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Ball And Chain To Force Children To Study
You haven't tried everything to get your kids to study until you've tried the Study Ball. The Study Ball is a 21-pound prison-style device that locks onto your child's leg and only unlocks after a predetermined amount of study time has passed. The homework manacles can't be locked for more than four hours, and come with a safety key. The product website states, "Quite often, students who are having problems concentrating tend to get up every ten minutes to watch TV, talk on the phone, take something out of the fridge, and a long list of other distractions. Were they to dedicate all this wasted time to studying, they would optimise their performance and have more free time available. Study Ball helps you study more and more efficiently." Stop Teasing Your Brother Pepper Spray coming soon.
For a moment there I thought you were talking about the old trouble and strife!
Once I was a four stone apology. Now I am two separate gorillas.
...to help me study for my CCNP exam. I keep finding ways to get distracted by more exciting material (squirrels, birds, my girlfriend, my rabbit, watching grass grow...)
Wouldn't the biological alternative, "parents", also trigger such an effect?
Table-ized A.I.
Everybody RUN!
1 hours later...
Fireman: WTF do you mean your child had a ball and chain strapped to their leg?!
Retarded Parent: It was to help them study, and it was easily heavy enough for them to lift.
Fireman: But it got stuck under the table because of the panic and now your child is a crispy critter.
Policeman: Sir, please put your hands behind your back.
Heh, no I'm not some liberal pansy that doesn't believe in doing things that are harsh. I just don't care for stupid. If my kids dont' study I beat them with the ball and chain, not strap them to it!
Do not meddle in the affairs of sysadmins, for they are subtle, and quick to anger.
Ball and chains are my fetish, and good luck trying to get it to stop me from alt+tabbing to my cowboy neal porn.
It just needs a slight modification is all!
Does child protective services know about this?
Use your pickaxe to dig a pit in the floor, drag the ball into the pit, and push a boulder into the pit.
Oh, wait, real life doesn't work quite like Nethack.
I am officially gone from
Luckily it comes with a matching chamberpot.
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
As evidenced by your post, no.
HA!
Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV? Sitting down with your children? And hitting them?
Do not taunt happy fun ball and chain.
I'm an American. I love this country and the freedoms that we used to have.
The older I get the more thankful I get to my mother for those lessons.
Why do I get the feeling that we're going to be hearing about you as the central figure in a tragic event any day now?
"He was kind of a loner", said his not-very-surprised colleagues...
-jcr
The only title of honor that a tyrant can grant is "Enemy of the State."
And what, prey tell, is wrong with the good ol' fashion genital cuffs? I know water boarding is the "in" thing these days, but there's no reason to abandon traditional methods when they work just fine.
I was raised on the cuffs, and my scholastic performance was excellent, thank you very much.
I've never met a person who was a PHD, or who had straight A's that didn't have a personality disorder of some kind. Something has to be wrong with anyone who would be willing to put up with that much bs for that many years for almost no reason at all. It says something about your priorities.
So? I've never met a person who didn't have a personality disorder of some sort.
If someone is passing you on the right, you are an asshole for driving in the wrong lane.
I wholeheartedly endorse this product.
no no no the BS comes many years before the PHD...
So? I've never met a person who didn't have a personality disorder of some sort.
Hm, interesting. So if personality disorders are, as a class, normal, and a "disorder" is by definition something functioning abnormally, then would this not mean that psychologists should recognize Lack of Personality Disorder Disorder?
Treatment for this disorder would be quite straightforward, though the ethics of giving someone Post Traumatic Stress Disorder to cure their Lack of Personality Disorder Disorder are questionable.
The enemies of Democracy are
Is it just me, or does the attached digital timer make it look like something Wile E. Coyote would blow himself up with while falling off of a cliff?
So? I've never met a person.
*posted from my cave*
You are using English. Please learn the difference between loose and lose; they're, there, and their; your and you're.
I can corroborate the GP post. I owe my Nobel Prize to my mother's constant beatings. While I received it for work in particle physics, these days she appears to be whipping me more in the direction of string theory.
how many pairs of boxer shorts should you own?
as my wife and I were unable to conceive, we adopted a monkey instead. I spanked my monkey daily, often with her enthusiastic participation, and even now I swell with pride at the thought of the fine upstanding citizen he has become.
how many pairs of boxer shorts should you own?
So? I've never met a person who didn't have a personality disorder of some sort.
Mmmm, try leaving slashdot
I have. The disorders are worse.
If someone is passing you on the right, you are an asshole for driving in the wrong lane.
Hmmm... Is this thing manufactured by the infamous ACME company?
These are the people commonly referred to as Engineers.
If you post it, they will read.
I always thought it was "Bull Sh*t, More Sh*t, Piled Higher & Deeper"