is *my money*, i designed it myself) is used: it cannot be transferred to another country, nor transferred electronically, it is forbidden to reproduce likenesses of it, I offer no guarantee that it will continue to function, I reserve the right to cancel it at any time without notice, etc.
Astoundingly, despite their claims to support DRM, no music or video company will let me purchase their products.
They whose government reduces their essential liberties for temporary security, receive neither liberty nor security.
Wow, finally! I've been looking for a way to make my music listening situation drastically more cumbersome and painful!
Sounds like they finally listened to all those people that kept calling for more restrictive listening scenarios!
-Taylor
Worldwide Military budgets: $2100 billion. Worldwide Space Exploration budgets: $38 billion. Really, world? Really?
What'll you do when it gets quiet
and nothing's stored on your hard drive?
You've been renting not owning all those songs.
You know it's just a foolish buy.
Lala, I'm typing on my keys.
Lala, I need my MP3s.
Lala, darling please release my music files.
I tried to tell you not to do it,
that the server would go down.
Like a fool, you used their music tools,
Now you're left without your sounds.
Chorus
Let's store all of our own information,
you know it saves us from the pain.
Please don't say you've found a better way,
we've tried things in the same ol' vein.
Chorus
Help! Help! I'm being repressed!
File a patent on a business method involving patenting all the really bad ideas we don't want to see implemented.
(c) pay network listening (like SiriusXM)
Wow - SiriusXM scans your entire hard disk when you subscribe and uploads to its servers a complete catalog of all of the music files that they find on your computer (and is funded by an RIAA member), and then when that is complete - gives you pay-network listening?
I did NOT know that SiriusXM was like Lala in that regard.
This doesn't sound as evil as it's being made to be.
Either we have different ideas of what evil is, or you're comparing to sufficiently large values of evil - or something.
Pathological kinda promises Path + Logical - but instead, you get stuck with pathetic.
If you loan it to your "friend" and this "friend" picks up an underage hooker while purchasing some crack and then gets stopped for DUII, then yes, you will lose your car.
Your metaphor appears to be confusing "friend" with "music industry executive".
...you can record it. Case closed.
"Lala describes an invention that monitors every access, allows only authorized devices (so far there are none) [ ... ]"
Except you *can't* hear it. That's why it's brilliant.
May contain traces of nut.
Made from the freshest electrons.